Dead Silent
by Chuckyegg
Summary: Negan meets a mute girl in Alexandria. She naturally hates his guts, but will she warm to him? Loveable asshole that he is.
1. Chapter 1

Negan pulls up to the gates of Alexandria. It had been two weeks since his last pick up. Which he figured was plenty enough time for Rick to have found him some good shit. He steps out of the truck, whistling as he swings Lucille.

"Well don't just stand there, open the fuck up!" He shouts at the man behind the gate.

Eugene opens the gate nervously.

Negan steps inside, taking a quick scan. He looks up, and his eyes hover over a girl standing guard on the platform near the gate. Negan smiles, as he looks her over. She's about 5ft 3, brunette, with a really nice ass. He bites on his bottom lip.

"Hey!" He shouts up.

She looks down at him, and frowns. This is her first encounter with Negan. She'd purposely stayed out of his way the last time he'd come. Now, she silently wished she had chosen to guard the gate last night.

"Hi!" Negan says, smiling up at her.

She nods, then continues looking out at the road.

Negan frowns. "What's the matter? Cat got your fucking tongue or some shit?"

She glances at him briefly, giving him daggers.

"Well that was rude," Dave says. "You should teach her a lesson."

"Mind your business, Dave," Negan warns.

"Sorry, boss," he say instantly.

Negan sees Rick in the distance walking towards him. Negan steps further inside, as Eugene closes the gate.

"Hey," Negan says, stepping towards Rick. "What the fuck is her problem? I try to be all polite and shit, and she gives me the damn silent treatment," Negan asks.

Rick stares at him. "She's mute," he says.

Negan's face drops. "You're fucking kidding me right?"

Rick just stares at him, tilting his head slightly.

Negan runs his hand over his face. "Shit. I'm such a fucking asshole. Go on, Rick, you might as well admit it, i just know you think so too," Negan smiles.

Rick turns away briefly. "Can we just get this over with?" He mumbles.

Negan grins. "Sure, Rick."

The saviors load up Alexandria's offerings. Negan stands with Rick by the gate.

"Well, prick, i guess i'll see you in another week," Negan smiles.

Rick frowns. "I thought you said two weeks?"

"Yeah, but you didn't exactly have much to fucking offer. So i'll be back in one week, and you better have something good for me," Negan warns him.

Negan looks up at the platform, then he climbs up.

She turns to him briefly, before looking back at the road.

"I wanna apologize for earlier," Negan says. "If i'd known you were mute, i wouldn't have said what i did. I'm kind of an asshole sometimes, you'll get used to it," he chuckles.

She stares at him, then shrugs her shoulders.

"Any fucking hoo, i guess i'll see you in a week," he smiles, then heads back down the platform.

 _Asshole!_ She thinks.

Negan heads to his truck. "John, come here," he says, motioning with his hand. "Keep someone posted near here," Negan whispers.

"Sure thing, Negan, any particular reason?" John asks.

"I want them to keep an eye on that girl there on lookout. Don't fucking look, Jesus, discreet isn't your middle fucking name is it," Negan frowns.

"Sorry, Negan," John says.

"If she leaves Alexandria, get straight on the radio to me," Negan orders.

John nods, then walks off.

She watches the saviors drive away. She wishes she could have told Negan to go fuck himself. Her heart pounds with pure frustration.

"You okay?" Rick shouts up.

She looks down at him and nods.

Rick makes his way up to her. "Did he upset you?" Rick asks, placing a hand against her shoulder.

She shakes her head.

"I'm sorry. The guy's an asshole, clearly. We won't be under his rule forever," Rick assures her.

She gives him a doubtful look.

"I mean it, we just need to get everyone on board. We need more people. Right now, we have nowhere near enough to go up against him," Rick reasons.

She shrugs, turning away from him.

"You've been up here long enough. You want me to take over?" Rick offers.

She shakes her head, and points towards Rosita's house. She holds up five fingers. Signalling that Rosita will take over in five minutes.

Rick nods. "Okay, i'll see you later," he says, before heading back down the platform.

* * *

Rosita takes over her shift, and she heads back to her house.

"Hey!" Daryl shouts from his porch.

She turns, waving at him. She makes her way over, sitting beside him on the porch swing.

"Rick said Negan spoke with you," Daryl says.

She nods.

"What'd he say?" Daryl asks, frowning.

She grabs her pad and paper from her jacket pocket. _Just shit mostly. Nothing of importance._ She writes.

Daryl offers her a cigarette. She accepts it gratefully. They sit there a while, in silence.

Daryl likes her. He gets along with her, more than anyone else. Being a quiet person himself, he has an affinity with her. Strangely though, he talks to her more than anyone else, which she doesn't seem to mind.

She stands up, and gives Daryl a little wave, heading to her house, just across the street.

"Seeya," Daryl nods, watching her leave.


	2. Chapter 2

The sun shines in through the curtains waking her. She stretches, letting out a silent yawn. Shuffling off the bed, she dresses in dark skinny jeans, a black vest, and brown boots. She tucks her knife into her belt. Rummaging through her rucksack, she finds her handgun, and attaches a silencer. She throws on her leather jacket, and grabs her rucksack.

She leaves Alexandria, with no real purpose, other than to get some space. It's something that she does often. Sometimes she'll just wander through the woods, practicing her hunting skills. Other times, she'll wander through small towns, scouring empty buildings, hoping to find something to take back. More often than not, she comes back with something. Last time, it was the very silencer that she has on her gun at this moment in time.

She opts for wandering through the woods, hoping to hone her tracking skills. Daryl had taught her as much as he could. But as he'd explained to her, it was not something you learned overnight. Quite often, you either had it in you, or you didn't. She wasn't so sure she had it in her, but either way, she had at least gotten lucky on occasion, randomly coming across animals from time to time.

She'd been out for about two hours, when she heard a rustling coming from her left. She draws her gun, hoping it's a deer and not a walker. Whatever it is, it sounds big. She places her finger on the trigger, ready to shoot, when something red catches her eye.

"Woah there, sweetheart, i come in fucking peace," Negan chuckles, holding his arms up.

She slowly lowers her gun, a look of disgust on her face.

"I can see i didn't make a very good first impression with you," Negan says, raising an eyebrow.

She shrugs, indicating she doesn't give a shit, wishing silently, that she had the ability to say it. She begins to wander off.

"What, are you just gonna love me and fucking leave me?" He chuckles.

She turns her face to him, and holds her finger to her mouth, shushing him.

"You hunting?" He asks.

She nods.

"Well great, i'll keep you company," Negan smiles.

She rolls her eyes and nods her head, placing her finger over her mouth again, reminding him to be quiet.

Surprisingly, Negan manages to stay silent, mostly because he's looking at her ass. But also, because he's intrigued to see if she'll actually catch anything.

Sure enough, after thirty minutes of walking in silence. Which was pure torture for Negan. They see a deer in the distance. She signals for him to remain quiet, and still. She aims her gun, and pulls the trigger. The bullet goes through the deer's head, and it falls to the ground.

"Fuck yeah!" Negan smiles.

She makes her way over to it, kneeling beside it.

"Hey, you don't have to do that," Negan says, kneeling beside her. "I'll carry it for you," he offers.

She shakes her head.

"Come on, you can't carry this back on your own," he frowns.

She takes her pad out of her pocket. _I don't need your help._ She writes.

Negan stares at her. "You're probably fucking right, sweetheart. I bet you could carry this back on your own. But i'm offering. At least let me carry it most of the way," he suggests.

She stands still for a moment, then nods.

Negan smiles, then picks the deer up, carrying it over his shoulders.

"So what's your name?" He asks.

She glances at him briefly.

"Look, i can't help it. I'm a fucking talker, what can i say?" He laughs.

She takes out her pad. _Kirsty._ She writes.

"Kirsty," he says, "how long have you been with Rick's group?"

She holds up six fingers.

"Six months?" He asks.

She makes a seesaw gesture with her hand.

They hear a rustling in the distance. Kirsty holds up her hand, and removes the knife from her belt. Two walkers make their way through the trees ahead. She makes her way to them, pushing the first one over, and taking out the second with a knife to the head. Kirsty slides her knife through the first one's temple, before it has a chance to get to it's feet.

Negan watches her, grinning from ear to ear, his eyes alight. As she gets back up, he notices a scar across her neck. He wonders how he didn't notice it before. It's about five inches long, running from left to right. He guesses he must have been too busy checking out her ass.

She motions with her head for them to continue walking.

"That was pretty fucking cool," Negan smiles. "So were you born mute?" He asks, wondering about that scar on her neck.

Kirsty shakes her head.

"So what happened? How'd you lose your voice?" He asks.

She shakes her head, looking down at the ground.

Negan nods. "Okay, we don't have to talk about it," he says sincerely.

She looks at him briefly.

"I'd fucking hate not being able to talk. It's one of my favourite fucking things, aside from women," he smiles.

Kirsty begins to write, Negan watches her intently. She holds the pad towards him. _The worst thing about being mute, is having to listen to people's shit, and not being able to tell them to shut the fuck up!_

Negan laughs. "That's pretty fucking funny."

She writes. _I wasn't joking. Being mute does have it's uses though._

"Really?" He asks, raising an eyebrow.

 _Yes. People automatically assume i'm dumb, so they kind of forget i'm there. Loose lips and all that._ She writes.

Negan frowns briefly when he reads the first line. But then he smiles. "I can imagine you're right, sweetheart. People are all kinds of stupid. Using it to your advantage though, that's fucking smart. I'm curious though. How come you're not playing dumb with me?" He asks.

 _Because i didn't think you were all kinds of stupid. Or am i wrong?_ She writes.

"Nope, you're spot on, sweetheart. I never underestimate anyone. That shit gets you fucking killed," Negan says.

Kirsty stops, and motions with her hands for the deer.

"You sure you can carry this? We're still twenty minutes away from Alexandria, at least," Negan asks.

Kirsty nods. Negan kneels, rolling the deer off his shoulders. She places it on her own shoulders.

"Well it was nice talking to you, sweetheart," Negan smiles.

Kirsty frowns.

"You know what i fucking mean," He laughs.

Kirsty nods, then turns, heading for Alexandria.

Negan watches her leave. "Fuck, i gotta find a way to get into those fucking panties," he says to himself.


	3. Chapter 3

Kirsty sits with her feet up, reading a book. She'd purposely taken the last two late shifts, knowing Negan would be due any day now. She wanted to avoid him at all costs. She had told Rick about her encounter with Negan in the woods, and Rick hadn't been best pleased about it.

"I'm sorry. I know he's the last person you wanna see. Next time he comes, just stay home. I'll give him his shit at the gate," Rick had said.

So she had swapped shifts with Carol. "You were alone with him?" Carol had said. "You should have taken him out while you had the chance."

 _It's not as simple as that. Taking him out doesn't take out all the saviors, if anything, it'd just start a war, and we don't have enough men for that,_ Kirsty had written. Carol had unwillingly agreed with her.

* * *

Negan pulls up at the gates of Alexandria. He'd thought of little else, other than Kirsty, and was disappointed not to see her patrolling the fence. He exits the truck and heads inside. "Hey, Rick! You miss me?" Negan smiles. "Because i missed you."

"I got your stuff," Rick says, straight faced.

"Straight to the fucking point i see. You know, it wouldn't hurt you to engage in a little conversation once in a while," Negan chuckles, as he follows Rick.

Negan tuts, as he looks over Rick's offerings. "Rick. Didn't we talk about this? I mean, what the fuck even is this? It's a damn, fucking, insult, that's what it is."

"We need more time," Rick says.

Negan turns to him. "You need to get your damn ass out there, and find me some better shit, that's what you need, Rick!" Negan rubs his temples.

"We'll do better next time," Rick promises.

Negan runs his tongue over his teeth, letting out a tsk. "Where's Kirsty?"

"She's sleeping," Rick says.

"I didn't ask what she was fucking doing. I asked where she was," Negan frowns.

Rick stares at him, gritting his teeth.

"Well?" Negan asks.

"Does it matter? She's sleeping," Rick scowls.

Negan moves closer to him. "I decide what matters, prick. Now, you either point me in the right direction, or i'm gonna have all my little soldiers, strip your damn house's bare. So what's it gonna be, prick?"

* * *

Kirsty hears a knock at the door. She gets up from her seat, assuming it's Rick coming to tell her the coast is clear. She opens the door, and is greeted by Negan.

"Kirsty!" He smiles. "Would you look at that, Rick. She wasn't asleep after all. You wasn't lying to me, was you, prick?" Negan asks, turning to Rick.

Kirsty looks at Rick standing nervously at the bottom of her yard.

"I thought she was sleeping," Rick says, glancing at the ground.

"Sure you did. Any fucking hoo! You gonna invite me in, sweetheart?" Negan asks.

Kirsty stares at him, then she steps aside. Negan walks in, shutting the door behind him.

"This is a nice place you got. Beats the shit out of my place," Negan chuckles.

Kirsty stands in the hall, writing in her pad.

Negan walks over to her, as she holds the pad out to him.

 _What do you want?_ He reads.

"Well a drink might be fucking nice. If it's not too much to ask," he grins.

She gestures with her hand towards the kitchen. Kirsty rifles through the cupboard. She points at a jar of coffee.

"Yeah, sure. I'd love some, sweetheart," he smiles. "Let me get that-" he starts, as she climbs up onto the counter. "Never mind," Negan grins, as he has the perfect view of her ass.

Kirsty places the coffee on the counter, and jumps down. She fills the pot with water, placing it on the stove.

Negan sits on a stool, resting his arm against the counter.

"So, did you miss me?" He grins

Kirsty stares at him, then continues pouring coffee grounds into the cafeteria.

"Why don't you come take a seat while that boils," Negan smiles, patting the stool in front of him.

She sits down, a little reluctantly. She shows him the notepad once again. _What do you want?_

"Just the pleasure of your company, sweetheart," Negan smiles.

Kirsty rolls her eyes.

"Do you have someone? You must have someone, right?" Negan asks.

She shakes her head, and begins tapping her fingers on the counter.

"Fuck! How is that possible? You're hot as hell," Negan grins, biting his lip.

Kirsty shrugs.

The pot begins to whistle. Kirsty gets up from her seat. She fills the cafeteria with water, bringing it over to the counter in front of Negan.

"You not having some?" Negan asks.

She shakes her head.

"So, i'm curious. And answer me honestly, sweetheart. Were you involved with the attack at my outpost?" Negan asks.

Kirsty looks him straight in the eye, and nods.

Negan smiles, running his tongue over his lip. "I thought you might be. So how many of my men did you take out yourself?"

She shrugs.

"Fuck. That is cold as shit, sweetheart," Negan says.

 _How many people have you killed?_ She writes.

Negan raises an eyebrow. "Fair point," he chuckles.

Kirsty pours his coffee, she points to a pot of sugar.

"Just one, i'm fucking sweet enough," he smiles.

Kirsty raises an eyebrow.

"What? You don't think i'm sweet?" Negan smiles. "Actually, don't fucking answer that."

 _So seriously. What do you want?_ She writes.

Negan sighs. "I know what i fucking want, sweetheart," he practically purrs. His eyes looking her over greedily. "Best to give that some time though," Negan smiles.

 _You could have all the time in the world. And that wouldn't happen!_ She writes.

Negan smiles. "Wow! What makes you think i was talking about that?"

 _I'm mute, not blind._ Kirsty writes.

"True, or maybe you just have a dirty mind," he laughs.

She turns her face away from him in disgust.

Negan bites the inside of his cheek. "Alright, sweetheart. I'll be honest. Your fearless leader, Rick, is treading on thin, fucking ice. His last two offerings have been a damn insult. Now, normally, someone would be getting their brains bashed in, but now, i'm thinking there might be a better way to handle this. Something that will be more beneficial for the both of us," he smiles.

 _Such as?_ Kirsty writes.

"Hmm, i want you to work for me," Negan says, his eyes burning into hers.

 _I already work for you._ She writes.

"Good answer! I fucking like that!" He beams, his eyes alight. "But i wanna see what you can do first-hand. I want you to work with me and my men, out there," he motions with his hand.

 _I don't think Rick will like that._ She writes, her hand shaking slightly.

"In case you hadn't noticed, sweetheart. Rick isn't making the decisions any more," he smiles, getting up from his seat. "Come on, let's step outside."

* * *

Rick stands at the bottom of Kirsty's yard, shifting his feet impatiently. He looks up at the sound of her front door opening. Negan smiles in Rick's direction, with Kirsty right behind him.

"Rick!" Negan smiles, walking over to him. "You got a good one here. If only the rest of your men were like her, then i don't think we'd have a fucking problem."

"I didn't think we had a problem. I got you your supplies, just like you asked," Rick says, clenching his jaw.

"You didn't get me shit! Watch how you're talking to me, Rick, or i might just have to remind you who the fuck i am," Negan warns him, his eyes cold.

Rick looks down at his feet, squeezing his tongue between his teeth.

"Now. I was gonna bash someone's head in, and believe me, Lucille, is fucking thirsty. But luckily for you, your girl Kirsty, just agreed to work with me and my men," Negan smiles.

Rick looks over at Kirsty, his breath becoming heavy. "Don't, please. Just leave her out of this," Rick pleads.

"I'm not asking your permission, Rick. And i don't care for the way you're looking at me right now, so cut that shit out. It's pretty fucking simple, Rick. Either she comes working with me tomorrow, and i bring her back, safe and fucking sound. Or, you kick up a fucking fuss, i kill one of your men, then i take her anyway. Only that way, i won't be bringing her back. So what's it gonna be, prick?" Negan frowns.

Rick stares at him, putting all his effort into not grabbing Negan's baseball bat, and smashing his smug face in. Instead, he glances over at Kirsty, giving her a sympathetic look, then he nods.

"Smart move," Negan chuckles. "Alright, let's move out," he orders his men. Negan looks over at Kirsty. "I'll be here around six, so make sure you're up bright and early, sweetheart."

Kirsty nods, watching him leave. She looks over at Rick.

"I'm sorry," he says.

Kirsty shakes her head, then heads inside.


	4. Chapter 4

Alexandria is silent, most of it's resident's sleeping soundly. Michonne guards the gate, a rifle in her hands. She hears footsteps from the other side of the gate and instinctively aims her weapon.

"Don't shoot, i got squirrel," comes a familiar voice.

"Daryl? I didn't even know you'd gone out," she smiles, making her way down the platform.

"That's cos i'm good, slipped out yesterday morning," Daryl smiles. "Did he come?" He asks, his smile fading.

"He did. He's coming back tomorrow though," Michonne says.

Daryl frowns. "Why? He didn't get enough today? Asshole doesn't know when he's unwelcome."

"He wants Kirsty to work with him," she says.

Daryl furrows his brow. "What? And Rick agreed to that?"

Michonne shakes her head. "He doesn't have a choice, Daryl. None of us do."

"There's always a choice," Daryl mumbles, walking off.

* * *

Kirsty sits on her porch swing, smoking a cigarette. She'd barely slept, and when she had, she'd dreamt of Abraham. Kirsty had been close with both Glenn and Abraham. But she'd been much closer to Abe, laughing at his jokes in the silent way that she had. He had always taken the time to talk with her. The people at Alexandria were good, but she was well aware that she made some of them uncomfortable. She guessed maybe they found it hard, kinda like having a one-way conversation. But mostly, she thought maybe they assumed she was dumb. Kirsty always thought that.

She sees Daryl walking towards his house. Kirsty claps her hands. Daryl turns his head, then makes his way over.

"Michonne just told me about Negan," he says, twiddling with the strap of his crossbow. "You don't have to go."

Kirsty nods her head.

"I'll talk with Rick, maybe-" he starts.

Kirsty shakes her head, and writes on her pad. _I'll be fine, don't worry about me._

Daryl's face almost touches the paper, as he attempts to read it in the dark.

"It ain't right, Rick should know it ain't," he frowns.

 _He knows. There just isn't much he can do about it. You should probably make yourself scarce when he gets here._ She writes.

Daryl looks down at his feet. "Maybe i'll offer to work with him instead?"

She shakes her head. _That's sweet, but you should probably go shower. You smell like an armpit._ Kirsty writes.

Daryl shakes his hair away from his face and smiles. "This is a man smell."

 _Yeah, sure._ She writes, smiling.

He looks down at his feet again, his hair covering half his face. "Don't go."

Kirsty writes. Then she walks over to him, placing her finger under his chin, tilting his head towards the paper. _I have to, you know that. I'll be fine. I'm tougher than i look._

Daryl shifts his feet, biting on his lip nervously. He nods, then walks away.

* * *

Kirsty stands at the gate with Rick.

"You okay with this?" Rick asks.

 _I don't really have a choice. But either way, i'm fine. Maybe this is a good thing? Maybe I can get some inside info?_ She writes. After he reads it, she tears the piece of paper from the pad, and hands it to him. _Burn it,_ she mouths.

They both turn their heads at the sound of an engine outside the gates. Kirsty pulls the gate open, hoping to avoid Negan entering Alexandria.

Negan watches her head out the gate. He gets out of the truck, walking over to the passenger side to open the door for her. "See, am i a fucking gentleman, or what?" He smiles, closing the door behind her. "I'll bring her back safe and sound, Rick," he grins.

* * *

 _Where are we going?_ Kirsty writes.

Negan glances at the piece of paper as he drives. "We're going on a run. My men found a big shopping mall a few miles from here. It looks overrun, but we're gonna clear it, because that's what we do. You think you can handle that, sweetheart?"

Kirsty nods.

Negan pulls up at the side of four other trucks. He steps out, resting Lucille against his shoulder. "Fill me the fuck in."

Kirsty steps out of the truck, scanning the area.

"We've got rid of the dead outside. Arat led them away, just cranked the music up in her truck. She's gonna keep driving them out, then Joey will take over from there," Negan's soldier informs him.

Negan nods. "Good. Do we know how many dead fucks are inside?"

He shakes his head. "We're not sure, but i'm confident we can handle it."

Negan pat's him on the back. "That's what i like to hear. Let's get fucking to it!" He turns to Kirsty. "Let's get you armed."

Kirsty follows him to the back of the truck. There are a whole array of weapons laid out before her.

"Pick one," Negan ushers with his hand.

Kirsty grabs an automatic rifle.

Negan chuckles. "You sure you can handle that? Looks almost as big as you, sweetheart."

Kirsty sneers at him, hanging the rifle over her shoulder.

* * *

Negan, Kirsty and eight of Negan's saviors stand outside the main doors of the mall. One of his men cuts the chains holding the doors together.

"Kirsty," Negan motions with his hand. "You stick to my left."

Kirsty holds the rifle against her shoulder, walking to Negan's left as he enters the building.

"Remember, unless it's too many to fucking handle, you use your knives. Don't wanna attract unwanted attention unless it's absolutely necessary," Negan whispers.

They enter two at a time, each person aiming in different directions. It's an average sized mall with two floors. An array of stores on each side, the majority of them with their shutters pulled down.

Kirsty clicks her fingers and points towards a clothes store to her right.

Negan looks in that direction. He nods. "I see it," he whispers, referring to the dead inside. Luckily for them, the shutter is down. "Let's push on. We'll secure this floor. We can deal with those fuckers later."

Every store on the ground floor is locked up tight. As far as they can see, only two of them are filled with the dead.

"You two," Negan points. "You guard the main doors. We're gonna check upstairs."

His men nod, turning and heading for the entrance.

Kirsty looks up at the next floor. It's hard to tell whether there are more dead up there, what with the sound of the dead banging against the store windows on the ground floor. Something catches her eye from above. Kirsty's eyes widen. She lunges at Negan, knocking him off his feet.

"What the fuck?" Negan frowns. Then he hears a thud beside him as one of the dead splatters against the floor where he was just standing. "Holy fuck!" He breathes a sigh of relief. "That was fucking close. Thanks for that, sweetheart," he smiles at Kirsty.

Kirsty nods, then makes her way over to the corpse writhing on the floor, putting it out of its misery.

Negan gets up off the floor, giving the railing above a word berth. "And where the fuck were you guys?" He scolds his men. "I nearly ended up a dead fuck pancake."

His men look at him apologetically.

"Fucking fuckers," Negan frowns, heading for the escalator. "Come on, Kirsty. Least you've got my damn back."

They walk up the escalator, the other six saviors not far behind them. About half a dozen walkers ramble round aimlessly. At the scent of fresh meat, they turn towards the escalator.

Negan smiles. "Come on, get your asses up here," he orders his men. Negan swings Lucille at a walker, bits of its brain splattering across the floor.

Kirsty takes one out with her knife, just as Negan's men take out the rest.

"Keep it fucking tight up here," Negan orders. "We got lucky downstairs, let's not fucking push it."

Upstairs is pretty much the same as the ground floor. All the stores are locked tight. Unfortunately, the biggest store is teeming with the dead. Kirsty peeks through the gaps in the shutter. _Looks like there might be food in there, it's hard to tell though._ She writes.

"I think there probably is," Negan nods. "There's a whole fuck load of dead fucks in there though. It'll be hard to clear them out."

 _You gonna use sound?_

"Yeah, but we'll do this one last. Ground floor should be easy enough to clear. This'll be harder. Trying to get these fuckers down an entire floor and out the fucking building. We'll have to be careful," Negan frowns. "You hungry?"

Kirsty nods.

"Come on, let's go take five, then we'll get this shit on the road," he smiles, heading outside.


	5. Chapter 5

Negan sits on the back of a truck next to Kirsty. "Damn this is good," he smiles through a mouthful of food. "Janet really knows her shit. I mean, did you ever think you'd get to eat bread again?"

Kirsty shakes her head, chewing on a mouthful of food. She washes it down with a sip of water, then covers her mouth, letting out a cough.

Negan jumps at the side of her. "Holy fuck! Was that you?"

Kirsty stares at him then nods.

"You scared the shit outta me. I almost choked on my fucking sandwich," he chuckles.

Kirsty smiles. _Shame,_ she mouths.

"Shame? Oh, you mean it's ashame i didn't choke on my sandwich?" He smiles. "That's fucking cold, sweetheart."

Kirsty shrugs, taking another sip of water. She coughs again.

Negan stares at her, an amused look on his face. "That's weird as fuck."

 _Thanks,_ she mouths sarcastically.

"I didn't mean it like that," Negan frowns. "I just.. i haven't heard you make a single noise since i met you. I didn't think that you could."

She takes another drink and coughs again.

Negan raises an eyebrow. "You can tell me to mind my damn business. But that cough, do you have that for the same reason you can't talk?"

Kirsty nods and takes out her notepad. _Sometimes i struggle to swallow._

Negan grins. "That's not something a guy wants to hear."

She turns to him, frowning.

"Sorry," he chuckles. "I couldn't fucking help myself, it was such an obvious joke."

Kirsty rolls her eyes and goes back to eating her sandwich.

* * *

Negan and his men watch as the herd from the ground floor clears, led away by a truck playing it's speaker's full blast.

"Let's hope the fucking first floor goes this smoothly," Negan says. He turns to Kirsty. "You still up for this?"

Kirsty nods.

"You sure? Because if you're not, i can get one of my men to cover my ass."

 _I'm sure,_ she mouths.

"Let's get fucking to it then," he smiles, heading inside.

They make their way back up the escalator, Negan with a set of bolt cutters in one hand, and Lucille in the other. He stands outside the doors of the store. The shutters are already up, just a rusty chain kept the dead locked in. Negan holds the bolt cutters under the chain. He turns to Kirsty.

"You ready? Soon as i cut this, those fuckers are gonna come flying out of here. I'm gonna be really fucking pissed with you if these guys turn me into a fucking Negan buffet," he jokes as he kneels in front of the door. For a moment, he really doubts his decision to have just her there. What the fuck is he actually thinking? Giving his enemy the advantage like this? Christ, if she wanted to, she could just push him into the herd, or hit him with a stray bullet. What the fuck could his men do about it?

Kirsty stands a few feet from the escalator. She holds the rifle in the crook of her shoulder. She aims toward the doors, and nods.

Fuck it! Negan shrugs, and he cuts the chain. The dead burst out of the doors. Negan takes a step back as they lunge towards him, eager for fresh meat. The sound of gunfire fills his ears as Kirsty takes out as many as she can. He runs towards her. "Come on! Let's get the fuck out of here!" He yells.

Kirsty continues firing at the dead until Negan is a safe distance from them, then runs behind him. Once on the ground floor, she fires again with the hope that they'll follow. They do, some rolling down the escalator, others falling straight over the railing. Negan puts his hand up in front of her face, signalling for her to cease fire.

"That should be enough!" He shouts, his ears still ringing from the gunshots. "Let's back the fuck up."

They walk slowly backwards towards the entrance, making sure to keep the dead within their sights.

"Now!" Negan shouts to his men. Music begins to blare from a set of speakers outside. Negan and Kirsty swiftly run to the left of the mall in an attempt to avoid the herd. They stop at the corner of the building. Negan peers round the corner, watching the dead file out. "It's fucking working," he smiles.

They wait a while as the herd clears, then they make their way back towards the front of the mall.

"That was fucking awesome!" Negan smiles. "I fucking love when a plan comes together."

One of his men heads his way. "I got through to Simon on the radio, he's gonna send some more trucks."

"Good," Negan nods. "There's gonna be a whole fuck load of shit in here. We'll do it two to a store. But don't get fucking sloppy, there could still be dead fucks in there," he warns.

* * *

Negan and Kirsty step quietly through the store. Kirsty had swapped her rifle for a large machete, and she'd used it twice already, taking out stragglers in the aisles.

They really have hit the jackpot. In this store alone, the shelves are almost fully stocked. Though there isn't much in the way of food, there are plenty of other much needed items. Kirsty strolls down the feminine hygiene aisle. She glances over at Negan.

He looks at her a little uncomfortably. "I erm.. i'll go take a look elsewhere. Take what you need, you've earned it."

Kirsty takes off her rucksack. She grabs as many boxes of tampons and towels as she can, something Alexandria was in great need of as they'd ran out just over a month ago. She'd constantly reminded Rick every time he'd gone out on a run to keep a look out for stuff like that, but she assumed with him being a guy and periods not being an issue for him, it easily slipped his mind. Michonne had said as much herself.

She walks down the perfume aisle. What she'd give for everyone of those bottles to be a can of food instead. Perfume was definitely an unnecessary item, but then one catches her eye. She takes it from the shelf and holds it in her hand, thinking back to before. Before the world turned to shit.

Negan watches her from a distance. "You want that?"

She places it back on the shelf and shakes her head.

He walks over to her. "Seems like you did. You should take it."

Kirsty points towards her rucksack. _It's full,_ she mouths.

"Jesus," he smiles. "You didn't waste any time. What the fuck did you fill it with?"

 _Feminine stuff,_ she mouths.

"Oh," he says, shifting his feet uncomfortably. "You running low at Alexandria or something?"

Kirsty nods, then she continues down the aisle.

* * *

"I'm gonna leave you in charge," Negan says to one of his saviors. "It's probably gonna be an all nighter, getting all this shit back to the sanctuary. Simon should be here in a couple of hours, so he can take over."

"No problem," his soldier nods, going about his business.

"Come on, Kirsty," Negan gestures towards the truck. "Let's get you back to Alexandria before Rick tries to report me for slave labour."

* * *

"You did real good today," Negan says, his eyes not leaving the road. "I'm gonna be fucking honest. I kinda purposely threw you in the fucking deep end, but you surprised the shit outta me."

 _I just did what you asked,_ she writes.

Negan glances at her notepad and chuckles. "If only it were that fucking simple. People just doing what you fucking ask. It's never that easy, sweetheart. Your man Rick proves that every damn week!"

 _It's getting harder to find stuff,_ she writes.

"We just fucking managed it," he frowns.

 _We got lucky. It's a little bit harder when you not only have to find stuff for yourself, but for others._

"You saying i should give Rick a break?" Negan raises an eyebrow.

 _I'm not saying anything. You'll do what you want to do, nothing more, nothing less._

They drive on in silence.

* * *

They pull up to the gates of Alexandria, Rick eagerly awaiting their return.

Negan chuckles. "Look at him. You know, if i didn't know any fucking better, i'd think he had a thing for you. I mean, look at him standing there. I think he's fucking pining for you."

Kirsty frowns at him. _Shut up!_ She mouths.

"What? I'm just making an observation," he smiles, stepping out of the truck. "Hey, Rick! Come give me a fucking hand here," Negan walks to the back of the truck.

Kirsty glances at Negan, confused.

Rick walks to the back of the truck towards Negan. "What do you want?"

Negan frowns. "Jesus, Rick. Why do you just assume i want something? I fucking got something for you."

"I don't want anything from you," Rick sneers.

Negan stares at him. "Don't speak to soon, prick. You might not want it, but i'm pretty fucking sure your women will," Negan opens a box in the back of the truck. "Feminine shit. Kirsty said you were running low. So, considering that, you, have no fucking use for this, what with you being a guy, i think the decision is outta your fucking hands."

Rick clenches his jaw. "I don't want, anything, from you."

Kirsty elbows Rick out of the way and grabs one side of the box. _Thank you,_ she mouths, looking up at Negan.

Negan grins from ear to ear. "Your welcome, sweetheart. You want me to help you with that?"

Kirsty shakes her head as she holds the box in her arms.

"You worked hard today. I'll give you a couple of days, i'm fucking nice like that," Negan smiles, heading back to his truck. "See you in two days, beautiful."

Kirsty nods and heads for the gate.

Rick watches him drive away then walks towards Kirsty. "I'll get that," he says, going to take the box from her.

 _I got it,_ she mouths.

"We shouldn't accept stuff from him," Rick frowns.

Kirsty places the box on the ground and takes out her pad. _Stop being so proud, Rick. We need this stuff,_ she writes. Kirsty picks up the box and walks off.

* * *

"I don't wanna sound like i'm on Negan's side, because i'm not. But i'm so grateful for this," Olivia sighs with relief as she unpacks the box with Kirsty. "Those cloth things are just.. well, you know."

Kirsty nods in agreement.

"Oh, there's something else at the bottom. I wonder if they put it in by mistake?" Olivia frowns. "You think we should give it them back next time they come?" She asks, holding up a bottle of perfume.

Kirsty takes it from her and shakes her head, stuffing it in her rucksack.


	6. Chapter 6

Kirsty steps out of the shower. It had been two days since her run with Negan, and she had no idea what time he'd turn up. Probably when she least expected it. Wrapping a towel round herself, she heads towards her bedroom. Kirsty walks over to her dressing table and picks up the perfume that Negan had left in the box. She places it back down on the table, reluctant to use it. She gets dressed, twisting her damp hair into a makeshift bun. _It's just perfume. It's not like you've agreed to marry him,_ she thinks as the bottle catches her eye. Kirsty grabs the bottle and sprays a tiny amount onto her neck, then heads downstairs.

"Hey there, beautiful," Negan smiles.

Kirsty stands still at the bottom of the stairs. Negan leans against the front door, Lucille resting on his shoulder. She goes to grab her notepad.

"There's no need for that," Negan waves his hand. "I don't know if you've noticed, but i'm quite good at reading your lips," he smiles.

Kirsty shifts uncomfortably. She has noticed, and if it had been anyone else, she'd be impressed. _What do you want?_ She mouths.

"I said i'd give you two days, and i did," he looks her up and down. "Have you just got outta the shower?" Negan smirks.

Kirsty rolls her eyes and heads to the kitchen, avoiding his gaze. Negan follows her, leaning against the kitchen archway. She pours herself a coffee and gestures the pot towards him.

"Sure, i'll have a quick one. You remember how i take it?"

Kirsty nods and pours his coffee. She sits next to the counter, moving her stool as Negan sits beside her.

"Come on, sweetheart. No need to be like that. I thought we were making progress?" He smiles.

She looks at him coldly. _The only time we'll progress is when i get to stick a knife through your skull._

Negan laughs, his nose crinkling. "Oh, fuck! I've missed this. You've missed me too, right?"

Kirsty frowns and goes back to sipping her coffee. _We going on a run?_ She asks.

"No, i wanted to do something, just the two of us. Got this new place a few miles from the sanctuary. It'll make a great base. My men cleared it out a few days ago, we need to make sure it stays that fucking way."

 _So we're doing what?_ She asks, puzzled.

"Take the car out there and keep watch," he smiles.

 _Awesome, that sounds fun,_ she mouths with a sneer.

"I detect sarcasm. But you're fucking right, it's about as fun as a fucking enema. That's why i want you with me, keep me company. We can get to know one another better," Negan smiles.

 _I don't want to get to know you better._

"Alright, well i can get to know _you_ better," Negan says.

 _I don't want you to know me better._

"Why? You worried what i might find out about you?" He teases.

Kirsty looks away from him, sipping her coffee.

Negan chuckles and downs his drink in one. "You good to go?"

Kirsty nods.

* * *

"You see that big factory building there," Negan points as he drives down the road. "That's the sanctuary. You should come by some time," he smiles.

 _I'll pass,_ Kirsty mouths.

"See, i knew you'd say that. It's like we're fucking connected or some shit. Definitely on the same wavelength. I bet you're rolling your eyes right now," Negan smiles.

Kirsty frowns at him then turns to watch the road go by.

"Cheer up, beautiful. We're almost there," Negan says.

They pull up outside of a factory, much smaller than the sanctuary from the looks of it.

Kirsty turns to Negan. _Why would you want a base so close to the sanctuary?_ She mouths.

"I've got my reasons. As much as i like you, sweetheart. I'm not about to share them all with you. What with you hating my fucking guts," he chuckles. "You hungry?"

Kirsty shakes her head.

"Well if you get hungry, just let me know, there's food in the trunk."

Kirsty taps her fingers against the door frame as she stares out of the window.

"Well this is fucking fun," Negan frowns. He taps his own fingers against the steering wheel, chewing on the inside of his cheek. "So how's things at Alexandria?"

Kirsty stares at him. _Really?_ She raises an eyebrow.

"Yes really. Christ! You really wanna sit here in fucking silence?"

 _Well, that's not a problem for me,_ Kirsty mouths.

"Fuck that!" Negan huffs. "I fucking love talking."

 _I've noticed,_ she sneers.

"What was that? I didn't quite catch it," Negan asks.

Kirsty just smiles silently.

He bites on his bottom lip. "Why don't you tell me how you got that scar on your neck? Some kinda accident or some shit? That's why you can't talk right?"

She shifts uncomfortably, avoiding his gaze.

"Come on, i bet it makes for a good story. Let me guess, you got your head caught in a wire fence," Negan chuckles.

Kirsty pulls the handle on the door and storms out of the car, slamming the door behind her. Negan flinches slightly. She doesn't go far, leaning against the hood of the car.

"Nice going asshole," Negan scolds himself. He gives her a moment before he steps out and sits beside her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

 _I'm not upset!_ She almost spits at him before looking away.

"Clearly," he says with a hint of sarcasm. "But either way, i'm sorry. People don't call me an asshole for nothing. I'm always saying the fucking wrong shit. My mouth just fucking runs away with me, as you well know."

Kirsty smiles briefly then turns to him. _It wasn't an accident,_ she mouths, not quite looking him in the eye.

Negan's face drops. "Did..," he stops himself, figuring she'll tell him in her own time.

 _It was not long after all this started,_ she starts, meeting his gaze for a moment to make sure he's listening, or looking rather. _I came across some guys looting a store. They tried to...,_ she pauses for a moment, playing nervously with her hands. _Well, i'm sure you can guess what they tried to do. Long story short, one of them slit my throat. I should've died, but i got lucky. They ran off at the sound of gunshots, and a guy found me, acted quickly, and saved my life._

"Fuck. I'm sorry. I mean, i shouldn't have teased you in the first fucking place. But i definitely wouldn't have if i'd known that," he says sincerely. Negan sighs deeply, staring off in the distance. "That's a shitty thing to have to go through. Fucking monsters," he grimaces. "Then again, i bet you think i'm no different, right?"

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders.

"I wouldn't hurt you like that. No matter what you think of me, the things i've done, it's all for a greater purpose. I never killed someone that didn't need it."

 _Whatever helps you sleep at night,_ she mouths.

"That's not fair," Negan frowns. "I bet you told yourself the exact same fucking thing when you killed my men in their sleep, or am i wrong?"

She stares at him then shakes her head. _No, but your people don't matter to me._

"No, i bet they fucking don't. But they damn well matter to me. Rick got off lightly, you wanna think yourself lucky for that," Negan says.

 _Why did you let him off lightly?_

Negan sighs, rubbing a hand over his beard. "People are a resource. I lost a whole fuck load thanks to your man Rick. But killing all of you wouldn't change that. Makes more sense to keep you all alive. The more of you there are, the more people i have working for me."

 _So i should be thankful?_

"Well yeah, you'd fucking think so," he rolls his eyes. Negan glances towards the factory. Two walkers ramble round the corner a good distance from them. "I got it," he says, heading to the car to grab Lucille.

Kirsty watches as he swings Lucille at them, smashing their skulls to a pulp. She hadn't been there at the lineup, but she'd seen the faces of those who'd come back, and their faces had said enough. Kirsty heads back inside the car.

"Christ! I've only just had my baby cleaned," he grins, placing Lucille on the back seat.

Kirsty looks at Lucille with a grimace, then she looks at Negan. She taps his shoulder. Negan smiles at her. _Who was Lucille?_ Negan's face drops. _Daughter?_

Negan swallows deeply, his throat suddenly dry. "What makes you think Lucille was an actual person?"

 _Because i find it hard to believe that someone would name a bat, and i've seen you talking to it,_ Kirsty mouths. _And, i'm not stupid._

"It's just a fucking bat, and i don't wanna talk about it," he frowns.

 _Fine,_ Kirsty crosses her arms and gazes out of the window.

Silence ensues, and an uncomfortable one at that. After a good ten minutes, Negan rubs his temples. "She was my wife."

Kirsty turns to him, her eyes widening slightly.

"From before, my only real wife. She got sick, cancer. And she died just as the world turned to shit," he clenches his jaw, trying his best to bite back tears and failing. He turns his head quickly, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. "I don't wanna talk about it, okay. And don't you go fucking telling anyone about this."

Kirsty places her hand on his shoulder, feeling him flinch slightly at her touch. He turns to her, his eyes red. _I'm sorry,_ she mouths.

Negan stares at her and nods. "I don't know about you, but i'm fucking hungry. You want anything?" He asks as he steps out of the car.

Kirsty nods.

* * *

They had been out there a good few hours. Kirsty had attempted to stifle several yawns, before inevitably falling asleep. She'd barely slept the night before, haunted by dreams of Glenn and Abe.

Negan watched her sleeping soundly, a huge grin on his face. He found himself becoming more fascinated with her with each passing day. There was a level of pity, but that came from his own fear of what it would be like to be mute. To not have the ability to express your emotions verbally, which was pretty much the quickest and best way to get your point across. Negan figured there would be a lot more heads getting bashed in if that were the case.

A light breeze comes in through the barely open window on her side. Negan's lip curls into a smirk as something sweet hits his nose. He turns to look at her, biting on his bottom lip. Her head rests against the door, her breaths almost silent. Negan wraps his hand around the back of her headrest and inches his face close to hers. His nose almost touches her neck as he breathes deeply, taking in her scent. His eyes widen, as he suddenly feels cold metal press against his throat.

Kirsty stares at him as she holds her knife against his throat.

"Woah," Negan holds his hands up. "My bad," he attempts to smile, but Kirsty keeps the knife pressed firmly against his throat. So much so, that he feels it nick him as he speaks.

Kirsty pushes her hand forward as Negan moves his head backwards, his hands still raised. She raises an eyebrow questioningly. Negan points at the knife, not wanting to speak while she has it pressed against his Adams apple. She releases the pressure, aiming the knife a little higher.

Negan takes a deep breath. "I wasn't doing anything weird, i swear."

 _So you wasn't sniffing at my neck?_ She mouths.

"Oh, well alright. I was doing that. But only because i thought i could smell perfume, which i was right," he smiles. "You know, i'm not gonna lie, this is kinda turning me on."

Kirsty frowns at him. _There's something seriously wrong with you._

"Hey, i wasn't being fucking weird. I just, like a women that smells good, that's all. And i was curious to see if you were wearing the perfume i got you."

Kirsty slowly lowers the knife. _You do something like that again, next time i won't stop._

"I gotcha," Negan grins. He waits until she has the knife tucked back in her belt. "You _are_ wearing the perfume i got you though."

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders. _So?_

"Nothing," Negan shakes his head. "It smells nice. I should get my wives to start wearing perfume."

Kirsty rubs at her eyes. _How long was i out?_

"Not long. Probably an hour, you must've needed it," he smiles. "My men will take over soon, i'll drive you back to Alexandria once they get here."

Kirsty nods.


	7. Chapter 7

"Come on, come take a break, you earned it," Simon smiles.

Kirsty tucks her knife into her belt and makes her way over to him. She had been put on watch while the saviors made repairs to the exterior of one of their outposts. It was hot out, and her vest was already soaked to the bone. She rubbed at her head with the back of her arm, blowing upwards in an attempt to cool herself.

"Here, take this," Simon holds out a bottle of water. "It's hotter than hell out here. Go get yourself something if you're hungry," he gestures towards the back of the truck.

Kirsty grabs a sandwich from the cooler.

"Is that the last one?" A woman asks from beside her.

Kirsty shakes her head, grabbing another sandwich and passing it to her.

"Thanks," she smiles, hopping up onto the back of the truck. "Christ it's hot!" She glances at Kirsty, then pats the space beside her. "You can sit down. I won't bite."

Kirsty smiles and sits beside her, munching on her sandwich.

"You're from Alexandria, right?"

Kirsty nods, taking a drink of water and coughing slightly.

"I had a sister that was deaf. I mean, i know it's not the same, but she couldn't talk either. Born that way, poor thing. I say poor thing, she was smarter than anyone of us. It fucking sucks though, she told me often enough."

Kirsty turns to her. _You can read lips?_

"Yeah. It was fun actually. None of the others could read lips, not even my mom, bless her. So we used to have entire conversations round the dinner table. Most of them using words that'd make a sailor blush," she laughs.

Kirsty laughs in the silent way she has.

"Anyway. I just wanted to say, i don't think you're dumb or anything."

 _Thanks,_ Kirtsy nods with a smile.

"Names Arat," she holds out her hand.

Kirsty takes her hand, shaking it briefly. Kirsty, she mouths.

"Yeah, i know. Negan's taken a real shine to you," Arat laughs.

Kirsty shifts uncomfortably.

"I'm guessing you don't like him that much," Arat tilts her head. "Suppose that's fair enough on your part. He's not that bad, you just think he is cos you're on the opposite side. Both our sides lost people, but we lost more. And yet here we are, sitting side by side eating a sandwich, being civil."

 _We were trying to save our people,_ Kirsty defends herself.

"Course you were. Ain't it funny, how everyone seems to think they're doing the right thing?"

 _I get what you're saying,_ Kirsty nods.

Arat's face softens slightly. "I don't mean anything by it. That's just the way it is now. A bunch of people running around, thinking they're doing the right thing," she moves closer to Kirsty, lowering her voice. "This is between me and you. But i think the world would be much better if it didn't have men leading it. All that testosterone," she shakes her head. "They're basically leading with their dicks. Men call each other pussies like it's a bad thing. But i'll tell you this for nothing. In a world full of dicks, i'd much rather be a pussy. All you need to take a dick down is a little," Arat flicks her finger. "Knocks em off their damn feet. But a pussy? That mother fucker can take a damn pounding."

Kirsty almost chokes on her food with laughter, tears streaming down her face.

Arat giggles. "It's true though. I'd take being a pussy any day."

"Come on, ladies. Break's over," Simon shouts.

They both jump down from the truck. Arat shoulders her rifle. "You're alright. You need anything, just ask," she nods as she walks off.

* * *

The sun slowly begins to lower in the sky, the heat becoming more bearable. The saviors begin to pack up for the day, most of them chatting idly and smoking cigarettes.

Simon heads over to Kirsty. "Negan should be here soon. Just spoke to him on the radio, said he'll take you back to Alexandria."

Kirsty nods, taking a sip of water. She waves at Arat as she drives away in one of the trucks.

"Hey, new girl," someone shouts.

Kirsty turns to see David, who to be honest, she dislikes more than Negan.

"It true you can't talk?" He asks with a smile.

Kirsty nods, not really caring for where this is going.

"See," he turns to his friend. "Didn't i tell you."

His friend nods his head a little uncomfortably. "I'm John," he nods at Kirsty with a shy smile.

 _Kirsty,_ she nods. Then remembering that not everyone can read lips, she jots it down.

"Well look at that! She can write!" David laughs.

Kirsty frowns, her heart pounding against her chest.

"David, don't be such an ass. She's mute, not stupid," John says, shifting his feet uncomfortably.

Kirsty offers him a grateful smile.

"Wouldn't she make the perfect woman though? Pretty, nice package. I mean, there's plenty of pretty women around, but a woman that can't talk back? That's just fucking perfect!"

"The fuck did you just say?" Negan's raised voice comes from behind Kirsty.

"I was just joking," David laughs.

Negan stares at him, his face a bright shade of scarlet as he clenches his jaw. "Does it look like anyone's fucking laughing? Because i sure as shit ain't!"

David swallows deeply. "I'm sorry, i just-,"

"I don't give a FUCK what you was just. I hear you talk to her like that again, John here will be picking your useless good for nothing brains out of Lucille! You fucking hear me?" Negan frowns, his breath heavy.

David nods his head. "Y..yes, sir. I'm sorry, it won't happen again."

"It better fucking not. Now get the fuck outta my face, asshole," Negan grimaces.

David almost stumbles his way to his truck, his hands shaking as he starts up the engine.

"Negan, i wasn't-," John starts.

Negan cuts him off. "I know you wasn't. Make sure he stays outta my fucking way, okay?"

John nods and follows David to the truck.

Kirsty stares at Negan, and finds herself feeling something she never thought she would for him, respect.

"I'm fucking sorry about that," he turns to her, offering her a weak smile.

 _It's okay, i'm used to it,_ she shrugs her shoulders.

"No," Negan frowns. "It's not okay. Do people talk to you like that in Alexandria?"

Kirsty shifts her feet. _Not exactly like that. I guess some people feel like they're humouring me just by talking to me, i don't know._

Negan's shoulders sag. "Is that what you think of me? That i'm just.. humouring you?"

She looks up at him and shakes her head. _No, i don't._

He smiles briefly, his eyes burning deep into hers, then he turns his head. "We should get going, gonna be dark soon."

* * *

Rick watches them pull up at the gates. He's surprised when Negan drives off without getting out and taunting him.

"Kirsty, you okay?"

 _I'm fine,_ she nods.

"Daryl was looking for you earlier. I think he's going out on a hunt, wanted to know if you were interested in going with him?"

 _I'll go find him,_ she mouths.

"Sorry, i didn't catch that," Rick says apologetically.

She takes out her notepad and writes it down instead.

"Oh, i think he's at Aaron and Eric's."

Kirsty nods as she heads towards Aaron's.

* * *

"Hey!" Aaron smiles as he opens the door. "You looking for Daryl?"

Kirsty nods with a smile.

"Well, he's in there eating us out of house and home," he jokes. "You want some? There's plenty to go around."

Kirsty rubs her hands together. _Can't say no to that._

She steps into the dining room, the smell of spaghetti hitting her nose. Daryl and Eric look up as she enters.

"Kirsty!" Eric almost beams. "Feels like i haven't seen you in forever. Take a seat," he smiles, pulling out the chair between him and Daryl.

Kirsty sits down and takes a plate, filling it with spaghetti.

"Here," Daryl places his bread on her plate. "Don't say i never get you anything."

"Well that's generous. Considering you already had five rolls," Eric jests.

 _Thanks, she mouths,_ dipping the bread into her spaghetti sauce.

"You wanna come hunting later?" Daryl asks through a mouthful of spaghetti.

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders. _I'm pretty tired._

"No wonder," Daryl frowns. "Negan's working you like a dog. Anyone would think he don't have men of his own."

Aaron clears his throat. "So what are your plans for tomorrow, Kirsty?" He asks, trying to change the subject.

She takes out her notepad, writing with one hand and eating with the other. _Might go on a run. See what i can see._

"You want me to go with you?" Daryl asks, sounding a little needy.

 _I thought you were going out on a hunt? You might not be back,_ she writes.

"Aw, to hell with that. Hunting can wait," he shakes his hair away from his eyes, wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand.

 _Okay,_ Kirsty nods. _This is really good,_ she mouths to Eric.

"Oh, thank you. If only Aaron would appreciate it," he frowns in his direction.

"What? Since when do i not appreciate your cooking?" Aaron asks with a hurt look on his face.

" _You_ never compliment my cooking," he says.

Kirsty laughs silently, covering her mouth.

* * *

Daryl walks Kirsty to her house, following her onto the porch. "You want a smoke?" He offers one out to her. Kirsty takes it gratefully and sits down on the porch step. "You find out anything about Negan yet? Anything we can use?"

She shakes her head.

Daryl looks down at his feet, his hair falling over his face. "It ain't right you working with him. I wish i could do something about it. Rick ain't even close to coming up with something. If anything, he's more compliant."

 _It's alright. It's not like Negan's mistreating me,_ she writes.

Daryl frowns at her. "Almost sounds like you're defending him?"

 _I'm not. I'm just telling you how it is,_ she writes.

He looks away, exhaling the smoke from his cigarette. "Sorry, i weren't trying to sound like i thought you was warming to him."

Kirsty looks of into the distance. She wonders if Daryl would actually be right to think that. _Am i warming to him?_ She quickly puts the thought out of her head and flicks away her cigarette. _I'm gonna get some shut eye. I'll meet you out front at sunrise?_ She writes.

Daryl nods, stepping up from the porch. "Sure, i'll see you tomorrow. Night," he smiles, watching as she heads inside.


	8. Chapter 8

"Ain't nothin here but the dead," Daryl says, holding his crossbow. "Shoulda gone huntin instead."

 _No one forced you to come,_ Kirsty writes.

Daryl huffs lightly as they walk along the road of yet another derelict town. "Do you some good to spend time with your own people."

Kirsty turns to him, raising an eyebrow. _What's that supposed to mean?_ She mouths.

Daryl shakes his head. "Nothin."

A walker rambles it's way out of a run down pharmacy. Kirsty makes her way towards it, stabbing it through the head with her knife. She motions with her head for them to go inside.

"I'll go first," Daryl says, readying his crossbow.

The smell of rot and decay doesn't faze them, long since accustomed to it. There are no dead inside, but also not much in the way of supplies either. Kirsty kneels down, checking underneath the counter. She grabs two fallen bottles of painkillers and a sachet of what looks like some kind of constipation relief medicine.

"Score," Daryl says sarcastically.

 _Better than nothing,_ she mouths. _Here, you always look a little constipated,_ she teases, handing him the sachet.

"Ha ha, you should be a comedian," Daryl says before heading off to check the rest of the pharmacy. He checks under the shelves, finding a pack of condoms, some vitamins, and a couple of protein bars.

Kirsty makes her way over to him with a few more bottles of painkillers in her arms. She smiles at Daryl holding the condoms and protein bars. _You look like a man with a plan,_ she mouths.

"Shut up," Daryl says, dropping his head in hopes his hair will cover the fact that he's blushing.

They head outside, Daryl taking out two of the dead with his crossbow. "Don't look like there's much worth takin. Should head back."

Kirsty shakes her head. _Let's keep on. At least check the rest of this town out,_ she writes.

They go from building to building, not finding much in the way of supplies. Kirsty almost admits defeat until they find a warehouse on the edge of the town. The doors are chained and the familiar sound of the dead comes from within.

See, told you we should check out the rest of this town, she writes.

Daryl looks the warehouse over cautiously. "I don't know. Sounds like there's a few of em in there. Might not even be worth it, could be empty?"

 _You scared?_ She mouths with a smile.

"No, but it'd be stupid to risk our lives for what could be nothing," he says.

 _Why don't we just cut the chains, make some noise, then hide out for a bit? Dead might not even see us?_ Kirsty writes.

Daryl huffs. "Alright, but if they see us, get ready to haul ass back to the truck."

He takes out his bolt cutters and removes the chain. The pair of them bang against the doors, making as much noise as they can, then they run off, keeping within sight of the doors.

The dead make their way out of the warehouse, going off in different directions. Luckily for Daryl and Kirsty, they don't head their way. They wait a good twenty minutes before heading back to the doors.

"I don't like this. I can still hear em in there," Daryl frowns as he looks at Kirsty, hoping she'll agree with him.

She shrugs as she goes to head inside.

"Hey," Daryl grabs at her arm. "You listenin to me or what?"

Kirsty grabs her pad. _You've got my back, right? First sign of trouble, we run._

Daryl sighs, his shoulders dropping. "Alright," he nods, taking his bow from his shoulder.

They head inside, the darkness made all that more unnerving by the groans and snarls. Kirsty grabs her flashlight.

"I don't think there's as many as i thought. Just sounds more," Daryl whispers, feeling relieved.

Kirsty nods in agreement. Her eyes light up as she shines her torch over shelves filled with plastic boxes.

"Probably caught on somethin," Daryl adds.

Kirsty nudges him and shines her torch in the direction of the boxes.

Daryl heads over. "Hell yeah!" He watches as Kirsty shines the torch over rows and rows of makeshift shelves filled with boxes full of food. "Next time i say somethin might not be worth it, smack me upside the head. Honey, pasta, peanut butter, powdered milk. This shit lasts forever. We'll take what we can, come back for the rest."

Kirsty nods. She shines the torch on her pad. _What do you think happened? All this stuff just lying here untouched, it's weird, right? What if this is someone's stash?_

Daryl nods. "It could be, can see light comin through over there, that's probably how the walkers got in. Maybe whoever left this here is long gone? Don't really matter, it's ours now."

 _We should clear out the rest of the dead,_ she writes.

Daryl nods. "Come on."

They find four walkers trapped beneath some fallen shelves. Daryl takes them out with his crossbow without breaking a sweat.

 _You get the truck and bring it out front, i'll have a nose around,_ Kirsty writes.

"Ain't stupid are ya, got me running round while you go window shopping," Daryl smiles.

She laughs silently, slapping his shoulder. Daryl heads off and Kirsty takes a look around. She takes the lid off a box and grabs a jar of peanut butter. Kirsty spoons it out with her fingers. She eats about half a jar before she hears a snarl from behind her. Kirsty spins round but the walker knocks her off her feet. She falls, her thigh catching on the sharp edge of a fallen shelf. Kirsty hisses at the sharp pain in her thigh, but it's dulled by her fear off the walker currently trying to take a chunk out of her. Her fear is only made worse by the fact that she can barely see, her flashlight off in the distance. She pushes at the corpse, her fingers sliding inside it's rotten ribcage. _Shit!_ Kirsty manages to roll it off herself. She takes her knife and stabs blindly, not stopping until longer after it's silenced. She leans against a shelf, her breath heavy, skin slick with sweat.

"I can smell peanut butter, you open it without me?" Daryl jokes as he heads inside the warehouse. "Kirsty?" He sees her torch on the floor, then he hears her breaths. "Kirsty!" He yells, kneeling down in front of her. He shines his light on her face.

 _I'm okay,_ she mouths.

Daryl lowers the torch and sees the blood on her thigh. His face drops and his jaw begins to tremble slightly. The only thing going through his mind is that he won't be able to cut it off. His vision becomes blurry as his eyes connect with hers.

Kirsty slaps his arm. _I'm not bit,_ she mouths.

Daryl wipes at his eyes. "What?"

 _I'm, not, bit,_ she mouths again.

"You sure?" He asks, his voice shaky.

Kirsty nods, pointing to the sharp edge of the shelf.

Daryl breathes a huge sigh of relief. "Scared the hell outta me," Daryl takes a rag from his back pocket and ties it round her leg. "Come on," he wraps his arm around her waist, helping Kirsty to her feet. "I'll lock this place up, get some people to come back later."

* * *

They pull up at Alexandria, and to their surprise, Negan's truck is outside the gate.

"What the hell?" Daryl frowns. "Can't this asshole take a hint? Guess you won't be working for him for a while now anyway, least that's somethin."

Kirsty gets out of the truck, but not before Daryl rushes over to her side, wrapping his arm around her waist once again. _I can manage,_ she mouths. Though when she does try to fully support herself she winces.

"Stop tryna be all tough," Daryl smiles.

Rick opens the gate with Negan beside him. Rick notices Kirsty's leg, but before he can say anything, Negan interrupts him.

"What the fuck happened?" He asks worriedly. Negan stares at her, his face dropping. "Have you-,"

"She's fine," Daryl cuts him off.

Negan stares at him coldly. "I wasn't talking to you, i was talking to Kirsty, and she doesn't look fucking _fine_ to me!" He snaps.

Kirsty snaps her fingers, and Negan looks in her direction. _Seriously, Negan. I'm fine. I fell and cut it that's all. Hurts a bit though,_ she mouths.

Negan nods and makes his way over to her, pulling her away from Daryl.

"Hey, i got her," Daryl frowns, his hand not moving from her waist.

Negan stands in front of him. "Doesn't seem to me like you've fucking got her. Where the fuck were you when she cut her damn leg? Now be a good boy, and fuck off, okay?"

Daryl goes to open his mouth.

"Daryl!" Rick shouts. "Come on, she's fine, i need your help with something."

Daryl stares at Negan once more before heading towards the gate.

Negan turns to Kirsty. "Come on, i'll take you to the infirmary," he smiles.

* * *

 _Told you it's barely a scratch,_ Kirsty mouths.

Negan frowns. "It's not a fucking scratch if you need stitches. Where the fuck was Daryl while you were almost having your damn face chewed off?"

 _It's not his fault, i should've been paying attention. Too busy eating peanut butter,_ she smiles.

Negan bites on his bottom lip. "I think you should come back to the sanctuary."

 _What?_ She frowns.

"You're not fucking safe here, you'll be safe there, my people can protect you," Negan says.

 _Negan,_ she mouths, but he takes no notice.

"And who the fuck does he think he is? Fucking talking back to me like that. I ain't fucking leaving here till i know you're safe. I mean, what if that had been a fucking bite?"

 _Negan,_ she repeats once again.

"Look, i know it'll take some getting used to. But you'll like it at the sanctuary-,"

Kirsty grabs his arm, her face stern. _You're stifling me, Negan! Don't talk over me like everyone else does. Like what i have to say doesn't matter just cos i don't have a voice._

His face drops. "I'm sorry."

 _You should be. You really think i'd want to live at the sanctuary? I don't even like you._

Negan throws her a hurt look. "You don't like me?"

She stares at him bemused. _No, i can't fucking stand you,_ but her expression says otherwise, and Negan doesn't fail to notice.

Negan runs a hand over his face. "Look, whatever the fuck you think about me, i like you. Not just because you're hot, because you are unbelievably fucking hot. But because you're fucking awesome. And, i didn't mean to fucking stifle you. I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all."

Kirsty gives him a sideways glance, trying not to smile. _This is nothing,_ she points to her thigh. _I've been through much worse._

"I know, doesn't mean i have to fucking like it though," he frowns.

 _You don't have to like it. But i'll tell you this for nothing, there's no way on this earth that i'd come live at the sanctuary. These are my people, Negan. I don't like your people._

"Well that's a damn shame, because they sure as shit seem to like you," he smiles. "What's the fucking deal with Daryl anyway?"

 _What do you mean?_

Negan laughs. "Oh come on, it's fucking obvious he likes you. Asshole looked all fucking puppy eyed and shit."

 _Don't be ridiculous!_

"Kirsty, i'm a guy, okay. I know this shit. Dude's got a major fucking crush on you."

 _Crush? What are you, twelve?_

"No," he chuckles. "But i think crush is the perfect word for Daryl. When you're at that age were you start to like girls, but your dick doesn't know it yet so you just wanna hold fucking hands or some shit. That's fucking Daryl all over."

 _Shut up,_ she says, trying not to smile. _Daryl and i are like family._

"So you got him in the friendzone, owch," Negan laughs.

 _Why are you even here?_

Negan smiles at her. "Honestly, i fucking missed you."

Kirsty rolls her eyes.

"I guess i won't be seeing you for a while now," he frowns.

 _I wouldn't say that,_ she shakes her head. _This is nothing, i can still walk._

"I know, but out there you have to run. I'll give you some time to heal, don't want your stitches bursting."

Kirsty nods.

"I guess i'll see you next time i do a pick-up," he bites on his lip.

 _Probably._

Negan gets up from his seat. "I'll look forward to it."

 _I won't._

He chuckles lightly. "Course you won't."


	9. Chapter 9

Kirsty rides in the truck with Dwight. It had been two weeks since her run with Daryl, and her leg had healed just fine. Negan had been on his usual pick up the day before, and even though he'd insisted she should rest, Kirsty had assured him she was more than capable of working with his men.

 _Where we heading?_ She writes.

"Not far," Dwight says, keeping his eyes on the road. "Same as last time, Negan wants you on lookout."

Kirsty nods, drumming her fingers against the door.

After another twenty minutes of driving they pull up beside another truck. The saviors are already running round like worker bees.

Kirsty steps out giving the area a quick scan. It always amazes her to see a group of people work so hard. Her people at Alexandria are good people, but not all of them are so keen to get their hands dirty. It irritates the shit out of her, because if they all worked as hard as this, then they would probably have eliminated the saviors by now.

"Hey," Negan smiles, heading her way.

 _I didn't know you were here,_ she mouths.

"Sorry, have i just ruined your fucking day?" He chuckles.

Kirsty rolls her eyes with a smile. _Where do you want me?_

Negan drops his eyes to below his belt then looks her straight in the eye, licking his lips. He goes to open his mouth before she points a finger at him.

 _Don't.. even think about it._

Negan laughs. "Come on, this way," he nods.

* * *

Kirsty plunges her knife into the walkers head. There had been surprisingly few considering the amount of noise they were making, what with the heavy machinery.

"Come on, take five," Simon nods in her direction.

Kirsty leans against a truck, taking her rucksack from her shoulders. She grabs a bottle of water, taking a drink.

"You hungry?" Negan asks.

She shakes her head. _I'm good._ Normally Kirsty felt awkward mouthing words, but with Negan understanding almost every word she said, she'd become more comfortable with it.

"Yes you are," he grins. "Your leg alright?"

 _It's fine,_ she pats at her thigh.

"Good, because if you feel like you gotta take a rest or whatever, just let me know," he nods sincerely. "Anyway, beautiful, i got shit to do," Negan turns his head as another truck arrives. "Joe! What took you so damn long?" He frowns at the guy stepping out of the truck.

"Sorry, came across the dead on our way here. Had some fun putting em down though, sorry bastards," he laughs.

Kirsty's blood turns to ice. Her heart pounds in her chest as she looks over towards the truck, her eyes widening.

"Yeah, i'm fucking sure you did. But we got people waiting," Negan says.

"Sorry, boss. I'll get right on it," Joe says. "Hey, what's her problem?" He nods in Kirsty's direction. "She alright?"

Negan raises an eyebrow then looks behind him. He frowns as he sees Kirsty staring over at them, her face pale. Negan walks over to her. "Hey, you alright? You look like you've seen a ghost," he places a hand against her shoulder. "Jesus Christ! You're shaking," he leans down, levelling with her eyes.

Kirsty clenches her jaw trying to bite back tears. She meets Negan's gaze and sees genuine concern in it.

"You don't look so good, sweetheart, and that's fucking saying something," he half smiles. "What is it? You feeling sick?"

Kirsty shakes her head, tears spilling down her cheeks.

Negan wipes at them with the thumb of his gloved hand. "Hey, come on," he says softly. "You're fucking scaring me."

She looks up at Negan, her bottom lip trembling as she opens her mouth. _It.. it's him._

"What's him? What the fuck are you talking about, sweetheart?"

 _Him!_ She snarls, which Negan picks up on in spite of her lack of vocals. _He's the one who.. almost killed me.. who tried to.._

Negan's eyes widen. "Wait, what? Are you saying that's the guy who did that?" He points at the scar on her neck.

Kirsty looks him in the eye briefly then nods.

He strokes her cheek with his thumb. "Are you sure?"

 _Yes, i'll never forget his face, or his laugh._

Negan grinds his teeth as he strokes her cheek. He nods and spins on his heels.

"She alright?" Joe asks.

But Negan walks straight past him, heading for his own truck. He grabs Lucille from the passenger seat and makes his way back to Joe. Negan draws his gun and shoots him in the knee. Joe falls to the ground screaming, clutching at his leg. Negan's men turn in unison, their work temporarily forgotten. Negan holsters his gun, Lucille swinging idly in his gloved hand.

"Ahh, what the hell?" Joe grimaces, sweat pouring down his face.

Negan stands in front of him, his face stern. "You know her?" Negan points Lucille towards Kirsty.

"What? No! I don't know her!" Joe cries, his breath heavy.

Negan looks down at him, clenching his jaw. "Oh i think you fucking do. Come here, Kirsty," Negan gestures with his head.

Kirsty shakily makes her way over, standing beside Negan.

"You telling me you don't fucking know her?" Negan asks again.

"No! I don't! I've never seen her before!" Joe yells, baring his teeth with the pain.

Negan draws his gun once again and shoots at Joe's other knee. Joe screams out once again as he lays back against the ground. "Fuck!"

"Take a good look at her! And tell me that you don't fucking know her!" Negan almost roars, the veins popping out of his neck.

Joe tries to catch his breath as the world around him begins to spin. He pushes himself up onto his elbows, trying to focus his eyes on her. After thirty seconds his eyes widen. "Hey, wait," he stares at her confused. He does know her, but the girl standing in front of him must be a ghost, because by rights she should be dead. "I.. i think i remember her."

"Really?" Negan snarls. "And where the fuck would that be from?"

Joe opens his mouth, panic well and truly setting in. "I.. i can't remember," he stutters.

Negan points Lucille at him. "Yes you fucking do!"

"Negan, i'm sorry, okay. I didn't-,"

"Don't talk to me! Talk to fucking her!" Negan yells.

Joe looks at her. He searches his mind for the right thing to say, something to get him out of this alive. "I remember, i do. It weren't my idea, i swear. I just wanted your stuff, that's all. It was the others. I told em not to, but they didn't listen. Those guys were crazy. I cut loose not long after that, couldn't live with it," he rambles.

"Was he the one that did it?" Negan asks her.

Kirsty turns to him feeling much calmer. _Yes._

All Negan can see is red. He holds Lucille as if his life depends on it, his knuckles turning white. He turns to Kirsty. She no longer looks afraid. Though her breath is still heavy, Negan knows very well the look she's giving Joe. Negan would love nothing more than to smash Joe's brains in, but this isn't about what _he_ wants, it's about her. He lifts Lucille and holds her out to Kirsty.

She looks at Negan, unsure of what he means by this gesture. But her eyes widen as she meets his gaze. She understands fully. Kirsty looks down at her, this thing that killed her friends, her _family_. She reaches out a hand to touch her and Lucille is surprisingly warm against her fingers. Kirsty curls her fingers around Lucille, taking her from Negan.

He watches her holding Lucille in her hands and he likes what he sees. She holds her as if she's not just an inanimate object. Maybe not seeing her the same way _he_ does, but perhaps an extension of herself.

Kirsty turns Lucille over in her hands. Her mind races pulling her in a thousand directions all at once.

"Hey, what you doin?" Joe frowns.

Kirsty lifts her gaze from Lucille, her eyes suddenly void of emotion.

"Please don't, i'm sorry okay, i didn't mean to. Please! I'm sorry," he pleads with her.

 _I forgive you,_ she mouths. He looks up at her, a wave of relief hitting him, right before Lucille does as Kirsty swings her hard at the side of his head knocking him on his side. He lets out a tortured gargle before she brings Lucille down again, the sickening sound of his skull cracking filling the ears of those nearby. Kirsty doesn't hear it, she only hears his voice as he taunts her, holding the knife against her throat. She hears her own voice pleading with him, begging him not to hurt her. His laugh as he slits her throat, and then her own tortured gargles as she clutches at her neck, blood pouring through her fingers. Now who's laughing? She thinks, as she brings the bat down again and again, his face nothing more than mush, his hand going through it's final twitches as he ceases to exist.

Negan watches in awe, his eyes alight. She finally stops, her breath heavy, Lucille dripping with blood as she hangs from Kirsty's arm. She turns to him, a crazed look in her eyes and for a moment she appears to be smiling. Her eyes widen briefly, perhaps as the gravity of the situation dawns on her. Kirsty hands Lucille back to him and he accepts her with a smile. "Dwight, have Lucille cleaned up for me. I want her looking brand new by the time i get back to the sanctuary," he holds her out to him.

Dwight walks over cautiously, briefly glancing at Kirsty. "Sure thing, Negan," he nods as he takes Lucille from him.

"Everyone get back to work," Negan orders. And no sooner has he said it than they're back to being busy bees. Negan looks down at Kirsty. "You okay?"

She nods, not looking at him, her eyes glued to the body in front of her. Kirsty had killed a lot of people since the world had turned to shit, but this was different, it felt different. Every time she'd ended someone's life it had been them or her, or for the good of the group. But this had been on her terms. She hadn't needed to do it, but she'd wanted to and she didn't regret it either. It felt.. good.

"Come on," Negan takes her gently by the arm. "Let's get the fuck outta here."


	10. Chapter 10

Kirsty looks over at Negan as they drive down the road. She places a hand on his arm. _Stop the truck,_ she mouths as he turns to her.

Negan pulls over to the side of the road switching off the engine. "You alright?" Kirsty silences him with a kiss, Negan's eyes widening in surprise. Their lips linger a few moments, a shiver runs down his spine as her fingers brush his neck. He looks deep in her eyes before his lips collide with hers, not wanting to give her time to regret it, his hand running through her hair.

Kirsty wraps her arms around his neck as she sits astride him. She fumbles with the zip on his jacket, running kisses over his neck as he groans beneath her. His fingers grasp her waist as he lays her down on the front seat, taking off his jacket and tossing it on the floor. She'd moan if she could, but all she lets out is a series of hot breaths as he traces kisses over her collarbone.

Negan pulls her vest over her head, he trails kisses over her stomach as he unclasps her bra, clawing at her waist as she writhes beneath him. Kirsty tugs at his shirt as he unbuttons her jeans, she shuffles them off and unbuckles his belt eagerly, her breath heavy. He tucks his fingers inside her panties pulling them off impatiently. Negan groans at the sight of her as she lies in front of him with her legs spread.

Kirsty stretches out an arm tugging at the waistband of his pants and pulling him onto her. She throws her head back taking in a sharp breath as he slides inside her, her fingers clawing at his shoulders as he lets out a deep groan. Kirsty rolls her hips beneath him needily, her foot pushing against the steering wheel for purchase.

"Fuck!" Negan groans as she grinds against him. He slowly moves his hips, wanting more than anything to fuck the shit out of her, but not certain that he'll last. Negan looks down at her as he builds a slow rhythm. In all his years of having sex he'd never experienced anything like this before. With other women it was as simple as, _if the neighbours can hear her then you're doing it right_. Negan can do no such thing with Kirsty so he takes it slow, her hot breaths against his skin sending shivers all the way to his throbbing cock. He caresses her neck, groaning as she lifts her hips up to meet his.

Kirsty bites on his bottom lip, her hands running through the back of his hair as he slowly thrusts into her, his hips rolling against hers creating a beautiful friction. She mouths his name against his lips, her thighs tightening against his waist. Her body breaks out in gooseflesh as he ghosts his lips along her collarbone, nipping and sucking on her sensitive skin.

"Oh, Kirsty," Negan groans against her ear as he grabs her thigh, resting her leg over his shoulder as he thrusts into her. He can't take his eyes off her. Her silence only makes her more endearing as Negan is mesmerised by every breath or movement she makes.

 _Negan,_ she mouths once again, and Christ he wishes he could hear her. His lips brush against hers as he builds up a steady rhythm. She runs her hand through his hair, her eyes burning deep into his. _Fuck me!_ She mouths, her eyes pleading with him.

"Oh fuck yeah!" Negan growls as he snaps his hips against her hard. He tucks his arm under her shoulder, grasping at it as he thrusts into her relentlessly. "Fuck! You're so wet, baby," he groans, his cock twitching inside her as he struggles to hold back.

Her breaths are erratic as she scratches at his back. She bites his shoulder as she stifles what would be a moan if she were able, her legs beginning to shake as she feels herself getting close.

Negan quickens his pace as he feels her trembling beneath him, his fingers no doubt leaving marks on her thigh as he claws at her. He makes enough noise for the both of them, grunting and groaning with almost every thrust.

 _Oh god, Negan,_ Kirsty throws her head back as she orgasms, her toes curling as waves of pleasure course through her entire body.

Negan groans as she pulsates around him. He looks down at Kirsty, her mouth wide open as she lets out an almost audible aah sending him over the edge as his cock spasms inside her. He groans into the crook of her neck as he loses his rhythm, coming inside her with a few haphazard thrusts.

They lie a while their breaths heavy. Kirsty runs a hand down his back, his chest hair tickling her breasts as he struggles to catch his breath. He lifts his head from the crook of her neck gazing down at her. "Fuck, baby!" He smiles from ear to ear. "That was fucking incredible. You fucking took me by surprise there. This was the last thing i was expecting to happen." Kirsty looks up at him with a shy smile. "I can't fucking tell you how much-."

Kirsty covers his mouth with her hand. _Don't ruin it,_ she mouths. Negan frowns briefly but then he nods with a grin. Kirsty pushes at his chest as she sits up, trying to find her clothes as she suddenly becomes more aware that she's completely naked.

"You know, i'll be good to go again in about five minutes," Negan smiles, his eyes looking at her greedily.

She shakes her head as she pulls on her panties.

Negan sighs. "Is this gonna be one of those things were you're not gonna talk to me for the next week? Because normally i wouldn't fucking mind, but i like you."

 _I just spoke to you,_ she frowns as she fastens her bra.

Negan furrows his brow. "Well you said three fucking words, and they were, don't ruin it, which isn't very promising."

Kirsty buttons her jeans and grabs her vest, she scrambles for her boots on the floor. Fully dressed she turns to Negan, who's dick is still hanging out of his pants. _Are you going to get dressed?_ She asks, averting her eyes quickly.

Negan looks down at himself. "No need to be shy, beautiful. This was inside you not five minutes ago. My manfat's probably pooling in your panties as we speak," he teases.

 _You're not funny,_ she frowns.

"I'm not fucking joking," he smiles, running his tongue over his lips.

 _Can we just get going?_ She mouths.

Negan chuckles. "If that's how you want it?" He wipes at the windscreen in front of him. "Christ! It's gotten steamy in here," he laughs as he winds down the window.

Kirsty winds down her own window, a warm breeze blowing against her hot skin.

They drive on in silence, Negan not wanting to push his luck. He stops the truck about a mile from Alexandria. Kirsty turns to him. Why have you stopped?

Negan breathes deeply as he drums his fingers against the steering wheel. "I don't wanna leave _us_ like this. I'm not gonna lie, sweetheart, what just happened, i've wanted that from the moment i laid eyes on you. It was fucking amazing and i know for a fucking fact you feel the same. I just wish you didn't feel the need to mope around feeling bad about it."

 _I'm not moping,_ she frowns.

Negan laughs. "No, course you're not. You might wanna tell your fucking face that then," his face softens. "A lot's happened today. What you did to Joe," Negan shakes his head. "Don't go feeling bad about that, he had it fucking coming. I'll give you some time, i don't want you to feel like you're suffocating," he tilts his head to the side. "If you need me for anything, you find one of my men and they'll get me on the radio." He really wants to kiss her, but he doesn't, her face telling him that's the last thing she wants. So he drives on.

* * *

"I ain't takin his word for it! Why should we believe a word that comes out his mouth?" Daryl yells.

"Daryl, will you just calm down," Rick says.

"Naw. He ain't nothin but a traitor, i ain't takin his word for nothin."

"Hey, i'm just telling you what i saw. You don't believe me? Then fine," Dwight says.

The three of them stand in the dark of night outside a dilapidated gas station, the air still hot with barely a breeze.

"We're not saying that," Rick starts.

"Yeah we are!" Daryl cuts him off. "I don't care what you say, i ain't believin it."

"I saw it with my own eyes, as did all the others," Dwight says.

Daryl huffs. "Well so what if she did? Guy had it comin if what you said's right."

"If she'd just shot him i'd agree with you. But what she did was cold. If you'd been there you'd have said that yourself. She took that bat and she smashed that guys head in till it was nothin more than mush, and she loved every second of it," Dwight says.

Daryl goes to run at him before Rick puts a hand against his chest. "Daryl," Rick shakes his head. "Why would he lie? What would he have to gain?"

Daryl shuffles from one foot to the other. "She wouldn't touch that thing, i know she wouldn't."

Rick places a hand on his shoulder looking him in the eye. "Maybe she wasn't thinking straight? I mean, that was the guy that almost killed her, that left her for dead, the guy that stole her voice."

Daryl nods, giving Dwight a nasty glance. "I still don't see why we can't tell her bout Dwight. Feels wrong, like we don't trust her."

"We don't," Dwight chips in.

"Was i talkin to you?" Daryl snaps.

"Hey, calm down," Rick says, pulling him back once again. He sighs deeply. "I think Dwight's right though."

"What?" Daryl frowns.

"I'm not saying she's on Negan's side, but i can't risk it," Rick says.

"That's exactly what you're sayin, how can you think that about her?"

"I think because she just bashed some guys head in with the same weapon that killed your friends," Dwight sneers.

"Didn't i tell you to shut the hell up? You ain't a part of this!" Daryl shouts. He turns to Rick. "She ain't switchin sides."

Rick nods. "I'm not saying she is, Daryl. But we need to be careful. The less she knows the better it is for her. She has to work with them, it'll be much easier if she doesn't have to keep stuff from them."

Daryl frowns. "Alright, but i don't like it."

* * *

Kirsty steps out of the shower. She'd been under there for a good twenty minutes but she could still smell Negan on herself. Kirsty guessed it was probably in her head, guilt from sleeping with the enemy. _What the hell were you thinking?_ She scolds herself.

"Kirsty?" Daryl shouts from the bottom of the stairs. She steps out on the landing in just her towel. Daryl's eyes widen briefly before he looks away, his cheeks going red. "Oh, sorry. Didn't know you were in the shower." Kirsty clicks her fingers and he nervously looks up at her, trying his best not to let his eyes drop from her face.

 _What's up?_ She mouths.

"Nothin," he shakes his head, glancing down at his feet. "Just seein if you were hungry, brought some food over," Daryl nods towards the kitchen. "Aaron made too much."

 _I'll be down in five,_ she mouths.

* * *

They sit side by side near the kitchen counter, Kirsty wolfing her food down.

Daryl smiles. "Looks like you worked up an appetite."

Kirsty looks up from her plate, briefly horrified by how accurate his words are. She nods with a smile. _Yeah, i'm starving._

"How's it goin out there?"

Kirsty shrugs. _Same, they had me on watch._

Daryl looks at her thoughtfully as she eats her food. He wants more than anything to ask her about Joe, but knows there would be no logical explanation for how he knows about it. "You know you can tell me anythin, right?"

Kirsty turns to him. _What's brought that on?_

"Nothin, it's just.. i don't see much of you lately, that's all. I care about you," he says shyly, his hair falling over his face. "Don't want you thinkin you're on your own. I'm always here."

Kirsty puts her hand on his arm. _Thanks,_ she smiles sweetly.

* * *

As she lies in bed in the early hours all she can see is Joe's face as she raises Lucille. She tosses and turns as she tries to get to sleep. Kirsty thinks of Negan instead. She doesn't want to but it's better than thinking about Joe. Though it had been over in less than fifteen minutes it had definitely been memorable. _It can't happen again, it won't!_ She assures herself before finally drifting off to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

"Oh, fuck! That's it, baby," Negan groans, his breath heavy.

"Negan," Frankie moans beneath him.

Negan loses his rhythm as he glances down at her. He covers her mouth with his hand and picks up the pace again. Burying his head in the crook of her neck he thrusts into her relentlessly, her breath hot against his hand. His eyes closed, he pictures Kirsty. "Fuck!" He growls as he shoots his load inside her. Before he gets the chance to catch his breath he rolls off Frankie, laying on his back.

"I don't like it when you do that," Frankie says.

Negan turns to her, his chest rising and falling heavily. "Do what?"

"Cover my mouth like that. You never used to do that, i thought you liked your women loud?"

"Times change, sweetheart. Either get with the fucking programme or get the fuck outta my bed," Negan says.

Frankie huffs as she gets up and goes to the bathroom.

"Don't be in there all fucking day, i've got shit to do!" He shouts after her.

* * *

Negan stares at Arat, his eyes focusing on her mouth. "Did you just tell me to go fuck myself?"

Arat laughs as she leans back against her chair. "Very good," she smiles. "I don't think you need my help anymore."

"I know, but it doesn't hurt to practice, and i've been rewarding you greatly, have i not?" He smiles.

"Yes, you have. But you're learning quicker than i did," Arat says.

"I just don't want her to say something and i just fucking stand there like an idiot not having a clue what she's said. If she takes that fucking pen out around me then i'll feel like i've fucking failed," he says.

"You really like her, don't you?" Arat smiles.

"Well yeah, it's not ever day a guy goes out his way to learn to read lips. But it's not just about that. She's a fucking badass, and i want her on my fucking team. And.. it's the decent fucking thing to do. I can't believe Rick's never learned to do it, fucking asshole," Negan frowns.

"She'd make a great savior," Arat says.

Negan smiles. "She would wouldn't she."

"You're forgetting one thing though."

"What's that?" Negan asks.

"She's already team Rick. Do you really think she'd go against her own?"

Negan lets out a tsk as he chews on his lip. "I guess we'll have to wait and fucking see."

* * *

Kirsty walks quietly through the woods attempting to follow a trail, but her mind is elsewhere. It had been four days since she'd last seen Negan, yet she couldn't stop thinking about it. His hands all over her, his eyes burning into hers.

Daryl watches her from afar as she wanders off the trail he left for her. He frowns, stepping out in front of her.

Kirsty jumps a mile. _Jesus, Daryl! You scared the shit outta me!_ She places a hand against her chest.

"Trail ended over there," he points.

Kirsty turns around looking down at the ground. She takes out her pen. _I told you i was no good at this._

"Wouldn't say that, you were doin well. You got somethin on your mind?"

 _Haven't we all?_ She mouths.

"You wanna see if we can catch somethin? Sounds like there's plenty out here," he offers.

Kirsty shrugs. _Maybe we should head back?_ She writes.

"I'll show you how to use my crossbow," he offers with a smile.

Kirsty smiles. _Alright then, you've twisted my arm,_ she writes.

They walk on a while, expecting to find some squirrel. But Daryl smiles as he sees a trail.

"See that," he whispers. "Looks like a deer," he points at the ground. "Not far either."

And he's right, as only five minutes later they're standing only a few feet away from the deer in question. Daryl takes the crossbow from his shoulder, but before he hands it to her he stops, his eyes squinting.

Kirsty looks at Daryl, confused, then she takes out her gun. Daryl takes his hand and lowers her gun gently, shaking his head. "She's pregnant, ain't right to shoot em when they're carryin," he says. Kirsty smiles at him sweetly. "What?" He frowns as he looks at her.

 _You're sweet,_ she mouths with a smile.

Daryl laughs, a blush covering his cheeks. "Shut up," he says before walking back the way they came.

* * *

Kirsty holds the crossbow, aiming it towards a makeshift target Daryl had made on a tree.

"You're holdin it wrong, need to hold it higher than that. Here, let me show you," he steps behind her pushing her arms up. "Like that," Kirsty's arms begin to shake. Daryl holds her arms up firmly as he stands behind her.

She shoots, the arrow barely centimeters from hitting the target. Kirsty turns to Daryl. _That was pretty good for my first try, right?_

Daryl looks down at her with a smile. "Yeah, not bad," he clears his throat, shifting his feet uncomfortably. "You hungry?"

Kirsty nods. _Starving._

"I've got some squirrel in my backpack, could cook us some up right here if you want?"

Kirsty laughs silently. _I'm sure you pull those squirrels out your ass, you always seem to have them,_ she writes.

"Naw, i'm just that good," he smiles. "Come on, i'll show you how to cut em up."

* * *

They sit side by side, chewing on their freshly cooked squirrel.

 _It's good,_ she mouths through a mouthful of food.

"Anythins good if you're hungry enough." He watches her as she eats, taking a sip of water between bites. Quit starin at her! Daryl scolds himself before going back to his food. "I guess Negan finally took the hint that he weren't welcome."

Kirsty coughs, struggling to swallow her food at the mention of his name. _I guess so,_ she mouths before spooning another piece of meat into her mouth.

"I don't know why Rick don't just take him out?"

Kirsty grabs her pad. _Because killing him doesn't end it, that's why,_ she writes.

"We don't know that, maybe the saviors would be too busy fighting each other over who's gonna be in charge next? At the least it'd buy us some time."

Kirsty shakes her head. _Negan has some really bad people working for him, you really want guys like that running around unchecked? There'd be a brief power struggle then chaos, most likely,_ she writes.

Daryl frowns. "So you think the saviors are better with Negan leading them?"

Kirsty shrugs. _It's not exactly an ideal situation with them, but i think if the wrong guy got in charge over there it could be much worse,_ she writes.

"You know much about the people that work for him?" He asks, thinking about Joe.

Kirsty shakes her head. _Just hearsay,_ she mouths.

"Well if it's just hearsay then what's to say it ain't bullshit?"

Daryl flinches as Kirsty tosses her pot on the floor and stands in front of him. _There something you wanna say? What's with all the damn questions?_ She mouths angrily. He looks up at her like a dog that's just been whipped. Her face drops. _I'm sorry,_ she rubs at her temples. _I'm just tired, maybe we should head back?_

Daryl nods. "It's alright, i didn't mean anythin by it. I just want them gone, that's all."

Kirsty places a hand on his shoulder. _I know._

* * *

They head back to Alexandria and Daryl's eyes widen as he sees Negan's truck parked outside the gates.

"Hell does he want?" Daryl almost spits.

Rick slides the gate open. "He wants you," he nods at Kirsty.

"Thought he'd got the message that he weren't welcome here?" Daryl frowns.

"Daryl," Rick scolds him. "She works for him, that was the deal, you know that. I suggest you stay here with me till he's gone," Rick turns to Kirsty. "He's waiting at your place."

They watch her walk off. "You didn't tell her about Dwight did you?" Rick turns to Daryl.

"No, i didn't. We need to make a damn move though, i don't like her being in the dark with all this," Daryl says.

* * *

Kirsty steps through her front door. She turns her head towards the kitchen and then the living room finding them both empty. She stands there puzzled, that is until she hears footsteps from above her. Kirsty races up the stares and swings open her bedroom door furiously. She sees Negan rooting through her underwear drawer. He looks over at her, a pair of panties in his hand and a huge smile on his face.

 _What the hell are you doing?_ She mouths.

"Don't stand there judging me, i got fucking bored, i've been waiting for over an hour," he swings her panties round his finger. "Thought i'd kill some time."

She steps over to him, grabbing her underwear and stuffing it back in the drawer. _Don't go through my stuff!_

Negan tilts his head then rolls his eyes. "You're so uptight," he sighs, making his way over to her bed and dropping down on it.

 _What are you doing here?_

"I wanted to see if you were alright," he says. Kirsty raises an eyebrow questioningly. "Alright, i fucking missed you. And i don't wanna sound like a chick but, you haven't called me."

Kirsty stares at him confused. _How the fuck would i call you?_

"You know what i fucking mean. You haven't tried to get in touch, i'm fucking hurt," Negan pouts.

 _Get off my bed,_ she frowns.

"Why? You worried you might jump on me if i lie here any longer?" He teases.

 _I'm not joking Negan, what happened between us was a mistake._

Negan stares at her, a hurt look on his face. "Don't say that, it was fucking amazing. You can't tell me you didn't feel the same way."

 _It was sex, nothing more._

Negan licks his lips. "Really fucking good sex though. Come on, Kirsty, take that stick out your ass."

 _I don't have a stick up my ass,_ she sneers.

"Come the fuck here then," Negan pats the bed.

 _Get out of my room, what if someone sees you up here?_

Negan gets up from the bed and stands in front of her. "You know, all this playing hard to get shit just makes me want you more."

 _Stop it, Negan._

He lets out a deep breath, running a hand over his stubble. "Alright. Have it your way," he moves his face close to hers, their noses almost touching. "But i will have you again," he almost whispers, his breath hot against her skin. "It's just a matter of time, sweetheart. And you fucking know it."

 _I know no such thing,_ Kirsty frowns. Negan smiles, his eyes burning into hers. A part of her wants to kiss him, wants him to take her right then and there. And she knows Negan can sense that so she turns away from him, heading back downstairs.

He follows her down the stairs, a huge grin on his face. "Listen, i'm gonna need you tomorrow. So be ready to leave at about seven."

She walks over to her front door and nods before opening it.

"Damn, you're not even gonna offer me a drink?" He smiles.

 _No, i'll see you tomorrow._

"You most certainly mother fucking will."

* * *

Daryl stares at Negan as he walks towards the gate.

"Are those your come fuck me eyes? Because i really can't tell," Negan chuckles. Rick keeps a tight grip on Daryl's arm. "Why don't you let him go, Rick? Let's see what he does?" Negan smiles. "No? Well you're no fun."

"Just leave," Rick sneers.

Negan chuckles. "Come on, Rick. I mean, look at him. Poor thing's sweet on her but he doesn't have the balls to do anything about it. Why don't you go pay her a visit? Go hold hands and make daisy chains or some shit."

Daryl shrugs Rick's arm away and storms off into Alexandria.

"There's a good boy, run off home," Negan laughs.

* * *

Daryl doesn't go home. He practically barges through Kirsty's front door, his heart pounding against his chest.

 _Daryl, are you alright?_ Kirsty mouths as she stands in the kitchen. Daryl almost races towards her, his hands grabbing her waist as he kisses her. The similarity between her reaction and Negan's is eerily similar as she stands there wide eyed. He pulls away from her, looking deep into her eyes. Kirsty can hear his heart pounding as she looks at him silently. As he opens his mouth to say something, perhaps to apologise, she runs her hand over the back of his neck, kissing him softly.

Daryl groans against her mouth, his fingers running through her hair as he kisses her fiercely. He almost whimpers as she unbuckles his belt, her fingers brushing against his stomach sending shivers down his spine. He pushes her against the counter top, his erection rubbing against her almost painfully. Daryl cups his hands over her ass, lifting her up onto the counter. He tugs at her jeans and panties, pulling them down and tossing them to one side impatiently. Daryl lays her back and awkwardly fumbles with himself.

Kirsty grabs his cock and guides him, she grabs his hips and pulls him closer to her. He lets out a groan that sounds almost pained as he slides inside her. Kirsty pulls at his hair, running her tongue over his bottom lip.

One hand grasping at her waist and the other tangled in her hair, he thrusts into her. Daryl groans loudly and he thrusts impatiently for about ten seconds before he shoots his load, baring his teeth as he comes inside her. He almost collapses against her, his breath heavy.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles in the crook of her neck. He feels Kirsty's body begin to shake lightly beneath him so he lifts his head. She's laughing, but in a sweet way that isn't mocking. Daryl looks down at her and smiles, his cheeks going red. He closes his eyes, brushing his nose against hers as he laughs.

Kirsty places her hands either side of his face till he looks her in the eye. _You wanna go to bed?_ She mouths.

"Yes, ma'am," he smiles before kissing her.


	12. Chapter 12

Daryl looks down at Kirsty as she sleeps, the light creeping in through the window. He strokes her hair gently, admiring her. Kirsty stirs, her eyes flickering open. "Hey," Daryl smiles.

 _Were you watching me sleep?_ Kirsty smiles.

"A little," he says, running his fingers over her cheek.

She sees the light coming through the curtain. _Shit! What time is it?_ Kirsty frowns as she sits up.

"It's still early," Daryl says.

 _Negan's gonna be here at seven,_ she panics as she jumps out of bed.

"So? To hell with him," Daryl frowns as he watches her pull on a pair of jeans.

 _I have to work with him, Daryl. That was the deal,_ she says.

"What?" He asks, unsure of what she said. She grabs her pad from the bedside table and writes it out. Daryl gets up out of bed, pulling on a pair of boxers. He takes her gently by the arm. "You don't regret it do you?" His eyes almost plead with her.

Kirsty answers him with a kiss. _I have to go, i'll seeya later,_ she smiles.

* * *

"Hey," Negan smiles as she heads through the gate. He frowns slightly. "You look unusually perky, you have a dream i fucking died or something?"

 _Maybe,_ she smiles before she gets in the truck.

Negan looks over at her, and not for the first time. In fact, he'd been looking at her every minute or so, trying to figure out what was different about her. _She looks all fucking glowy and happy, and..,_ Negan stops the truck, his eyes widening.

Kirsty turns to him. _What are you doing?_

"Did you get laid last night?" He frowns.

 _What the hell are you talking about? Why would you think that?_ She asks uncomfortably.

"I've fucked enough people to know that look, i see it every fucking day in the mirror. You look all glowy and content," he says.

Kirsty furrows her brows. _You're talking nonsense._

"And you're being overly defensive," Negan says.

Kirsty shuffles in her seat. _So what if i did? It's no business of yours._

Negan's stomach churns. "Was it Daryl?" He asks, his throat suddenly dry.

 _Again, that's none of your business,_ she mouths.

"Oh it better not be fucking Daryl," Negan shakes his head, his eyes going dark. "It is, isn't it!" He yells. "I asked you a damn question!" Negan almost spits. His face drops as Kirsty flinches. He steps out of the truck, slamming the door behind him. "Fuck!" He kicks the back of the truck. "Fuck, fucking, cock sucking, mother fucking fucker!" He growls, sweat pouring off his temples.

Kirsty watches him in the mirror, her heartbeat racing. She opens the passenger door and steps out, running towards the woods.

Negan breathes deeply and turns towards the truck, his face dropping as he sees the open door and the empty passenger seat. "Kirsty?" He almost whispers. "Kirsty!" He shouts, heading towards the woods.

* * *

Kirsty runs, tears streaming down her cheeks. For the first time, she's afraid of him. She hadn't been at the line-up so her only feelings towards him had been mostly hate, but now she was scared.

"Kirsty! I'm sorry!" Negan shouts as he runs after her. "Kirsty!"

In typical movie fashion Kirsty trips over a branch, her hands breaking her fall. Thorns scratch at her palms as she gets up. She jumps as Negan grabs her arm, pushing at his chest as he turns her towards him.

"Kirsty, stop it," he frowns, keeping a tight grip on her as she attempts to push him away. He grabs both her arms and shakes her. "Stop it!" He shouts. Kirsty stops squirming, her breath heavy. Negan sees the fear in her eyes. "Kirsty, stop it," he says calmly. "It's not safe to be running around out here. You could get hurt."

 _You scared me,_ she mouths, her lip trembling.

"I know," he says, his gaze softening. "And i'm sorry, okay. I just.. i really fucking like you."

Kirsty shakes her head, tears falling down her cheeks as she turns away from him. _No you don't, you'd kill me in a heartbeat._

"Hey," Negan places his finger under her chin, turning her face towards his. "I would never hurt you. I'm a fucking asshole, i'll be the first to admit that. But i would never fucking hurt you, so don't you fucking think that for one damn second."

Kirsty looks at him cautiously, but his face seems sincere. She wipes at her cheeks as he releases her arm.

"Don't be afraid of me, i fucking expect it of everyone else, but not you," he shakes his head.

 _What are you gonna do?_ She asks.

He looks at her, unsure how to answer. On the one hand, he wants to drive straight back to Alexandria and cave Daryl's head in. But on the other, he really wants her, and he knows full well if he does that then he'll never stand a chance. "Nothing, i'm gonna do nothing, sweetheart."

Kirsty stares at him in surprise. She suddenly feels sickly as she gazes at him, a wave of guilt hitting her as she realises his outburst was most likely because he does genuinely like her. _I'm sorry,_ she mouths.

Negan shakes his head, trying to hide a look of relief. "Don't be, i shouldn't have gone off at you like that. It's not like you're mine," he says, a look of disappointment crossing his face. Negan takes a hold of her arms. "Your hands are bleeding."

 _They're just scratches, doesn't hurt._

Negan raises an eyebrow. "Even so, we should get this cleaned up, i think i've got something in the truck."

* * *

"We have a problem," Jesus says.

"What's that?" Rick asks.

"Maggie, she's refusing to wait any longer."

"Well she'll just have to," Rick frowns. "We can't do anything till we've got everyone on board."

Jesus shuffles his feet. "She already got the Kingdom on board."

"She did?" Rick smiles. "Well that's great! Why didn't she say anything?"

"Because she's making a move, today."

Rick stares at him, his eyes wide. "What?" He runs a hand through his hair. "Where?"

"I don't know exactly, she's sent men out with the purpose of taking out his posts. There's something else you should know," Jesus adds.

"What else?" Rick almost spits.

"She heard something about one of your people, the mute girl."

"Kirsty?" Rick frowns.

Jesus nods. "Maggie's under the impression that she's switched sides."

"What? Where did she hear that?" Rick asks. Jesus shrugs. "That's bullshit. Kirsty's been working with them because she has to, Negan threatened to kill people if she didn't."

"I'm not saying i believe one way or the other, i'm just telling you how Maggie sees it," Jesus says.

"Christ! I need to find out where Kirsty is before she gets caught in the crossfire."

* * *

Negan watches Kirsty from a distance as she takes out another walker. The sickly feeling in the pit of his stomach won't quit, but he knows he can't afford to do anything rash.

"You listening?" Simon frowns. "Negan?"

Negan turns to him. "Sorry, was in a world of my own," he says before looking over at her longingly once again.

Simon clears his throat. "So we should be done with this today."

"Good. Stuff like this is important. Maintaining shit, can't have the roads falling apart when we're trying to get from a to b," Negan says.

"We'll start on a stretch a couple miles from here tomorrow. Needs doing," Simon adds.

Negan pats him on the shoulder. "That's what i like to hear, Simon. Hey, John!" Negan shouts. "How's it going over there?"

"We're good, won't take-," John falls to the ground, a bullet going straight through his skull.

Negan takes a step back. "What the fuck?" He looks in the direction of the woods, his eyes widening as he sees several figures. "Fuck! Everyone draw your weapons!" He yells as he takes out his gun.

Bullets come flying at the saviors, two more going down before they have the chance to realise what's happening.

Kirsty turns her head, unsure of what's going on. _What the fuck?_ She thinks, uncertain whether this is Rick. Surely he would've told her if he was going to attack? Kirsty draws her gun just in case. She runs towards one of the trucks, crouching behind a tire.

"Looks like Hilltop!" Simon shouts.

"Fucking fuckers!" Negan rages as he shoots. He hits one of them, his bullet ripping through their neck. "Where the fuck is Kirsty!"

Simon shakes his head as he fires at the enemy. "She was over there, she must've ran off!"

"If you see her, get her the fuck outta here!" Negan orders.

Simon nods, ducking as a bullet flies mere inches from his head.

* * *

Rick speeds down the road with Daryl right beside him.

"If Kirsty gets hurt-," Daryl starts.

"She won't," Rick cuts him off.

"But what if someone from Hilltop don't know her?" Daryl says.

"Look, she's smart. Bullets start flying and she'll either fight with Hilltop or run off," Rick assures him.

"But what Jesus said about Maggie? Why the hell would she think Kirsty's switched sides?" Daryl frowns.

Rick shakes his head. "I don't know. I guess she heard about what she did to Joe. Maggie's still grieving, she won't understand why Kirsty would touch that thing. You know how it is, Daryl. Someone hears one thing, then before you know it people add shit to it."

"What the hell was Maggie thinkin?" Daryl asks.

Rick turns to him. "Well you were saying the _exact_ same thing. That we should make a move. I guess she got tired of waiting," Rick sighs. "There," he points towards two cars. Rick stops the truck and gets out. They both turn towards the woods as they hear gunfire. Daryl runs.

* * *

Negan runs behind a truck, a wave of relief hitting him as he comes face to face with Kirsty. "Are you alright?" Kirsty nods, her breath heavy. "I'm guessing from the look on your face that you didn't know about this," he says.

She shakes her head, flinching as bullets connect with the truck.

"It's not just fucking Hilltop, there's people wearing Kingdom armour," he frowns, lifting his head above the truck for a moment. "I don't see anyone from Alexandria, but Rick had to know about this, i'm fucking sure of it."

Kirsty grabs his arm. _I'd know if Rick was planning on making a move. He wasn't,_ she shakes her head.

He nods. "Either way, we need to get you the fuck outta here. I'm guessing you're not likely to take out your gun and start shooting with us. You wait here, i'll clear a path," he says before stepping out.

Kirsty leans against the truck, watching Negan as he steps out all guns blazing. A savior goes down to her right, Kirsty turns her head in time to see someone from Hilltop she barely recognises. They turn, aiming their gun towards her. Kirsty jumps up and runs towards Negan.

"Fucking fuckers!" Negan shouts as he shoots at the people of Hilltop and the Kingdom. He runs to his own truck, jumping in and turning on the engine before stepping out to head back for Kirsty. She runs towards him, tripping over her own feet and falling to the ground. Negan raises his gun and shoots the man behind her before running to Kirsty. "Come on, get up!" He takes her arm. Negan frowns. "Kirsty?" He rolls her over, his eyes widening as he sees blood pooling over her vest. "Kirsty?" He almost whispers, shaking her gently. "Kirsty!" He panics.

Simon kneels beside him. "Let me take a look at her!" He shouts. Negan nods as Simon checks her over. "She's breathing, but she looks like she's losing a lot of blood. We need to get her back to the Sanctuary!"

Daryl runs out of the woods. His eyes go from one person to the next, searching only for one. He sees Negan in the distance amongst the chaos running towards a truck, with Kirsty in his arms. "Kirsty!" Daryl runs out, Rick not far behind him.

Negan gets in the back with Kirsty, applying pressure to her wound. He sees Daryl running towards him. "You're a fucking dead man! You hear me you little fucker!" He yells as Simon drives the truck away.

* * *

Negan jumps off the back of the truck before Simon has a chance to switch off the engine. He runs inside the Sanctuary, Kirsty in his arms. His men glance at him as he runs past, his arms covered in blood. "Carson!" He yells as he runs through the infirmary.

The young Dr. Carson jumps from behind his desk as Negan places the girl down on the bed. "Gunshot?"

Negan nods. "Help her," he pleads.

"I'm gonna need blood, and lots of it. What blood type is she?" Carson asks as he cuts off her vest.

"I.. i don't know," Negan takes off his jacket, tossing it to the floor. "But i'm o negative, so take what you need."


	13. Chapter 13

"It didn't hit any of her major organs, and we've managed to stop the bleeding," Carson says as he tosses his bloodsoaked gloves in the trash. "Kirsty's lost a lot of blood though, she's gonna need more."

Negan holds out his arm, his face pale.

"If we take anymore from you your-,"

"I don't have the energy to fucking argue with you, just fucking do it," Negan frowns, sweat pooling at his temples.

Dr. Carson nods as he grabs a belt from his desk, wrapping it around the top of Negan's arm.

Negan winces as he sticks him with another needle. He looks down at Dr. Carson. "Is she gonna be alright?"

Carson looks up at him cautiously. "It's really too early to tell. Like i said, it missed her major organs," he shakes his head. "But she's lost a hell of a lot of blood. There's a risk of her major organs shutting down. We're doing everything we can."

"Well make sure you fucking do," Negan barely whispers as his head lolls backwards. "Or you're fucking fired," he chuckles.

"Drink that," Carson points towards a glass of orange juice.

Negan stretches out his arm and grabs the glass, juice dripping down his neck and onto his shirt as he struggles to swallow. Negan wipes at his mouth with his arm, placing the glass back down. "Did you know that Hilltop were gonna attack?"

Carson stares at him and shakes his head. "No, but then it's been weeks since i was there."

"They're gonna pay for that. Fuck yeah they're gonna pay," he smiles, struggling to keep his eyes open. "You'll be alright though, doctors are important."

"Didn't work out so well for my brother," Carson says.

Negan stares at him with a smirk. "Did you just back talk me?"

Carson clears his throat. "Sorry."

Negan chuckles. "Don't be. I don't mind a little back talk, as long as the occasion calls for it," Negan smiles. He looks Carson in the eye. "I'll be honest, i did go a little OTT with your brother."

"You threw him into a furnace," Carson frowns.

"Like i said, OTT. I let my emotions get the better of me. I wanted to prove a point, that no matter how fucking indispensable you _think_ you are, you're really fucking not," Negan says. "Like Rick the prick. Asshole's gotten way too big for his boots. If Daryl hadn't shown up i might have believed Rick knew nothing about the attack. But there he was, fucking staring at me like it was _my_ fault. Like _i_ was the one that fucking shot her. If she doesn't fucking make it, it's on them, and i'm not gonna be able to control what happens after that. My.. emotions might get the better of me," he smiles.

* * *

Negan stumbles towards Kirsty, his eyes watering as the beeps of the heart monitor take him back to a time he'd rather forget. He slumps down on the chair beside her bed, his eyes heavy. "Hey, sweetheart," Negan smiles weakly as he takes her hand. "You got so much of my blood in you we're practically fucking related," he jokes. "That sounds fucking gross actually, forget i fucking said that," he shakes his head with a grimace.

"Negan," Simon pops his head round the door.

"What is it, Simon?" He asks without turning.

"We got all our men in place, need you to give the order."

Negan shakes his head. "We're not doing it like that."

"But they-," Simon starts.

Negan slams his fist down on the bedside cabinet. "No!" He turns to Simon, his eyes dark. Even in his weak state, his authority still makes Simon take a step back. "I'm not gonna do anything rash. People, are a resource. We'll do what we need to do to keep them in line, but i'm not cutting of my damn nose to spite my fucking face."

Simon nods, swallowing deeply before leaving.

Negan takes her hand once again, stroking her hair gently. "You need to wake the fuck up, sweetheart. Stop me from doing something stupid. Roll your fucking eyes at me," he jokes.

* * *

"Don't be stupid, Daryl. What the hell are we gonna do? Just stroll right in there and take her?" Rick frowns.

"What am i supposed to do, just sit here an wait? She could be dead right now an i wouldn't even know," he sobs, tears filling his eyes.

"Look. Negan seems to have a soft spot for her, and they have the Hilltop's doctor. I don't think he's gonna just sit back and let her die, do you?"

"That ain't the point, i should be with her," Daryl cries.

"It _is_ the point. Right now, that's the best place for her. Let's say you go there, what do you think that's gonna achieve?"

Daryl shuffles his feet. "I love her, don't tell me you wouldn't do the same."

Rick sighs deeply, hands on hips. "Daryl, i get it, i do. But there's nothing we can do for her right now. When she recovers we can make a move, but until then, all we'll be doing is putting her in danger. Surely you can see that?"

"This wouldn't have happened if Maggie hadn't gone behind our backs," Daryl frowns.

"Come on, Maggie's still grieving. She got the wrong end of the stick, could happen to any one of us," Rick points out.

"That supposed ta make me feel better? Cos it don't," Daryl frowns.

Rick tilts his head. "No, i don't suppose it will. But what happened today shows that we can't go running round half-cocked. We need to do this together, or not at all."

Daryl nods reluctantly. "You gonna speak to Maggie?"

"Yeah, i'm gonna head to Hilltop once i've got everything sorted here," Rick nods.

"I'll come with, if i stay here on my own i'll probably do somethin stupid," Daryl says.

"Alright, just don't give Maggie such a hard time."

* * *

Negan dozes in his chair, his hand still resting against Kirsty's.

Dwight leans against the doorway wondering how easy it would be to end it all now just by slitting Negan's throat whilst he sleeps. But he knows it won't end there. He knows there would just be a power struggle. The saviors need to understand that the only way forward is to work with the other communities rather than against them. Negan's death right now would only mean some other asshole putting themselves in charge and leading where Negan left off, or much worse.

He clears his throat and makes his way over. "Negan," he says, shaking his shoulder lightly.

Negan's eyes flicker open. "Dwight?" He rubs at his eyes. "What is it?"

"There's some urgent stuff you need to attend to," Dwight says.

"Can't Simon handle it?" He frowns.

"Your people are getting restless, they need _you_ , not Simon," Dwight shakes his head.

"Fuck!" Negan frowns as he rubs at his temples. He gets up from his chair, feeling much better for the few hours sleep he'd gotten. "Will you sit with her? I don't want her to be on her own."

Dwight nods. "Sure."

"If she wakes up, come get me," Negan says as he heads out the door.

Dwight stares down at her then takes a seat. He wonders how long it'll be before Daryl attempts to come see her. Dwight knows he'll have to put a stop to that. In spite of him and Daryl not getting along, he knows that Daryl is one of the strongest guys Rick has, so they need him. A small part of Dwight thinks it would be better if she died. He doesn't trust her, not after Joe. But then he knows the only reason Negan is being lenient is because of her. If she dies he dreads to think about what Negan would do.

* * *

 _Kirsty walks through the woods, birds singing in the trees. But when she glances upwards they aren't birds at all, but gargoyles. "What the hell?" Kirsty jumps at the sound of her own voice, the same way she does every time she dreams. The woods become dark around her, almost suffocating. The only visible light is to her left, so she heads towards it. As she edges closer it becomes brighter. A small patch of sun shining through the trees, she can almost feel the warmth coming off it as she walks closer. Kirsty makes out a figure. "Daryl?" She says, confused._

 _He turns in her direction with a smile, holding out his hand to her. She goes to take it._

 _"Kirsty," comes a voice from behind her, making her spin on her heels. Negan holds out his hand. There's light on his side, but it's red._

 _"Kirsty," Daryl says. "You know what you gotta do. You know the right choice."_

 _"Don't listen to him, asshole doesn't know what he's talking about. I can keep you safe, Kirsty," Negan says._

 _"He didn't keep you safe though, did he? He got you shot," Daryl nods at her._

 _Kirsty looks down at her vest. Her eyes widen briefly as she sees it's covered in blood._

 _"Wasn't me that pulled the trigger, was it, Kirsty?" Negan says._

 _"Might as well have done, he caused all this." Daryl says._

 _Kirsty goes to open her mouth but nothing comes out._

 _"Come on, Kirsty," Negan frowns. "Those fuckers don't understand you like i do."_

 _"The hell does he know? He's only known you all of five minutes. We're your family, so come on," Daryl urges her._

 _"Yeah, family that got you fucking shot. My people would never do that to you, i wouldn't let that happen," Negan says._

 _Please, just stop, she mouths, her hands covering her ears. Kirsty runs away from the both of them, heading straight for the darkness. A scream pierces her ears. She looks around to see where it's coming from before she realises it's coming from herself._

* * *

Negan sits beside her, stroking her hand gently. He'd barely left her side for the last three days, and it showed. Dark circles covered his eyes, his hair was unkempt, and he stunk. He'd gone to shower the day before, but he couldn't bare the thought that she might wake up whilst he was gone. Or even worse, that she might die whilst he was showering. So he'd hurried back after quickly splashing water over his face and brushing his teeth.

He hums lightly as he stares off into the distance. Kirsty's hand twitches in his and he jumps a mile. His eyes widen as he turns to look at her. "Kirsty?"

She opens her eyes, her vision blurry as she comes to.

"Kirsty!" He smiles, curling his fingers round hers. She shifts herself on the bed, wincing as her body reminds her that she's been shot. "Hey, take it easy," he says.

Kirsty looks up at him, confused. _Where am i?_ She mouths.

"The Sanctuary. I know this is the last place you wanna be, but i didn't have a choice. You understand that, right?"

She nods. _Where's Daryl?_ She asks.

Negan frowns, clenching his jaw tightly. "Back at Alexandria probably."

She stares at Negan. _Does he know i'm here?_

He nods. "Oh, he fucking knows."

 _So i'm guessing you refused to let him see me?_ She frowns.

Negan shakes his head. "Actually, you're wrong, sweetheart. He hasn't even tried to see you. Though you're right, i wouldn't let that fucker in."

Kirsty raises an eyebrow. _He hasn't been here?_

Negan looks down at her sympathetically. "Sweetheart. He was there."

 _What?_

"At the attack, he was there. Rick too, they both knew about it," Negan says softly.

She shakes her head. _No, they wouldn't do that. They would've told me, i would've known, i would have!_ Her lip trembles as tears fall down her cheeks. She winces once again.

"Hey," Negan leans over her running a hand through her hair. "Carson!" He shouts before turning back to her. "I'm sorry, Kirsty. But that's the truth. But forget all that for now, you need to focus on getting better. Don't get worked up about it, you'll just hurt yourself."

Dr. Carson steps through the door.

"She's awake," Negan says.

"Well that's great news," Carson smiles. "Your heart rate is a little high."

"That's probably my fault," Negan says. "I should've left what happened with her group till later."

Carson nods. "Yes, that probably would've been for the best. Kirsty, i'm going to give you something to help calm you down. Right now you need rest and as little moving about as possible. Is that okay?"

Kirsty nods, tears still falling down her cheeks, her shoulders shaking as she tries to stifle her own silent cries.


	14. Chapter 14

"You're healing nicely," Carson says as he removes Kirsty's dressings. "These stitches are good to come out now, but remember, you still need lots of rest, no heavy lifting."

Kirsty nods as she stares towards the window.

"How did that happen?" He points towards her neck.

 _Someone tried to kill me,_ she mouths without looking at him.

Carson nods as he removes her first stitch. "I'm guessing it was after?"

Kirsty nods.

"You must be a fast healer then. I'm sure you'll be up and about in no time. All your major organs are fine, bullet shot through an artery, but everything's healing like it should," he smiles. "Did you lose all your vocals when that happened?"

She nods.

"They're complex things, vocal chords. I've seen a few people in my time with vocal chord damage. Would you like me to take a look once i'm done here?"

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders.

"Maybe another time," he nods. "You missing your people?"

She shakes her head.

"I'm sure they'd come see you if they could."

Kirsty turns to him. _I'm here because of them._

"Oh, sorry. I can shut up if you want me to?"

Kirsty smiles briefly and shakes her head, looking out the window once again.

"You should be able to go for a walk, it'll do you good," he suggests. "You must be bored being cooped up in here for the last two weeks?"

She shrugs her shoulders once again.

Carson takes out the last stitch and removes his gloves. "All done."

 _Thanks,_ she mouths.

"You're welcome. You know, if you ever want to talk.. in confidence, you know where i am," he says.

Kirsty turns to him. _Do you miss Hilltop?_

"I miss the people, yes. But there's people who need me here, keeps me busy. And some of them are not so bad. I worry about Maggie, what with her being pregnant."

Kirsty nods and turns towards the window again.

* * *

"What's wrong with her?" Negan frowns.

"Actually, she's healing really well. In fact, i wouldn't be surprised if she's back to her old self within a month. Pretty incredible for someone who took a shot to the-,"

"I'm not talking about that," Negan cuts him off. "She's done nothing but stare out that damn window since she woke up."

Carson stares at him. "I'm not a psychologist, Negan."

"Well why don't you just hazard a guess?" Negan frowns. "Humour me."

"The people at Alexandria are her family. She feels she's been betrayed by them. I'm not sure that's entirely true but that's none of my business."

"No, it's not. And you're fucking wrong," Negan frowns.

"Either way, she's not taking it lightly. She's hurting, and i don't mean from the gunshot."

"So what would you suggest?" Negan asks.

"For her to reconcile with them."

"Out of the question," Negan says.

"Well if that's not an option then she's gonna need time, maybe something else to focus on," Carson suggests. "I've got other patients to tend to, so if we're done?"

"Yeah, go ahead," Negan frowns. He stands in the corridor rubbing at his temples, his mind in overdrive.

* * *

Negan steps through the door, a tray in his hand. "Hey," he smiles.

Kirsty barely acknowledges his presence, still staring out of the window.

He places the tray down on the table and pushes it over to her bed in front of her. "I brought you some food. I had them make this special," Negan smiles.

 _I'm not hungry,_ she mouths.

Negan's face drops slightly. "Sweetheart, you have to eat. Dr. Carson says you're healing well, but that could change if you don't eat properly."

 _Maybe i don't want to heal?_

"Hey," he takes her shoulders. "Don't say shit like that! Look at me damnit!" Kirsty turns to him. "What the fuck is this? This isn't the Kirsty i know."

 _You don't know me at all._

Negan takes his hand from her shoulders. "No, i guess not. Well fuck you. You wanna lie here and wallow in self pity then be my fucking guest. You wanna die then go right ahead, see if i care," he says, regretting his words as soon as they come out of his mouth.

 _Glad we're on the same page._

Negan sighs deeply. "Come on, Kirsty. You know i didn't mean that. I just.. i don't like seeing you like this. And i do fucking know you. You're hurting, i get it. But don't let what they did consume you. You're better than that. I.. i need you."

Tears fall down her cheeks. _I'm tired._

He wipes at her cheek with his thumb. "Okay, i'll be back later."

* * *

Negan almost falls through the door, cradling a pile of books in his arms. He looks over at Kirsty with a frown, her food still untouched. "Hey, i brought you some books. Figured you might be one of those girls who likes to read for pleasure," he grimaces as he drops them down on the table in front of her. "You like reading?"

Kirsty shrugs. _Used to._

"Well good. I don't know what shit you're into so i brought a bit of everything. I'm not a fan really, but whenever i got bored enough, i'd read shit like this," he holds up a book in front of her. "Now that, is a fucking classic."

Kirsty continues staring out of the window.

"Fine," Negan shrugs as he sits down beside her bed. Negan clears his throat. _'I waited and watched for seven years. I saw him come and go - Dolan. I watched him stroll into fancy restaurants dressed in a tuxedo, always with a different woman on his arm,'_ Negan chuckles. "Man's got the right idea."

Kirsty grabs his arm. _What are you doing?_

He stares at her bemused. "I'm fucking reading, what's it look like?"

Out loud? She questions, raising an eyebrow.

"This is how i read, okay? I'm sorry if it's not _sophisticated_ enough for you. Now if you don't mind," he points towards his book. "Where the fuck was i? Oh yeah.. _'always with a different woman on his arm, always with his pair of bodyguards bookending him. I watched his hair go from iron-gray to a fashionable silver while my own receded until i was bald.'_

Kirsty looks out of the window, but this time she's smiling.

* * *

 _'Howard's skin went cold and seemed to shrink until it was too small to cover the flesh beneath. A single drop of urine spilled from him and plinked in the bowl before his penis actually seemed to shrink in his hand, retreating like a turtle seeking the safety of its shell.'_ Negan glances over at Kirsty with a frown as her shoulders being to shake. He lifts his ass off the chair. "You alright?" He asks. As he catches sight of her face he realises she's laughing. Negan smiles. "That one tickle you, uh?"

Kirsty wipes at her eyes with a smile. _No, i was thinking of something else._

"Course you fucking were," he grins.

She turns to him, a sheepish look on her face. _You think i could get something to eat?_

Negan smiles, a wave of relief hitting him. "Sure, just wait a sec," he gets up from the chair and pops his head out into the corridor. "Dwight, go get Kirsty something to eat."

Dwight nods before heading down the corridor.

* * *

 _Would you stop staring at me.. it's weird,_ Kirsty frowns before spooning more food into her mouth.

"Sorry," he smiles. But he's not. "You want me to read some more once you're finished eating?"

She shakes her head with a smile. _Fuck no._

"You trying to say you don't like my reading?" He frowns in mock offense.

 _Your reading wasn't so bad, but your impressions were cringeworthy._

"Owch!" He places his hand against his chest. "Say it how it fucking is why don't you."

Kirsty giggles silently, dropping the fork on her empty plate. She looks at Negan a little shamefully. _I'm sorry about what i said earlier. It's just.. hard, you know._ Her eyes begin to well up. _I thought they were my family. I never thought they'd lie to me like that. I've lost so many people along the way, but i thought they had my back._

"I know," Negan takes her hand. "And i'm sorry. I really fucking am. It's no secret that i can't fucking stand Daryl. But even so, i never thought he'd do that."

Kirsty nods, gently squeezing his hand. _Have you seen any of them?_

Negan shakes his head. "Things are tense right now. I'm not sure if the other communities are sitting there with their tails between their legs or if they're just biding their time before they attack us again?"

Kirsty nods sombrely.

Negan dips his head, staring down at the sheets. "Maybe they didn't mean for you to get hurt? It'd be all too fucking easy for me to turn you against them right now. Fuck, it's what i want to do, but.. i like you, and i don't wanna see you hurting like this. So maybe i'm wrong?"

Kirsty smiles at him weakly. _I don't think so. You said Daryl was there, and Rick too. Even if they didn't mean to hurt me. They lied to me, and i don't understand why? For whatever reason, they didn't trust me._

"I'm sorry," Negan says sincerely.

 _It's not your fault._

"Well, in the grand scheme of things, it kinda fucking is. I was the one that insisted you work for me. Maybe that got them worried that you might let something slip?"

 _How?_ She raises an eyebrow. _It's not like i can just blurt shit out. They just.. didn't trust me,_ Kirsty shakes her head and wipes at her eyes. _I'm dwelling again. Fuck it! Why don't you read some more, least it might make me laugh?_ She smiles.

"That's more like it," Negan grins as he opens the book in his lap.

* * *

"Hey, can i come in?" Arat pops her head round the door.

Kirsty nods with a smile.

"Heard you're healing well," Arat says as she sits on the edge of the bed.

 _I've still got a long way to go, but yeah, i'm not doing too bad._

"You got out of bed yet?"

 _Just for the bathroom._

"You should come by my place once you're feeling up to it, have a beer or whatever," she offers.

 _Thanks, i'll hold you to that._

"So how are you really feeling? Gotta be hard with everything that's happened."

 _It is, i'm up and down with it right now._

"Negan really cares about you, you know. He's barely left your side."

 _I know._

"Usually with a guy, and Negan is normally no different, it's all about getting into your pants. But this is different. He respects you, that's rare with him. Christ, the hours i spent teaching him to..," Arat stops mid sentence.

 _What?_ Kirsty frowns.

"Nothing, doesn't matter," she says.

 _Teaching him to what?_ Kirsty presses her.

Arat sighs. "Alright, but don't tell him i told you. Teaching him how to lip read."

Kirsty stares at her wide eyed. _But i thought he already knew how to read lips?_

Arat shakes her head. "Nope, i mean, once he got started, he was a natural."

 _So he learned to read lips for.._

"For you. Said he'd feel like a failure if you took that pen out in front of him."

 _I had no idea._

"Don't tell him i told you, though i'm not quite sure why he wouldn't want you to know? I think it's kinda sweet," Arat shrugs. "Maybe that's it? I mean, he does have a reputation to keep up."

 _I guess._

"You gonna stay here?"

 _I'm not sure leaving's an option, not yet anyway._

"I don't suppose it is. Negan won't force you to stay though, not if you really don't want to. I mean, he wouldn't be happy about it, and he'll damn sure let you know about it."

 _I'm sure he would,_ Kirsty smiles.

"He just wants to keep you-,"

 _Safe, i know. I'm starting to believe that._


	15. Chapter 15

Kirsty sits outside, warm air blowing against her skin. It felt good to be out, having been stuck in a bed for the last three weeks. _It's nice here,_ she smiles.

Negan grins. "You starting to like it here?"

 _Fuck no, i just meant this little flower garden you've got going on._

"Why? What's wrong with the Sanctuary?" He frowns.

 _It's not exactly homely, i mean, it's a factory._

"It may not look nice, but at least it's safe," he points out.

 _Is this Jasmine?_ She asks as she reaches out, feeling the petals between her finger and thumb.

"Fuck knows," Negan shrugs his shoulders.

Kirsty turns to him. _Why do you even have a flower garden?_

"You can use them for alternative medicines, we got herbs and shit over there," he points.

 _Do they work?_

"I'd normally be the first to sneer at this kinda shit, but i've seen this stuff work when we've had nothing else, so yeah, it works," he nods. "I'll tell you what's fucking awesome, apple cider vinegar. That shit is like fucking magic. We make that stuff like it's going out of fucking fashion."

Kirsty shifts a little uncomfortably on the bench.

"Hey, are you hurting? You wanna go back inside?" Negan worries.

She shakes her head. _Not yet._

"But if you're hurting we-," Kirsty places her hand on his arm.

 _I'm fine, let me have another five minutes, it's nice out here._

Negan nods with a smile. "Sure."

* * *

Daryl watches from a distance, his stomach suddenly wanting to empty it's contents as she places her hand on Negan's arm. He almost grimaces as Negan takes his hand and places it on hers. "Get the hell off her, douchebag," he whispers.

Though Rick had gone on at him every half hour and made him swear he wouldn't go to the sanctuary, he'd gotten fed up of waiting. His heart hurt every moment she wasn't with him, and he wanted to be rid of the constant ache in his stomach. So he'd come, not entirely sure how he was going to see her, but then there she was, sitting outside. A wave of relief had hit him so hard that tears had filled his eyes. Seeing her, knowing for sure that she was safe meant everything to him.

He tries to justify Negan's hand on hers, maybe she's grateful because he's kept her safe? Maybe she's just playing the part till he can rescue her? Daryl wonders if she's in good enough shape to go back to Alexandria? He'd brought the truck purposely with that intention, but it was parked a couple of miles away. I'll carry her, i'd carry her a hundred miles if i had to, he thinks.

He watches as one of Negan's men comes out to him. Negan stands up, rubbing at his temples. He turns to Kirsty as she gestures with her hand, maybe for him to go? Daryl hopes he does. Negan turns and heads inside, Daryl's heart pounding against his chest as he knows this is his chance to speak to her.

* * *

Kirsty smiles as she sniffs at what she can now confirm is Jasmine. Negan had been insistent that he take her back inside, but she'd insisted more and he'd caved, saying he'd be back in five.

"Kirsty."

She frowns, turning her head. Her eyes widen as she sees Daryl on the other side of the fence. _Daryl?_ She mouths, getting up slowly from the bench with a wince. Kirsty walks over, leaning forward against the fence, her fingers curling against the chainlink for purchase.

"Kirsty," he smiles.

She stares at him, not quite believing that he's there.

"I kept thinkin you weren't gonna make it, and you're here," he smiles, his eyes welling up. "I gotta get you outta here."

Kirsty shakes her head.

"I know, it's not safe now. You think you can get back out on your own later?"

 _Why didn't you tell me?_

Daryl's face drops. "It weren't my choice, i wanted to tell you but Rick thought it was best you didn't know."

 _Why?_

"I.. i don't know," he stutters.

 _You're lying, i can tell._

"Kirsty.. please, can't we just talk about this once we get back?"

 _No,_ she mouths, her eyes on the brink of tears. _Tell me why? Why didn't you trust me?_

"I do trust you," he assures her.

 _Another lie,_ Kirsty sneers as she turns away from him.

"We heard something," he says.

Kirsty turns to him. _What?_

"We heard about Joe," Daryl answers her.

She stares at him confused. _How?_

"I.. i can't say," he drops his head shamefully.

Kirsty's breath becomes heavy, she rattles the fence till he looks up at her. _You can't say? You don't trust me, do you?_

"I do."

Kirsty shakes her head. _How can you say that? You've lied to me, and you're still lying,_ she mouths slowly in the hope she won't have to repeat herself.

"I'm sorry, Kirsty. Just.. come back with me and i'll tell you everything, i swear," he pleads with her.

 _Why didn't you ask me about Joe?_ Her eyes widen. _Did you hear exactly what happened._ Daryl nods. _That's why you don't trust me isn't it? Because i used Lucille?_

Daryl looks down at his feet. "Rick thought it was for the best," he looks up at her. "He was just being cautious."

 _Yeah, and look what that did. It got me shot._

"I didn't know about that, i swear. Soon as i heard about the attack i drove straight out there to try and stop it."

Kirsty shakes her head. _How am i supposed to believe you?_

Daryl curls his fingers over hers through the fence. "It's me, you know me."

 _I don't think i know you at all,_ Kirsty mouths as tears roll down her cheeks. She takes her fingers from the fence, wincing slightly.

Daryl's lip trembles. "Don't say that. I'm sorry, just come back with me and everything will be how it was."

She shakes her head. _I can't._

Daryl drops to his knees, clinging to the fence. "Please, i'm sorry. Come back with me," he begs.

 _Don't do that._

"I ain't movin, not till you say you're comin back with me."

 _You can't do that! She spits. You can't just lie to me for God knows how long then expect me to be okay! Get up!_ She winces again, holding on to her stomach.

Daryl gets up off his knees. "Are you okay?"

 _No, i'm not. And who's fault is that? Just leave me alone._

Daryl shakes his head. "I can't do that."

Kirsty brings her face close to the fence. _Stay away from me. Go back to Alexandria, and don't come back here, because i don't want to see any of you again._

"You don't mean that," he shakes his head. "I.. i love you."

Kirsty's heart skips a beat. _I..,_ she looks away, taking a deep breath before turning to him again. _I don't love you, just leave me alone,_ she says before slowly heading back inside.

Inside the corridor she leans against the wall, slowly and painfully dropping to her ass, her entire body shaking as tears pour down her cheeks. She wails silently, her head in her hands.

Dr. Carson walks down the corridor, frowning as he catches sight of her. "Kirsty, what's wrong?" He kneels down in front of her.

She looks up at him, her face red. _I can't._

"Can't what? Are you in pain?"

 _Daryl, i just saw Daryl outside, and it hurt so much.. i hurt him,_ she sobs silently.

Carson sighs deeply taking her hand. "Come on, first things first, let's get you back to bed."

Kirsty shakes her head.

"I'm not arguing with you, you're going back to bed and that's an order. Then you can tell me whatever you need to, in confidence."

Kirsty nods.

* * *

"I can't tell you whether that was the right thing or not, i mean, what the hell do i know?" Carson shrugs. "I'm sure they had their reasons for not telling you what was going on, as wrong as those reasons were. It's so easy to do the wrong thing."

 _I know._

"The most important thing right now, in fact, the only thing right now that matters is your recovery. All of that other stuff is exactly that, it's just stuff. You're healing so much quicker than i thought you would, but if you go exerting yourself or working yourself into a state then that could change. Daryl, Rick, Negan, they don't matter, you do. And if they really care about you then they'll tell you exactly that."

 _His face though,_ she frowns. _When i told him-,_

"Doesn't matter," Carson interrupts her. "There's hurt on both sides, and for good reason. If he's smart then he'll know deep down that you didn't entirely mean what you said."

 _You don't know Daryl. He always thinks the worst of himself._

"Maybe you're right? But there's nothing you can do about it right now," he shakes his head. "You need to heal, that's all that matters right now."

Kirsty nods. _Were you a shrink or something?_ She smiles.

Carson laughs. "No, but it gets that way when you've been a doctor as long as i have."

 _I'll bet._

Carson looks at his watch. "I've gotta go check on my other patients."

 _It's okay, i'll be alright._

Carson tilts his head. "You won't, but you will be, eventually."

* * *

"Hey, did you get back here alright? Fucking Simon kept going on and fucking on," Negan frowns as he walks through the door.

Kirsty nods, smiling weakly.

"Hey, your eyes look all red. Have you been crying?"

 _A little._

Negan hovers above her, running a hand through her hair. "What is it?"

Her eyes fill up again. _Just thinking about Alexandria.. Daryl,_ she says honestly. _I was thinking about Daryl._

Negan clenches his jaw, trying really hard not to show his distaste at this admission. "Is there anything i can do?"

She shakes her head as she begins to cry once again. _I'm sorry, i can't fucking stop._

"Don't be sorry," he strokes her hair. "Fucking cry as much as you want to, sweetheart."

Kirsty wraps her arm around his back needily. Her need for comfort overtaking her pride.

Negan leans down further, resting his head in the crook of her neck as she sobs against him. It has to be the most awkward and uncomfortable position he's been in for a while, but he couldn't be happier.

* * *

Daryl sits a few streets away from the sanctuary, his shoulders still shuddering occasionally from crying. He smokes a cigarette, tapping the ash away with a flick of his thumb. He watches the smoke drifting off into the wind, contemplating his next move. Alexandria? Sanctuary? Nowhere? He looks down at his hand before he slowly stumps the cigarette out on his skin, something he hasn't done since Beth died. Daryl doesn't even flinch, flicking away the cigarette once he feels he's done enough damage. It doesn't feel like enough this time though. He's not sure it ever will.

* * *

 _Author's note_

 _I just want to say that it physically hurt me writing this chapter. I'm a huge Negan fan but i still have a soft spot for Daryl so if it helps for the Daryl fans, i feel your pain. Unlike my other fics i have no idea where this one is going, i just write it as it pops in my head. Thanks for reading and all the lovely comments. Xx_


	16. Chapter 16

Kirsty slams the door shut, dropping down on the bed with a slight wince. She takes a book from her bedside table, not really having any interest in reading it.

She frowns as she hears a knock at her door.

"Kirsty, open up," Negan says.

Unable to tell him to fuck off, she throws her book at the door. He doesn't get the message, opening the door slowly as he steps inside. Negan picks the book up off the floor.

"Well i can see you've fucking cheered up," he smiles.

 _Go away!_ She mouths before turning away from him.

"Don't be like that," he says as he makes his way over to her. Negan places the book back on the bedside table before sitting on the edge of the bed. "I can't have you out there."

She turns to him. _So you're just gonna keep me here like some damn prisoner?_ Kirsty spits.

"You're not a prisoner here, Kirsty."

 _Then why can't i go out?_ She frowns.

"Because you're not well enough," he says.

 _I'm fine! It's been six weeks, and i feel fine!_

"Really? Didn't seem so fine the other day," he points out. "Don't think i didn't see you pulling your face when you were carrying all those books."

 _You just don't want me to leave cos you're worried i won't come back!_

Negan sighs deeply. "Kirsty, it's not about that. You're not fucking ready, simple as that. And i am _not_ gonna risk you getting hurt out there."

 _I'm going out of my mind, Negan._

"Well why don't you patrol the fences?" He offers.

 _Oh great! So i can be like the workers. That's an awesome idea!_ She mouths sarcastically.

"I don't know what you fucking want me to say?"

 _Stop trying to tell me what i can and can't do, that'd be a start,_ she mouths, before turning her back to him.

"Kirsty, look at me," he places his hand on her shoulder. "Look at me."

She turns slowly, her brows furrowed.

"You feel suffocated, i fucking get it. But there is no fucking way i'm letting you go out there. You almost died, Kirsty. So you can get mad at me if you want, i can fucking take it. What i can't fucking take is my men coming back without you, you're.. you're too fucking important to me, okay?"

Kirsty looks away from him, playing with the duvet cover nervously. _You just don't want me to leave here full stop._

Negan shakes his head. "No, i don't. But once you're fully recovered, i won't stop you. Give it another week, that's all i'm fucking asking for, just one week. And if you wanna go out with my men, then fine, i won't fucking stop that, that's why i damn well wanted you here in the first place," Negan drops his head. "And if you leave when no one's watching, then so be it. I won't be happy about it, that's for fucking sure, but i won't try and bring you back either. Just give me a week."

Kirsty places her hand over his. _Okay, a week._

Negan smiles. He looks around her room. "I see you made yourself at home."

Kirsty sits up on her bed. _It's better than the infirmary, i'll give it that._

"You need anything?" He asks.

Kirsty shakes her head. _I'm good._

"Join me for dinner later."

Kirsty frowns. _I don't know._

"I'll be on my best behaviour, i swear," he says.

 _Yeah, i know you swear._

"I mean i promise, i won't even try and get in your panties," Negan smiles.

Kirsty giggles silently. _You couldn't behave if your life depended on it._

"Well i'll try my fucking best, how's that?

Kirsty rolls her eyes and nods. _Alright._

"Fuck yeah!" Negan smiles as he gets to his feet. "I'll seeya later then, beautiful."

* * *

"Hmm," Carson frowns as he shines a light down Kirsty's throat. He pulls the mirror out of her mouth and removes his gloves, tossing them into the trashcan. "Well they're definitely damaged."

Kirsty stares at him. _Did anyone ever tell you you're not funny?_

Carson smiles. "Yeah, i get that all the time," he swivels his chair to face her. "Anyway, i got a good look at them. You must have suffered some nerve damage, because the left cord is paralysed."

 _So what does that mean? And please keep it simple,_ she frowns.

"You've suffered nerve damage, which has paralysed your cords, so basically, they don't meet in the middle. Normally, if there was going to be improvement, for example, regaining speech, you'd see improvement within weeks."

Kirsty drops her head in disappointment.

"But.. some people show improvement as later as a year, maybe longer, so don't give up hope."

 _But don't get my hopes up either, that's what you're saying._

Carson sighs deeply. "Basically. I'm sorry," he frowns. "That's probably not what you want to hear."

 _It's okay, i wasn't expecting anything more than what you just said,_ Kirsty smiles.

Carson nods. "You still experiencing any pain? From your gunshot wound i mean?"

 _Only when i exert myself, and it's only mild, just the occasional twinge._

"Good. I know it probably doesn't feel like it, bit you're really lucky. Few people can say they survived both having their throat slit and being shot."

Kirsty nods. _I know._

"You need anything else?"

Kirsty shakes her head, getting up from her seat.

* * *

Kirsty sits outside in the flower garden. She thinks about Daryl, her stomach rolling. _Stop it!_ She scolds herself. _There's not a damn thing you can do about it, so just stop._

She thinks about Negan instead. She'd seen a side to him that she was sure no one else got to see, but was that enough? As the weeks had gone by, she'd become more unsure of everything. Maybe they were right not to trust her? She had slept with Negan after all, and deep down, she didn't really regret it. In fact, most nights, she went to sleep thinking about him. Of course, whenever she thought of Daryl, it hurt. So maybe it was easier to think of Negan instead?

Kirsty frowns, rubbing at her temples. Daryl had known about Joe, how had he known? It's not like Alexandria and the Saviors were on speaking terms, never mind sharing gossip. Her eyes widen. Maybe they have a mole? Kirsty wonders whether that should be something she needs to worry about, then decides it's not. Negan's been good to her, but these aren't her people.

* * *

Kirsty steps through the double doors a little nervously. She'd never been to Negan's headquarters before. She'd walked past many a time, but always with her head down, doing her best not to look inside. A wave of relief washes over her as she finds the parlour leading up to his room empty, then she wonders why it should bother her in the first place. It's not like they're together, and if anyone should feel that way, surely it should be his wives?

She knocks at his door.

Negan opens it with a smile. "Hey, i was starting to think you weren't gonna fucking show."

 _Why? Am i late?_ Kirsty frowns.

"No, you're not, come the fuck in, take a seat," he says, stepping aside.

Kirsty steps inside, looking around his room. She gives his bed a brief glance, a sickly feeling in the pit of her stomach. _Stop it!_ She scolds herself mentally.

"You okay?" Negan frowns.

 _I'm fine,_ she says, heading towards one of the chairs.

"Not those," he says quickly. "They're wet."

Kirsty turns to him with a frown.

"I just had them washed," he smiles.

Kirsty laughs. _You did that on purpose, didn't you?_

He shakes his head. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

 _You knew they wouldn't be dry in time, so i'd have to sit next to you._

"Woah!" He frowns, leaning back slightly. "I don't know what dirty thoughts you're thinking, but this was all innocent. Anyway, you trying to say i fucking stink or some shit?"

Kirsty smiles and sits down on the leather sofa. _No, you smell really nice actually._

Negan smirks, running his tongue over his bottom lip. "Really?" He takes off his jacket, draping it over a chair before he sits down beside her.

 _I thought you'd at least have a table to sit at,_ she frowns.

Negan rolls his eyes. "Jesus! Are you ever fucking happy?"

Kirsty laughs silently.

* * *

"So what did you see Carson for?" Negan asks through a mouthful of food.

Kirsty sips at her water, coughing briefly. _You got people watching me or something?_

Negan chuckles. "No, but John said he saw you heading over there."

 _He had a look at my throat._

"Oh, what did he say?"

 _Nothing positive, either it'll heal or it won't, but it doesn't look likely._

"Well that must fucking suck?" Negan frowns.

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders. _Nothing i didn't already know._ She finishes her food, leaning over to place her plate on the coffee table.

"And there's nothing he can do?"

She shakes her head.

"Would you like a drink?" Negan asks.

Kirsty looks at him, unsure. _Go on then, just one._

Negan smiles as he gets up, making his way to the drinks cabinet. He grabs a bottle and two glasses. "Whiskey?"

She nods.

He sits down beside her, pouring a glass and handing it to her. "So how are you, really?"

Kirsty looks down at her feet, swirling the glass in her hand. _Fine._

"You're obviously not fine, come on, i'm not gonna bite your damn head off," he smiles, taking a drink.

 _I miss my people._

Negan clenches his jaw, clearly disappointed. Luckily for him, she's too busy looking at her feet to notice. "We haven't heard a damn thing from them since the attack, any of them. We were hoping to reconcile with Hilltop at least, what with them producing most of our food. Had to send my men out a lot further, try and find shit to keep this place going. We do have a couple of good hunters, so that's something."

 _Welcome to how the rest of us live. It's hard when you can't just take shit from people,_ she mouths with almost a sneer.

Negan stares at her. "I thought we'd gotten past that?"

 _Why would we?_

"I saved your damn life," he leans forward, trying not to raise his voice. "What the fuck did Rick and Daryl do? Oh yeah, they got you shot, they fucking lied to you."

 _I lied to them too._

Negan tilts his head to the side. "Your lie didn't hurt them though, did it?"

 _It would if they knew._

"Why do you care? They don't give a shit about you."

 _You don't know that._

"Really? Because it sure as shit looks to me like they don't give a damn," he bites on his bottom lip. "I know about Daryl."

Kirsty stares at him, her eyes wide. _What are you tal-,_

"You think Daryl could just sneak up to my damn gates without me noticing?" He frowns. "Fuck no! I'll give him his due, he got here unnoticed, but he got sloppy as he was leaving."

 _What did you do?_ She worries, getting up from her seat.

"Oh sit the fuck down, i didn't do anything, i let him go on his merry way, and you know why?"

Kirsty shakes her head, still standing in front of him.

"Because of you damnit! You know how good it would've felt to bash that fuckers brains in? Fucking asshole thinks he can just waltz right up here after killing all my men like that, he's damn lucky he's still fucking breathing!" Negan frowns. "And did i get pissed at you for not saying anything? Fuck no. Those cock sucking fuckers almost cost you your damn life, and you're still protecting them!" He sneers.

 _What do you want me to do?_ She sobs, tears falling down her cheeks. _You want me to just pretend they don't exist?_

Negan gets up from the sofa. "That might not be a bad fucking idea, because you acting like they didn't mean for you to get hurt isn't working out too well for you."

 _You don't know that they knew._

"Oh, come the fuck on. It's fucking obvious they knew, how the fuck could they not? You know what, why don't you just go? Go right on back to Alexandria and see what Rick has to say?"

Kirsty looks nervously at her feet.

"No, i didn't fucking think so, because i'm guessing you heard all you needed to from Daryl," Negan frowns, gritting his teeth.

Kirsty's shoulders begin to shake, her head dropping as she sobs silently.

Negan's shoulders sag, his face dropping as he runs a hand through his hair. "Fuck," he frowns. "I'm sorry, i didn't mean to..," Negan holds out his arm to her then drops it reluctantly.

 _I don't know what to think,_ _Negan,_ she mouths, her eyes red. _I know they lied to me, but i lied to them. I just.. i don't know._

Negan steps towards her, wrapping an arm around her waist as he pulls her close to him. Kirsty buries her head in his jacket, her arms almost clawing at his back. She lifts her head to meet his gaze.

"I'm sorry," he smiles weakly, wiping at her cheek with his thumb. Kirsty stands on her toes, her nose brushing against his as she kisses him softly. Negan brings his hand up, curling his fingers through her hair.

She pulls away from him slowly, placing her hands against his chest. _I need some time,_ she mouths, looking at him apologetically. _Is that okay?_

Negan takes his hand from Kirsty's hair, stroking her jawline. "Of course," he smiles, thinking nothing of the sort as his cock twitches against his boxers.

Kirsty steps away from him. _I'll seeya tomorrow then?_

"Yeah, seeya," he smiles, watching her head through the door. Negan unclenches his fist, his knuckles white.

 **Author's Note**

This one was a little later than normal because i've been editing all my fics, which i'm quite frankly appalled at how much editing they need. Anyway, i wanted to mention briefly, that i received a really nasty comment on . It was pretty vile, incredibly rude, really vague, and accusatory. I'm unsure whether it was just a random hateful troll, or someone who mistook me for someone else. Either way, it was anon, so i couldn't even reply directly to it to call bullshit. I wasn't going to mention it, but thought it best in case i get any more comments like that. Anyway, thanks for reading as always, and thanks for the lovely comments. X


	17. Chapter 17

Daryl sits on the bench sharpening his knife, blocking out the sounds of those around him.

Maggie watches him from a distance, her heart sinking in her chest. She heads over, sitting down beside him. "You alright?"

Daryl looks up, his hair hanging over his face. He nods, then goes back to his knife.

"I'm sorry," she says, dropping her head.

Daryl looks at her. "What for?"

"Kirsty. I should've spoken to you first instead of listening to hearsay."

Daryl shrugs his shoulders. "Ain't your fault. Don't matter anyway, you were right, she's with him now."

"You think they're together?" She asks.

"Why wouldn't they be, i shoulda known she wouldn't be interested in the likes a me, don't know why i thought otherwise."

"Hey," Maggie frowns, taking his hand. "Don't talk like that."

He takes his hand from hers. "Why not? That's just how it is. She told me she don't love me, an i don't blame her."

Maggie sighs deeply. "You really think she meant that? You know, all i can think about now, is defeating Negan. It's all i can think about, because if i stop.. then all i think of is Glenn."

Daryl looks at her from behind his hair, his eyes beginning to water as he thinks of Glenn. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," she stares at him. "That wasn't your fault. Glenn wouldn't want you to think like that," she sighs. "He wouldn't have wanted me to think that way about Kirsty either. But.. i just saw red. I knew she was working with him, but then i heard things, and the thought that she used the same thing that killed Glenn. I was worried that she wasn't on our side anymore."

"You weren't the only one," Daryl says, picking at his nails with his knife.

"I don't know what's going on with her and Negan, i don't know if you're right? But we should've trusted her."

"Don't really matter now," Daryl frowns.

"But it does matter, Daryl. If i had a chance to save Glenn, i'd do _anything_ to make that possible."

"She don't need savin," Daryl says.

"You don't think so? Because i do. He'll poison her mind against us, if he hasn't already. She's only there because of the same reason i told my men not to spare her, hearsay. That, and she's hurt and angry. Don't let her go, Daryl, not when you have a chance to be happy," Maggie smiles, as she runs a hand through his hair. "You deserve that."

* * *

Negan watches Kirsty get in the truck. He stops Simon as he steps out of the Sanctuary.

"Everything alright?" Simon asks.

"No, it's fucking not. I want you to take an extra man with you."

"Sure thing, but why?" Simon frowns.

"So he can watch her every fucking move. She so much as goes for a piss, i wanna fucking know about it, you hear me?"

Simon stares at him, confused. "So you want someone to watch her taking a piss? Because that's weird even by my standards."

"I don't fucking want her out there at all, but she doesn't know that, and she doesn't need to know."

"You worried she's gonna go running back to Alexandria?" Simon asks.

Negan rubs at his temples. "Maybe, either way, i'm not fucking risking it. Just have someone keep an eye on her."

Simon shifts his feet, hands on hips. "So if she does make a run for it, what do you want me to do about it?"

"Just.. reach me on the radio. I'm not fucking sure yet," Negan frowns.

Simon nods. "Alright, but i'm sure you've got nothing to worry about."

"Well let's fucking hope so."

Negan clenches his jaw as he watches them drive through the gates.

* * *

It felt good to be out, to actually be doing something other than pacing the corridors of the Sanctuary.

Kirsty sees a walker heading her way. She makes her way over, not wanting to waste a bullet. She plunges her knife through it's skull, smiling as it drops to the ground.

She didn't have to think about anything other than surviving out here. No Negan, no Daryl, just survival.

"Kirsty, take five," Simon nods.

She nods, tucking her gun into her belt. Kirsty walks towards Simon, pointing at the woods. _I gotta pee,_ she mouths.

"Alright, just watch your ass out there," he says, before heading off to speak with one of Negan's Saviors.

* * *

Kirsty looks all around before she pulls down her jeans and squats. She always got nervous peeing out in the open, even after all this time.

Kirsty wiggles her ass before pulling her jeans back up, buckling her belt. She hears a branch snapping in the distance. Kirsty draws her gun, frowning slightly. She waits, expecting a walker to stumble towards her, but nothing.

She makes her way back to the others, looking for Simon. She sees him leaning against a truck. Kirsty taps his shoulder.

"Hey, everything alright?" He asks.

 _I think someone's out there,_ she mouths.

"I'm sorry," he says, sincerely. "I'm no good at reading lips."

Kirsty takes out her notepad. _I think someone's out there,_ she writes.

Simon frowns. "You sure?" Kirsty nods. "Probably the dead," he says.

She shakes her head. _If it was then they would've been on me._

"Maybe it was one of our guys going to take a piss?"

Kirsty nods. _Maybe?_ She mouths.

* * *

Kirsty arrives back at the Sanctuary, feeling much better. As cold as the Sanctuary was, it always felt good to have somewhere safe to hang your hat after being out there.

She heads to her room. Kirsty washes, then dresses for bed, finding a pair of shorts and a vest.

Just as she settles down, she hears a knock at her door. Frowning, she gets out of bed, the floor cold against her bare feet.

 _Negan,_ she mouths.

"Hey, beautiful," he smiles. "Can i come in?"

 _I was just about to get my head down._

"Yeah, i can see that," he says, biting on his lip as his eyes look her over greedily.

Kirsty rolls her eyes, stepping aside as he walks in.

"Everything go alright out there?" He asks, sitting on the edge of her bed.

Kirsty nods. _Yeah, it felt good to be out, to be doing something._

Negan smiles. "Good, i'm glad. I'm not gonna lie though, i was going batshit crazy while you were out there."

 _Really?_

"Yeah, i worry about you. I don't want you to get hurt," he says.

Kirsty smiles. _Well i'm fine._

"Yes, you most certainly fucking are," Negan says, running his gaze longingly over her body.

 _Don't look at me like that,_ she frowns.

Negan looks up at her. "Why? Am i making you all hot?"

 _No,_ she mouths, biting on her lip.

"Really?" Negan raises an eyebrow. "Because the way you're pushing your thighs together tells me otherwise," he smiles, licking his lips. Negan holds out his hand. "Come here."

Kirsty shakes her head, her breath heavy.

"Come, here," he says firmly, his voice like velvet.

Kirsty steps towards him, placing her hand in his. He pulls her down, sitting her across his lap. Negan wraps his arm around her waist, his thumb stroking Kirsty's cheek as he places his fingers under her chin. He trails his fingers down her neck, his cock twitching as she inhales deeply.

Kirsty can feel him twitching against her ass, the heat between her thighs becoming almost unbearable.

Negan pulls at her hair, tilting her head back as he drags his lip over her neck, his beard prickling against her skin. Kirsty runs her arm around him, clawing at his shoulder. He sucks at her neck, his hand grazing her thigh as he works his way towards her shorts. As he brushes his fingers between her thighs, he smirks. "Would you look at that," he whispers in her ear. "You're all wet for me."

Kirsty shivers as he runs his fingers over her shorts, rocking her hips against his hand.

Negan groans as her ass rubs against his throbbing cock. "Fuck, baby," he nips her earlobe. "Would you like me to eat that for you?"

She exhales sharply as he circles his fingers, even through the fabric of her shorts it creates a beautiful friction. Kirsty brushes her nose against his, nodding eagerly.

Negan grabs her waist, shuffling her off him before he lays her down on the bed. He pulls his shirt over his head, tossing it to one side. Negan hovers above her, his fingers tucking into the bottom of her vest. She arches her back as he pulls it off her, her hips lifting up off the bed needily. Negan places a hand on her stomach, pushing her back down with a smirk. He trails his fingers down to her shorts, curling his fingers beneath the waistband as he slowly pulls then down her legs, her panties going with them.

"Fuck!" He groans, lowering his head between her thighs.

Kirsty claws at the sheets as he flicks his tongue over her clit, her breath heavy. His fingers grab at her waist as she writhes beneath him, his mouth sucking as he circles his tongue over her sensitive nerves. _Negan,_ she mouths, throwing her head back, her thighs tense.

Negan looks up at her as he's nose deep, smirking as she grabs the back of his head, her hips rolling against his mouth. He brings a hand down, stroking her lips as he continues sucking at her. She inhales sharply as he slides a finger inside her, followed quickly by a second. He doesn't take his eyes off Kirsty as he curls his fingers inside her, her juices coating him.

She pulls at his hair, her mouth open as she feels herself getting close. Kirsty lifts her ass off the bed as his mouth and fingers hit all the right places. _Oh, god! Don't stop!_

The corners of Negan's mouth creep up into a smile as he watches her, his head moving wildly as he ravishes her. He groans as he devours her, savouring the taste of her.

 _Negan!_ She mouths, pulsating against his fingers as her orgasm hits her, her legs trembling.

Negan let's out a low growl as he feels her clenching around him, his lips still pressed firmly against her clit as she rides out her orgasm.

As her body begins to still, he kneels above her, his eyes dark with lust. Negan unbuckles his belt, tossing it to the floor.

Kirsty sits up, reaching out a hand as she tugs at his pants. She unzips him impatiently, his cock springing out in front of her.

"Oh, fuck!" Negan groans, as she swirls her tongue around the head of his dick. She runs her mouth up his shaft, his veins pulsating against her tongue as she makes her way back to the tip. Kirsty takes him in her mouth, sucking as she massages his balls. "Fuck! That feels so fucking good, baby!" Negan groans, his voice raspy. He grabs the back of her head, his own tipping back as she moves her mouth over his cock. "Oh fuck! Suck it, baby! Yeah, just like that you dirty, girl!"

He pulls himself from her mouth, laying her back down before he takes off his pants and boxers. "You want this?" He almost groans, teasing his cock between her thighs.

 _Yes, please!_ She mouths, her brows furrowed as she rolls against him.

Negan smirks, running his tongue over his lip. He slides himself slowly inside her, his eyes closing as he lets out a groan.

Kirsty claws at his shoulders, her nose crinkling as he fills her completely. _Oh god!_ She mouths, her legs shaking slightly, still sensitive from her previous orgasm. Negan slides out of her slowly before sliding all the way back in, torturously slow. Kirsty grabs the back of his head, kissing him fiercely, her tongue rolling over his needily.

Negan snaps his hips against her, groaning as she tightens around him, her pussy soaked. "You like that, baby?" She nods her head, her breath hot against his skin. He pulls out almost all the way, before slamming his hips against her once again, his eyes alight as he gazes down at her. Negan grabs her thigh, placing her leg over his shoulder as he continues his slow but firm pace. He groans with every thrust, not taking his eyes off her, delighting in her every breath. Wrapping his hand around her throat, he slams his hips harder, smirking as she trembles beneath him.

Kirsty tenses her thigh against his shoulder, achingly close to her orgasm as he begins to pound into her. _Oh god!_ She mouths.

"That's it, fucking take it, baby!" Negan growls, as he thrusts into her relentlessly. He pushes himself flush against her, his pube bone rubbing against her clit. "Come for me, baby! Fucking come for me!"

Almost as if she were waiting for his permission, Kirsty throws her head back as a second orgasm washes over her.

Negan places his fingers against her chin, tipping her face back in front of his as he watches her. Her breaths are audible, barely a decibel away from an actual moan. "Oh, baby! Fuck!" He growls, his jaw clenching as his cock spasms, shooting his hot load inside her with a few haphazard thrusts.

* * *

They lie together, Kirsty resting her head in the crook of his arm.

"Fuck, beautiful. That was fucking awesome. I've been wanting to do that ever since the truck," he smiles, stroking her hair.

Kirsty looks up at him, placing her hand against his chest. _It was pretty amazing,_ she smiles.

"Fuck yeah it was!" He grins. Negan kisses her forehead sweetly, tucking her hair behind her ear. "You want me to get the fuck outta here?"

Kirsty brushes her finger over his neck and shakes her head. _No, you can sleep here if you want to?_

Negan smiles, kissing her lips softly. "Hell yeah i want to."

* * *

Kirsty sits beside Arat on the back of a truck. She eats her sandwich, trying to stifle a giggle.

"I'm not even joking," Arat smiles. "You wanna play cards later? Bunch of us are getting together, few drinks. We normally play for cigarettes."

Kirsty nods. _Sure, i'm in._

"Cool, i'll make sure i save you a seat."

* * *

Daryl watches her from the woods, his crossbow over his shoulder. A branch snaps behind him. Daryl takes out his knife and quietly puts the walker down. He continues watching her.


	18. Chapter 18

Daryl watches as Kirsty heads towards the woods in his direction. He follows her, keeping at a safe distance in case she should come across any Saviors. After walking for about a minute, he watches her stand still, looking in all directions. Kirsty unbuckles her belt. Daryl looks away, his cheeks going red, feeling like the biggest pervert ever.

He waits till he hears her buckling her belt again before he steps forward.

Kirsty jumps a little, fully expecting to see a Savior. Her eyes widen. _Daryl_ , she mouths.

Daryl steps towards her, trying to meet her gaze and failing, his hair falling over his face as he drops his head.

Kirsty stomps her foot on the ground, getting his attention. _What are you doing out here? There's Saviors all over the place._

Daryl watches her lips carefully, not wanting her to have to take out her notepad. "I was careful, i had ta see ya."

Kirsty's face drops, her shoulders sagging. _Why?_

"Can't talk here, it ain't safe," he whispers.

 _You don't say_ , Kirsty frowns.

"There's a barn, out in the woods three miles west of the Sanctuary, meet me there tomorrow after sunset," he says.

Kirsty shakes her head. _I can't._

Daryl shrugs. "You'll either be there, or ya won't.. i want ya ta be."

Kirsty tilts her head.

Daryl looks over her shoulder. "I gotta go, i'll wait for ya, an if ya don't show, then i guess it's goodbye," he says, clearing his throat before he walks off.

Kirsty stands there, her jaw clenched as she bites back tears.

* * *

A Savior watches Kirsty from the distance. He could've sworn that he'd heard someone, but he'd been too busy pissing. He frowns, watching her head back towards the others. _Maybe she was talking to herself?_ He thinks, then he slaps himself mentally. _She can't talk you idiot!_

He walks over to where she was, looking around in all directions. Even the average person would be able to spot the footprints Daryl had left behind, but luckily for Kirsty, he'd broken his glasses the day before. He shrugs his shoulders, heading back the way he came.

* * *

Kirsty sits round a table with a group of Saviors, a set of cards in her hand. She wasn't very good at poker, in fact, she wasn't very good at card games in general. She'd lost four games in a row, her cigarette stash slowly dwindling away.

She taps on the table, all eyes on her. _I'm out_ , she mouths, tossing her cards on the table.

"Yeah, same," Gareth frowns.

"Looks like it's just you and me, angel," Simon smiles at Arat. "What you got?"

Kirsty barely hears them, her head so far out of the game she might as well not be there.

"Would you look at that!" Arat smiles. "How does it feel to lose, Simon?"

"Yeah yeah, how about another game?" Simon frowns, gathering the cards together and shuffling them.

Kirsty taps Arat on the shoulder. _I'm pretty tired, gonna go get some shut eye._

Arat nods. "Alright, i'll seeya in the morning."

Kirsty gets up from the table, shoving the last of her cigarettes in her shirt pocket. _Seeya_ , she mouths waving at the others. They wave, mostly mumbling as they start another game.

* * *

Kirsty sits in the flower garden, lighting up a cigarette. She hadn't had one for weeks, but now she needed it.

"Holy shit! What the fuck are you doing?" Negan frowns, as he leans against the doorway.

She jumps a little, turning to him. _What's it look like?_

Negan squints his eyes. "Hold the fuck up," he says, turning towards the doorway. He flicks a switch on the wall, a bright light filling the garden. Kirsty shields her eyes for a moment. Negan makes his way over to her. "Those are bad for you, you know."

 _You're bad for me_ , she mouths, blowing smoke towards the fence.

Negan smiles, licking his lips as he sits down beside her. "Yeah, but you fucking like it."

 _Maybe?_ She smiles, turning away from him as she inhales once more.

Negan takes his hand and pulls the cigarette from her mouth, tossing it over the fence.

Kirsty turns to him with a frown. _What the hell did you do that for?_

"Your lungs will fucking thank me in the long run," he frowns.

Kirsty lets out a deep breath. _I haven't had one in weeks, i was just feeling stressed, that's all._

Negan raises an eyebrow, Daryl front and centre in his mind. "Anything i need to worry about?"

Kirsty shakes her head. _No, just the usual stuff_ , she smiles, curling her hand round the back of his neck. She moves her face close to his before she feels his fingers on her chin, pushing her gently away.

"I _really_ wanna kiss you, sweetheart. But you're gonna need a fucking mint first," he says, squinting his eyes.

Kirsty laughs silently. _At least now i know how to repel you._

Negan chuckles. He places his finger under her chin, holding his breath as he kisses her. "Nothing could fucking repel me from you, sweetheart. But you really do need a fucking mint."

* * *

As she lays beneath Negan, her fingers clawing at his shoulders, Kirsty wishes she had a voice. Asshole or not, Negan knows how to fuck. And as her legs begin to tremble, her breath hot against his skin, she wishes she could let out a moan at the very least. But as she tilts her head back, mouth open as her orgasm rips through her, the only sound coming from her is a barely audible ahh, which is drowned out by Negan's grunts and groans as he thrusts into her, his hips losing their rhythm as he shoots his load.

As she lays in his bed, Negan's arm wrapped around her waist, she looks up at him with curious eyes. _Negan_ , she mouths. Negan takes no notice, staring up at the ceiling with a smile on his face. Kirsty taps his chest, his hairs tickling the tips of her fingers.

Negan looks down at her. "What is it, sweetheart?"

She drops her gaze to his chest briefly before staring up into his hazel eyes. _Does it bother you that i.._ , she trails off, not quite sure how to word it.

Negan frowns. "Does what bother me?"

 _When we're you know.. doing stuff_ -,

"You mean fucking?" He smiles.

Kirsty giggles silently. _Yeah, when we're fucking. Does it not weird you out that i don't make any noises?_ She asks, her cheeks going red.

Negan grins, running his tongue over his bottom lip. He shakes his head. "No, it doesn't. I think i make enough noise for the both of us."

 _Well yeah_ , she smiles, stroking his chest.

Negan looks down at her, curling his finger under her chin as he gently tips her head to meet his gaze. "Does it bother you?"

Kirsty nods. Sometimes.

Negan let's out a deep breath. "Don't get me wrong, beautiful. I'd fucking love to hear you scream out my name. But.. Jesus, i'm gonna sound all fucking corny and shit, it's the little things with you. Your breath against my skin, the way your body moves, shit like that. I get to read your body in a way that i've never read _anyone's_ before, i _notice_ stuff that i've never noticed before. Everything's new with you."

Kirsty smiles, burying her head in the crook of his arm.

"Well look at that, my little badass has gone all shy, where the fuck did that come from?" He chuckles.

Kirsty slaps his arm playfully, lifting her head. _Shut up!_ She smiles, lowering her head to nuzzle his neck.

"Hmm, that's nice," Negan almost groans, biting on his lip.

Kirsty lowers her head down to his chest, biting his nipple.

"Ahh, don't bite it," Negan frowns, trying not to smile and failing. Kirsty looks up at him with a sly smile, sitting astride him. His hands go to her hips, his cock already throbbing. "Hell yeah!"

* * *

Negan's eyes slowly flicker open as the light shines in through a gap in the curtains. He looks down with a smile, Kirsty's head nestled in the crook of his arm, her hand resting against his chest. He wraps his arm around her tighter, staring up at the ceiling as he rubs at his eyes with the back of his hand.

He hears a knock at the door. _Fuck off why don't you? Can't a guy get a fucking lie in once in a while?_ He frowns, not wanting to get up. The knock comes again. Negan rolls his eyes, gently taking his arm from around Kirsty before he steps out of bed. He searches for his boxers with a frown, not finding them anywhere. He lifts the cover off the bed, his face lighting up as he catches sight of them, currently being worn by Kirsty. Negan chuckles, grabbing a pair from the set of drawers and throwing them on.

Kirsty shifts on the bed, stretching out and yawning silently. She hears muffled voices. Lifting her head, she sees Negan isn't there. _Negan?_ She mouths, then hates herself for it. She did that almost every morning. Every morning she'd wake up, and for a moment, she'd forget that she was mute. Kirsty lays her head back against the pillow, trying to push the disappointment away.

"Hey," Negan smiles as he closes the door. "You sleep okay?"

She nods.

"Good," he smiles, making his way over to her. "I gotta go out on a run, i'd ask if you wanna come with me, but Simon says he could use your help."

 _How long are you gonna be gone?_

"Couple days, no more than three. Fuck! I really wanna take you with me," he says, biting on his lip in contemplation.

Kirsty shakes her head. _Like you said, Simon wants my help. Looks like i'm in demand_ , she smiles.

"You most certainly fucking are," he grins. Negan swings his legs off the bed, heading towards his bathroom. "Feel free to use my bathroom while i'm gone, and you can sleep here if you want, i don't mind."

* * *

Kirsty stands under the shower.

Negan had left early, and she'd gone out with Simon's group not long after, doing her usual guard duty. They had finished earlier than expected, so she'd taken up Negan's offer and jumped straight in his shower after getting back.

She wipes at the mirror as she steps out, staring at herself. _I am not going, and that's final!_ She thinks to herself. Kirsty dries herself off, getting dressed in fresh clothes, letting her hair air dry.

Kirsty grabs a book from Negan's shelf, the same book he read to her whilst she was in the infirmary. She sits on the sofa, her eyes looking out of the window every so often as the sun begins to drop lower in the sky. She glances at her watch. It's about two hours till sunset. _Stop it! Just read your damn book, and stop looking at your watch!_

She lies stretched out on the sofa, her face towards the window. Kirsty had read the same paragraph about five times. She tosses the book onto the coffee table, giving up on it. Kirsty takes her crumpled pack of cigarettes from her pocket. She stops as it hangs from her mouth. _You really gonna smoke this is Negan's room?_ She takes it out of her mouth and heads out the door.

* * *

She sits on the bench of the flower garden, lighting her cigarette. Kirsty looks at her watch. She guesses it's probably an hour before sunset. _Cut that shit out!_ She scolds herself mentally. _Negan's been good to you. No good can come from going, so just smoke your cigarette, then get your ass back inside._

Kirsty gets up from the bench, flicking away her cigarette. She stands with her hands in her jeans pocket, staring at the chainlink fence. _I could get over that if i wanted, no one would notice_ , she thinks. _Yeah, you could, but you're not._

Kirsty drops to her feet safely, successfully having scaled the fence.


	19. Chapter 19

Kirsty walks the three miles, not entirely sure she's heading in the right direction. Going on impulse, she hadn't thought to take a compass, so she was relying purely on guesswork.

After an hour of walking, she stops, wiping at her brow. _Shit! I should be there by now!_ She frowns. Kirsty looks around her nervously, the woods seeming much more sinister as the sun begins to fade. She walks a few more steps, debating whether she should head back when something catches her eye. Kirsty smiles, stepping out of the woods and into a large open field, a barn standing tall in the middle. She stands still, staring out at the barn. Part of her wants to turn around, head back to the Sanctuary, but her feet are moving forward before she has a chance to change her mind.

Kirsty walks around the barn, frowning as there's no sign of Daryl. She heads back towards the barn doors, jumping a mile as he stands there, arms crossed over his chest.

"Hey," he nods, hair hanging over his face.

Kirsty shivers, a sickly feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"You cold?" He frowns.

Kirsty shakes her head, though she's pretty sure she will be soon, having forgotten to put on a jacket.

Daryl stares at her, unsure of what to say. "Ya want a smoke?"

Kirsty frowns. _No, i'm trying to quit. Why am i here, Daryl?_

Daryl looks down at his feet. "I wanted ta talk ta ya."

Kirsty clicks her fingers, getting his attention. _About what?_

"Everythin that's happened," he says.

Kirsty breathes deeply. _We already tried that._

Daryl squints his eyes. "It's gettin dark out here, we should go inside."

 _Why?_

"Cos i can't read ya lips out here, come on," Daryl gestures towards the barn.

Kirsty relents, following him inside. They climb up into the hayloft, Kirsty standing near the open window as Daryl grabs an electric lantern, placing it on the floor between them.

Daryl clears his throat, his heart pounding against his chest. "I'm sorry."

Kirsty stares at him, confused. _For what?_

"For listenin ta Rick, not tellin ya the truth. I knew i should've, i wanted to. I was stupid," he shakes his head, looking at the ground. "Rick said he weren't sure, an he's sorry too."

 _I'll bet he is_ , she sneers.

"It's Dwight," he says.

Kirsty looks up at him, her eyes wide. _Dwight?_

"Dwight's switched sides, he's helpin us. He came ta us an said you'd killed Joe with Lucille. Dwight said ya couldn't be trusted, but i told Rick otherwise, i swear. Rick was try'na play it safe."

Kirsty shakes her head. _Why are you telling me this?_

"Cos you're one of us," he says.

 _No, not anymore i'm not. I'm with Negan now_ , she says, slowly, looking him straight in the eye.

Daryl's stomach rolls. He clenches his jaw. "Yain't a Savior, yain't one a them."

 _Negan and i, are together now_ , she says, tears on the brink.

He shakes his head. "No, i ain't havin it, he's poisonin ya, whisperin stuff in your ear."

 _He doesn't have to whisper in my ear though, does he!?_ Kirsty spits. _I got hurt, and that could've been avoided if you'd trusted me!_

Daryl wipes at his cheeks, taking a step towards her. "Does he love ya?"

 _I.. i don't know, he cares for me._

"I love ya," Daryl says, tears falling down his cheeks. "You love him?"

Kirsty opens her mouth, her words failing her. _He's been good to me._

"Ain't what i asked, do ya love him?"

 _I could_ , she mouths.

"You love me?"

She drops her head, turning away from him to look out the window.

"Hey!" Daryl says, firmly, stepping towards her. "Answer me."

Kirsty refuses to look at him, so he places his hand under her chin, turning her face to his.

"Tell me ya don't love me, an i'll walk out this barn an never look back, i swear," he says, his eyes burning into hers.

She shakes her head. _I can't_.

Daryl stares at her. "Can't what? He don't love ya, yain't nothin ta him but his new toy. You're everythin ta me," he says, brushing his fingers through her hair.

Kirsty grabs his wrist, pushing his hand from her hair. _Don't_ , she mouths, shaking her head.

Daryl shakes his wrist from her grasp. He grabs Kirsty's shoulders and kisses her, wincing as her lips collide with his.

Kirsty wraps her arms around his neck, her heart pounding against her chest. He snakes his hands around her waist, pushing her backwards. She exhales sharply as her back hits the wall, her hands shakily unbuckling his belt.

Daryl unzips her jeans, tugging them down her thighs as he runs kisses over her neck. Kirsty kicks off her boots, shuffling her jeans down her legs. He curls his fingers under the waistband of her panties, pulling them off needily. Daryl trails his fingers up the back of her thighs, his hands settling below her ass. He lifts her off the floor, her back pushed firmly against the wall.

Kirsty wraps her legs around his waist, her skin breaking out in gooseflesh as he trails hot kisses over her neck. She goes to lower her hand, but instead claws at his shoulders as he slides himself inside her, his hips snapping against hers.

Daryl stands still, his nose brushing against hers as he tries to catch his breath. He rolls his hips, his fingers digging into her thighs. Daryl clenches his jaw, trying his best to hold back as the last thing he wants is to disappoint her. He groans as she tightens around him, shivers running through his entire body. Daryl opens his eyes, pressing his body firmly against hers as he takes a hand from her thigh and places it round her neck.

Kirsty exhales as he thrusts into her, his fingers curled around her neck. She tilts her head back, mouthing his name silently as he groans with every thrust. His lips brush over hers, kissing her ferociously as he thrusts into her more erratically. Kirsty furrows her brows, her mouth wide as she feels herself getting close.

Daryl gazes at her, his lips curling into a smile as she mouths his name.

 _Daryl!_ She mouths, throwing her head back as she pulsates around him, her orgasm washing over her.

He buries his head in the crook of her neck as he shoots his load with a grunt, his hips losing their rhythm.

Daryl's legs weaken. He pulls her away from the wall and kneels on the floor, laying her down as he hovers over her, his breath heavy. Daryl buries his head in the crook of her neck once again, stroking at her hair. "I love you," he breaths against her neck.

Kirsty pulls gently at the back of his hair, meeting his gaze. _I love you_ , she mouths, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear.

Daryl smiles sweetly, his cheeks going red. "Come back with me," he says.

Kirsty stares at him. _I can't_ , she mouths.

"Why?"

She lets out a deep breath. _Negan_.

Daryl frowns. "Thought ya don't love him?"

 _He's been good to me, Daryl. I can't just up and leave, not yet, and i'm not entirely sure i want to go back to Alexandria_. Daryl stares at her, struggling to read her lips. Kirsty rolls her eyes. She pats his shoulder, rolling him off her, and grabs her notepad from her shirt pocket.

"I'm sorry," Daryl says, as he watches her write. "I'm try'na learn."

 _I know_ , Kirsty mouths, showing him the piece of paper.

"Rick didn't mean it, he cares about ya. Maggie's sorry as well, she told me. Just come back with me, ya don't belong there," he pleads with her. Kirsty shakes her head. "How am i supposed ta be alright with ya being there? It ain't fair."

 _Nothing's fair, but it won't be forever. I need time to think, Daryl. I don't want to do anything rash_ , she writes.

Daryl runs a hand through his hair. "Will ya stay here a while? I don't want ya to go yet."

She nods at him with a smile. _Sure, as long as i'm back before sunrise._

* * *

Kirsty makes her way back to the Sanctuary, the night air breaking her skin out in goosebumps. Daryl had offered her is jacket, which she had obviously declined, as much as she'd wanted to take it.

She heads down an alley, peeking round the corner as the Sanctuary is in sight. Kirsty watches as a Savior does his rounds, making his way along the fence. She waits a minute till he's out of sight, heading towards the flower garden. Kirsty looks in both directions before she scales the fence, coming down on the other side with a thud.

The Sanctuary is silent as she walks down the corridors, heading straight for her room. She should shower really, she knows that, but her eyes are heavy. Kirsty lays down on her bed, sleep taking her within seconds of her head hitting the pillow.

* * *

Kirsty's eyes flicker open, light pouring in through her bedroom window. She frowns, feeling fingers brushing her hair. Kirsty turns, her eyes widening at the sight of Negan sitting on the edge of her bed. _Negan?_

"Hey there, beautiful," he grins. "You miss me?"

 _I thought you'd be gone for at least two days?_ She mouths.

"We got shit done quicker than i thought," Negan smiles. He lies down beside her, resting on his elbow. Negan frowns. "You could look a little more pleased to see me."

 _I am_ , she assures him. _I'm just tired, that's all._

Negan bites on his lip. "Hmm, well i know something that'll wake you up," he almost groans, stroking her cheek as he brushes his lips over hers.

Kirsty pulls away from him, her hands against his chest. _I need to go shower_.

"I like your thinking," Negan licks his lips. "I could go run us a bath, that'd be even fucking better."

Kirsty shakes her head. _I was gonna use the communal showers._

Negan stares at her, confused. "The fuck would you want to do that for?"

 _I.. i don't want your people to think you're playing favourites._

"My people can think whatever the fuck they want to think," he frowns, sitting up on the bed. "Has someone said something to you whilst i was gone? Because if someone's giving you shit, i wanna fucking know about it."

Kirsty shakes her head. _No, i just.. i don't want people to think like that._

"But i'm asking you to join me, have i done something?"

Kirsty's face drops as she sees the hurt in his eyes, her stomach sickly. She brings her hand up to his face, stroking his cheek with her thumb. _No, i just.. i have women's stuff that i need to do._

Negan raises an eyebrow. "Is that code for masturbating? Because you really don't need to hide that shit from me, i can lend a fucking hand," he chuckles.

Kirsty smiles. _No, i need to shave, and i don't want you watching me, it's not sexy._

"Well i'll be the judge of that," he smiles. "Why didn't you just fucking say so? You got me fucking worried there."

 _Because i don't have to tell you everything_ , she smiles.

"Hmm, well you don't have to use the communal shower, you can still use mine."

Kirsty looks at him sceptically.

"I swear i won't fucking peek," he smiles, placing a hand against his chest.

She giggles silently, nodding her head. _Okay_.

* * *

Kirsty stands under the shower, washing the scent of Daryl away. She'd panicked as Negan had laid down beside her earlier, sure that he'd be able to smell him on her. But he'd seemed none the wiser.

As she lathers up her hair, her mind runs over what she should do next. She loves Daryl, that much she's sure of. But she cares about Negan, though it goes against every fibre of her being. _You could just leave? Negan said he wouldn't stop you_ , she thinks. But she's unsure of any such thing. What if her leaving got him angry? What if he attacked Alexandria out of spite?

Kirsty shakes her head, pretty sure she's just being over dramatic. She rinses her hair before switching the shower off and stepping out. Wrapping a towel round herself, she stands behind the bathroom door, listening for Negan. He'd reluctantly left her to shower, but she knows that if she walks out in her towel and he's in there, then he won't be able to keep his hands off her. And she's not entirely sure that she'll stop him.

Her eyes widen as it dawns on her that she's actually cheating, something she'd never done in her life, and cheating on someone who was most likely a borderline sociopath at that.

Once she's sure he's not there, she opens the door, letting out a sigh of relief as she sees his room is empty. Kirsty dresses quickly, tying her damp hair into a bun.

Kirsty knows she won't be able to brush him off forever, and she's not entirely she'd want to either. She'll need to make a decision, and quick.

* * *

Negan watches her sleeping soundly, the moonlight creeping in through the curtains. Kirsty had said she had an headache, which he thought was the most bullshit excuse ever, but of course he'd been polite. He'd even gone to the doc and brought her back some painkillers, hoping they'd soothe her head quick enough so she could soothe the ache in his balls. But he'd come back to find her sleeping in his t-shirt, which to be fair, had put a smile on his face.

At first he'd just watched her, his hand slipping beneath the waistband of his boxers as he stroked himself

But now he stares at Kirsty with suspicious eyes, his head moving closer to her. It was a warm night, and she'd kicked the blanket off, his t-shirt riding up her thighs. Negan stares at what looks like finger marks on her thighs, trying to recall whether he had been forceful enough to leave marks like that. _Maybe you did? It's not like you're even on this fucking planet when you're about to bust a fucking nut?_ He tries to reason with himself.

Negan shuffles closer to her, the urge to masturbate suddenly gone. He wraps an arm around her as he closes his eyes, but it's hours before he manages to sleep.

 **Authors note**

 **So this seems to be going a different way than i thought it would. When i first started writing this, i wrote 3 chapters and then didn't write anything for months. But then i got a comment saying how awesome it was and PLEASE UPDATE! Lol. This fic takes me way out of my comfort zone with what i normally write, and certainly how i normally write Negan. To all the people commenting, your comments really help and they are actually holding a bit of sway with this fic. I'm getting a huge mix of Team Negan and Team Daryl readers, and i wish i could make everyone happy. Anyway, thanks for reading. X**


	20. Chapter 20

Daryl strokes Kirsty's hair as she rests her head against his chest, wishing they could lie that way forever.

Negan had gone out, so she'd slipped out of the Sanctuary the first chance she'd got, hoping she wasn't too late. But there he'd been, waiting patiently for her, a shy smile on his face.

"Kirsty."

She looks up at him, brushing his hair from his face.

"Are..," he glances away, unsure whether he wants to ask what he's about to.

She places her hand against Daryl's cheek, turning him to face her. _What is it?_

"Are you an Negan still," he swallows deeply. "Doin stuff?"

Kirsty leans up on her elbows. She shakes her head, reaching for her notepad. _No, but.. i can only say i've got a headache so many times till he realises something's wrong. He's not stupid, and it's not fair either._

Daryl reads it with a frown. "So come back with me."

 _What if something bad happens?_

"Like what?"

 _What if he attacks Alexandria? Or Hilltop?_

"That ain't on you," Daryl shakes his head. "Ya can't hold the weight of everythin on ya shoulders."

Kirsty scribbles on her notepad. _I know, Daryl. But i feel shitty. Whatever you think of him, he cares for me at the very least. I would've died if it weren't for Negan._

Daryl clenches his jaw as he strokes her cheek. "I know, i just want ya back with us. Can't stand ya bein there, makes me sick."

* * *

They stand outside the barn, Daryl reluctant to let her go. He wraps his arms around her waist, kissing her goodbye, unaware that they're being watched.

* * *

Daryl watches her walk off, his heart heavy. He sits down, leaning against the barn door as he lights a cigarette. Daryl contemplates running away with her, just the two of them, start afresh.

"The hell are you doing?"

Daryl jumps up off the floor, flicking away his cigarette with a frown. "You followin me now?"

"No, i was following Kirsty, and it's a good thing Negan sent _me_ out and not one of his other men. What the hell do you think you're doing, Daryl?" Dwight asks in disbelief.

"Ain't none a your business," Daryl says.

"I don't think you realise how luck you were just now. If it was anyone else they'd be running straight to Negan, and you'd be dead. You know him and Kirsty and together now, right?"

"How longs he had people followin her?" Daryl frowns.

"Since the first time she went out, after she recovered. He stopped for a while, but he asked me yesterday to keep an eye on her, which means he's probably suspicious, turns out he's a right to be," Dwight says.

"Kirsty don't wanna be there no more, she's just waitin for the right time ta leave, an she said he wouldn't stop her."

"And when's that gonna be?" Dwight asks. "He has people following her, Daryl. Why do you think he's doing that? You really think he'd be doing that if he was just gonna let her roll on right back to Alexandria?"

"Ain't his choice," Daryl shrugs.

Dwight steps closer to him. "When Negan wants something, he'll do whatever it takes to get it, believe me. Kirsty is his, and he won't let her go without a fight. He finds out about this and he'll never let her leave, and he won't stop until you're dead."

Daryl steps forward, making his way past Dwight. "Well i gotta tell her."

Dwight grabs his arm. "Tell her what?"

Daryl stares at him. "That he's got people followin her. She'll leave if she knows that."

"Will she? Why hasn't she left, Daryl? If you two are getting it on, then why is she still there?"

Daryl bats his hand away. "Don't talk about her like that. She said he was good ta her, an that she's worried he might attack Alexandria if she leaves."

"And she'd be right, that's exactly what he'd do. The only reason he hasn't made a move is because he's sweet on her."

"What? So she's just supposed ta stay with him so everyone gets along? Hell naw!" Daryl snaps.

"So what are you gonna do, Daryl? You really think there's gonna be a happily ever after for you two?"

"Just cos ya let him take _your_ woman, don't mean i'm gon let him take mine. I ain't takin no advice from the likes a you."

Dwight looks down at his feet, a hurt look on his face. He looks up at Daryl. "But that's just it, she isn't yours."

"So what ya gon do? Ya gon run ta Negan an tell him?"

Dwight sighs deeply, rubbing his temples. "I'm on your side, Daryl. How many times do i have to say it before you believe me? But this is stupid, what you're doing is stupid, and it's gonna get people killed, most likely yourself. If you mess with something that belongs to Negan," Dwight shakes his head sombrely. "You'll pay the price, and you won't get lucky like i did."

Daryl glances at the scars on Dwight's face. "Ya call that lucky?"

"Yeah, i'm still breathing. But you won't be if he finds out. He's gone.. weird, since he met Kirsty. He's barely touched his wives, in fact, i don't think he's touched them at all since she got there."

"Ya try'na say he loves her?"

Dwight shakes his head. "No, he's obsessed, and that's worse, because _she_ could end up getting hurt."

"Ya have ta help me get her outta there."

Dwight stares at him in surprise. "What the hell do you expect _me_ to do?"

"Tell her what ya just told me, then help her get out," Daryl says.

Dwight shakes his head. "That's a bad idea."

"How the hell is it a bad idea?"

"Were you not listening to what i just said? If she goes, who knows what Negan will do? Are you willing to risk that, for her?" Dwight asks.

"Yeah, i'd do anythin for her."

"Even risk your people?" Dwight frowns.

Daryl drops his head. "Ya don't know it'll come ta that."

"And you don't know it won't," Dwight says. His shoulders sag as he takes a deep breath. "Maybe i'll talk to her, i'm not promising anything. But, Daryl, you have to put a stop to this. Next time, you might not be so lucky."

* * *

Negan drives down the road with a smile on his face. He'd been worried they were going to be gone for a few days at least, but they'd hit the jackpot, finding a warehouse with enough shit to tide them over for another few weeks, a month at a push if they rationed.

He was glad to be going back, considering he hadn't wanted to go out at all. As he drives down the road, the sun going down, he decides he's not going out on anymore runs for a while. _What the fuck else are my men for? What's the fucking point of being in charge if you have to do all the heavy lifting?_ He thinks.

Negan knows that's not the reason why though. It had nothing to do with not doing the heavy lifting, and everything to do with Kirsty. Something was wrong with her, she'd changed. Except she hadn't changed back to what she was before, that he could handle, hell, her feisty side turned him on. But no, she was just distant, constantly giving him the brush off. _She's fucking hiding something, and if i didn't know any better, i'd say it's someone else's dick!_ Negan grimaces, putting the thought to the back of his mind.

* * *

Negan opens the double doors to his room, placing Lucille down on the chest of drawers. He turns towards the bathroom, noticing a pile of clothes on the floor. Negan opens his mouth then quickly closes it, realising she can't answer. He takes off his scarf and jacket, draping them over a chair before kicking off his boots for the night.

Negan contemplates stripping down completely and jumping in the shower with her, but he's not sure she'll appreciate it. _Probably have another fucking headache_ , he frowns. His eyes are suddenly drawn to her shirt, or more specifically, her shirt pocket and the notepad that's hanging out of it. He glances at the bathroom door, then once again at the notepad.

Negan walks over, pulling it from her shirt pocket. He opens it, disappointment crossing his face as he finds it empty. As he's about to place it back in her shirt, he stops, grabbing the pencil from the holder. Negan walks over to the drawers, placing the pad down. He rubs the pencil lightly over the paper, a mess of half words and letters revealing themselves. Negan squints his eyes. _Many times.. something's wrong.. stupid, an.. he at.. Alexan.. top.._

Negan frowns as he tries to decipher it, then his face drops as he reads the bottom. _But i feel shitty.. I would've died if it weren't for Negan._

Negan's heart pounds against his chest, his face suddenly hot. Who the hell would she be talking to? He tries to think rationally. Maybe she'd been talking to Arat? Maybe she felt shitty about leaving Alexandria and her people? But his mind takes him to places he'd rather not go. _She's seeing someone, she has to be,_ he thinks.

He looks over at the bathroom door, clenching his jaw. Negan rips the piece of paper from the pad, folding it before he places it in a box in his drawer. Walking back over to the pile of clothes, he puts the pad back in her shirt pocket. He takes off his t-shirt, tossing it to the floor, the rest of his clothes following suit.

The bathroom door creaks as he opens it, steam pouring out. He closes the door behind him, standing still as he watches her hazy figure through the screen door. His dick twitches, imagining the water trickling down her naked body, soap bubbles falling lazily between her breasts.

Before he's even aware of it, he's opening the door to the shower.

Kirsty jumps a little, staring at him in surprise. _Negan?_ She mouths. Kirsty doesn't care much for the look in his eyes. They're dark, but also cold. _He knows_ , she automatically thinks. So she's relieved when he kisses her, his hand grabbing her waist and pulling her into him.

Negan is unsure what the writing on her notepad meant, his mind pulling him backwards and forwards. But he's gotta fucking have her, that much he knows. Right now he has to make her his, remind her who she belongs to. He presses her body against the wall of the shower, his cock twitching at her thigh as he rolls his tongue against hers needily.

Daryl goes through her mind, a wave of guilt washing over her, but there's not a damn thing she can do about it. And as he nips at her throat, his hands trailing over her body, there's not a thing she wants to do about it.

Negan groans as he lifts her, his cock rubbing over her sensitive flesh. "Oh, fuck!" He growls, clenching his jaw as he slides deliciously inside her.

Kirsty claws at his shoulders, gazing into his hazel eyes as he rocks his hips against her. She takes a hand, running her fingers through his loose wet curls, her forehead pressed against his as he slowly thrusts into her. Negan runs his lips over her neck, his beard grazing against her hot skin.

"You feel so good, baby," he groans, his hips snapping as she tightens around him. He picks up the pace, panting with every thrust, hungry for his release.

Kirsty furrows her brows, burying her head in the crook of his neck. She bites on his shoulder as he thrusts into her, hitting all the right places as always. _Negan!_ She mouths, throwing her head back.

Negan gazes at her, slamming his hips hard as she pulsates around his cock. "That's it, baby! Fucking milk my dick like a good girl.. fuck!" He groans, as his cock spasms, shooting his hot load inside her. He pants, his hips losing their rhythm as he brushes his lips over hers.

He drops his hands from her ass, her legs struggling to keep her up. Negan keeps his hands on her waist, looking down at her with a smile.

They shower together, each taking turns under the hot water.

* * *

Kirsty lies in bed beside him, wearing his signature t-shirt. The guilt comes and goes in waves. She tries to tell herself that it's Negan she's cheating on, hoping it'll make her feel better somehow, but it doesn't.

Negan looks down at her as he strokes her hair. "You are mine, aren't you?"

Kirsty looks up at him with a frown. _I'm not an object, Negan. I'm not anybody's._

"You know what i mean, Kirsty," he says. "I like having you here, and my people like you."

 _I know._

"I wouldn't want you to be here if you didn't really want to be," he lies, knowing damn well she's not going anywhere so long as he has anything to do with it.

 _I do want to be here_ , she lies, resting her head in the crook of his arm.


	21. Chapter 21

Kirsty sits in the flower garden, a half eaten sandwich in her lap. She looks up as the door opens, expecting Negan. So she's surprised when she's met with Dwight.

"Hey," he nods, closing the door behind him.

Kirsty looks up at him as he makes his way over, unsure of whether he's in the loop that she knows about him. He sits down beside her, picking at his nails. She takes out her notepad, but he places his hand over it, pushing it away.

"Don't do that, it's not safe. My Gran was half deaf, speak slow enough i'll understand you just fine," Dwight says, as he turns to her.

 _Is everything alright?_

Dwight laughs, running a hand through his hair. "Is everything alright?" He glances at her. "Things couldn't be further from right, and you can stop looking at me like you don't know what i'm talking about. I know about you and Daryl."

 _Oh_ , Kirsty mouths, her shoulders sagging.

"Oh," Dwight nods. "What are you even doing? You know what's gonna happen, right?"

 _This isn't easy for me, Dwight. I'm not trying to hurt anyone._

"No, i'm sure that's not your intention. You know, i knew this was gonna happen. Not you and Daryl, but you and Negan. I could see it, from the moment you killed Joe. It's my fault that Rick didn't trust you, because i didn't think he should."

 _Rick should've trusted me._

"Maybe? But it's done now. I knew Negan would get what he wanted, he always does."

 _I love Daryl_ , Kirsty insists.

Dwight stares at her. "Maybe you do, but if you loved him you'd let him go. You know what Negan will do if he finds out."

Kirsty shakes her head. _I'll leave before he does._

Dwight laughs, rubbing at his temples. "You really think that's gonna happen?"

 _But Negan said he wouldn't stop me._

"Negan says a lot of things, and if you really believed that, then why are you still here?"

Kirsty looks down at her lap, playing nervously with her hands.

"I saw you and Daryl yesterday, and you know why i saw you?"

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders.

"Because Negan had me follow you."

Kirsty turns to him, her eyes wide. _What?_

"He's had you followed ever since you first went out, now does that seem like the actions of someone who'd just let you go?"

 _He's had people following me?_

"Yeah, i don't know why you're so surprised?"

 _Oh, i'm sorry, i forgot it's an everyday thing for someone to have you followed_ , she mouths, sarcastically.

"Well Negan's not an everyday guy, is he?" Dwight holds his head in his hands. "Daryl wants you to meet him at the barn again."

Kirsty taps his shoulder. _When?_

"Today, said he's gonna wait for you. He wants you to leave with him. If you do this, i'd suggest you both run and don't look back. Don't go to Alexandria, because that's the first place Negan will go, and it won't end well," Dwight says, getting up from the bench. "You need to make up your mind, and quick, before it's too late."

* * *

Kirsty sits with her head in her hands. She thinks back to when she first went out with Simon's group after her recovery, the feeling that she was being watched. He'd had her followed, and she had no idea. She can't stay, but the thought of leaving makes her stomach roll. Kirsty tries to put all thoughts of Negan out of her mind. Saving her life, reading to her, his ability to make her smile when it was the last thing she wanted to do.

 _You know what you have to do_ , she thinks, staring at the chainlink fence.

Kirsty scales it, unaware yet again that she's being watched.

* * *

Negan watches her climb the fence, his jaw clenched. He watches her head down the alley before he prepares to climb it himself. He holds Lucille, staring at her lovingly. "I'm sorry, baby," he says, apologetically, before throwing her over the fence. Negan climbs the fence with ease, his boots thudding as he drops down beside her. He kneels, picking her up with a smile. "I hope you're thirsty, baby, because we've got some dirty work to do," he says, with a sickening smile.

Negan heads down the same alley, unsure of which way to go. He heads towards the woods on a whim, his lip curling into a smirk as he hears the snap of a twig in the distance. _Maybe she's not meeting anybody?_ Negan tries to reason. _Maybe she's just sick of the Sanctuary? Maybe she just likes to be alone out here?_ He frowns, not believing anything of the sort.

Negan stands still, his eyes widening as Kirsty stops in the distance. He watches as she looks in all directions. _Fuck! She must've heard me_ , he frowns. He squats down, almost certain that she knows he's there. Negan breathes a sigh of relief as she continues on. He gets back up, following her once again, making sure he keeps at a safe distance.

* * *

Kirsty walks out into the clearing, looking up at the barn. Her heart pounds and her stomach rolls. Daryl isn't there. _He's probably inside_ , she reasons, walking over impatiently.

* * *

Negan watches her walk towards the barn, his knuckles white as he grips Lucille. He watches her lean against the side of the barn. A wave of relief washes over him, that is until the barn doors begin to open. His eyes widen as he watches Daryl step out, Kirsty walking towards him. They hold one another, Daryl burying his head in her neck. Negan clenches his fists, squeezing hard enough that his fingernails draw blood. _You dirty red neck mother fucker!_

* * *

"I didn't think you'd come," Daryl says, stroking her cheek.

 _Dwight told me about Negan, that he's had people watching me. We need to go, now._

Daryl smiles. "Really? Ya mean it?"

Kirsty nods. She grabs her pad. _We can't go to Alexandria, we should go as far as we can, just the two of us. Maybe we can come back once things have settled down?_

Daryl nods, pulling her face to his as he kisses her. "I got my bike, tank's full, come on."

They head towards the woods, Daryl wrapping his arm around her waist. Kirsty smiles, the feel of his arm around her washing all her worries away.

They both stand still as they hear a whistle, Daryl's blood running cold as it takes him back to the night they lost Abraham and Glenn.

Kirsty looks up at him. _Daryl?_ She shakes his arm.

"We need ta move," he says, taking her hand in his.

"Too late, asshole!"

Kirsty turns, shivers running through her entire body. She watches with wide eyes as Negan steps towards them, Lucille resting against his shoulder.

"Well look at you two, don't you make the perfect little couple," Negan smiles, his eyes cold.

 _Negan_ , Kirsty mouths. Daryl stands in front of her, his jaw clenched.

Negan chuckles, tipping his head back. "Really? Well that's cute as shit, but do you really think you can stop me, Daryl?"

"I won't let ya hurt her!" Daryl spits.

Negan scowls. "You really think i'd fucking hurt her? She's mine! And you've had your filthy fucking hands all over her!" Negan takes a step forward. "Did you really think you'd get away with taking her from me? That i'd let that happen?"

 _Negan, please_ , Kirsty mouths, her hand squeezing Daryl's arm.

Negan's face contorts in anger. "Don't fucking touch him!" Kirsty flinches, dropping her hand from his arm. Negan points Lucille in Daryl's direction. "He doesn't fucking deserve you! Where the fuck was he when you got shot? I'll tell you where he was, watching from the fucking sidelines, probably fucking laughing while he was at it with his pal Rick! Everything i've done for you, and this is how you fucking repay me? You have the audacity to come out here, and let this piece of shit have what is mine!"

Daryl lunges at Negan, taking him by surprise, Lucille falling to the ground as his grip on her loosens. Daryl connects with Negan's lip, blood splattering over his knuckles.

Negan stumbles backwards, but stays on his feet, his teeth bared as he runs at Daryl. "Fucking fucker!" He growls, tackling him to the ground.

Kirsty looks on in horror, unsure of what to do. She watches as Negan kneels over Daryl, throwing punches at his face, his lip snarling in fury. As she steps forward to pull him off, Daryl throws a punch, rolling Negan off him.

Daryl kicks at Negan, but Negan grabs his boot, pushing him backwards. Negan scrambles towards him, kneeing Daryl in the nuts as he crawls over him. He wraps his hands around Daryl's throat, smacking his head into the ground.

Kirsty jumps on Negan's back, attempting to pull him off. She screams at him to stop, nothing more than air coming out of her mouth.

Negan takes his hands from around Daryl's throat, pulling Kirsty's arms from his shoulders. He leans back, pushing her off him before he wraps his hands around Daryl's throat once again.

Daryl brings his knee up into Negan's crotch, Negan's grip loosening as he winces, the wind knocked out of him. Daryl punches him square in the face, blood dripping from Negan's nose. But he doesn't get the better of him, Negan running on pure adrenaline as he returns the favour, blood splattering across Daryl's face as Negan busts his lip.

Negan grabs his throat, Daryl's eyes going a nasty shade of red as he loses consciousness.

Kirsty gets up, wiping at her forehead, the back of her hand covered in blood. She looks over at Daryl and Negan, her eyes widening. She looks over at Lucille. Kirsty grabs her, standing within Negan's sight, but he doesn't notice. She stands side on, knocking Negan in the temple with the front of Lucille.

Negan falls sideways, clutching at the side of his head. He goes to kneel over Daryl, but Kirsty runs in front of him, brandishing Lucille. He looks up at her, and if he weren't fucking fuming, his dick would probably get hard at the sight of her holding Lucille. Negan points a finger at her. "Put her down," he says. Kirsty shakes her head. Negan goes to stand up, but Kirsty steps towards him, holding Lucille close to his face.

 _Don't_ , she mouths.

Negan's eyes widen as he bares his teeth. "Put her fucking down!"

 _No, don't you hurt him_ , Kirsty mouths, tears falling down her cheeks.

For the first time, Negan notices Kirsty's forehead. His face falls as he wonders whether he did that when he pushed her off him. _This is no time for being fucking soft!_ He frowns. "Give her to me!"

 _I won't let you hurt him_ , Kirsty shakes her head, keeping a tight grip on Lucille.

Negan stares at her. "So you're gonna kill me? Is that what you're gonna fucking do?"

Kirsty's lip trembles, she shakes her head.

"Well that's what you're gonna have to fucking do, sweetheart. Because i'm not leaving these goddamn woods, until Lucille is coated in that red neck asshole's blood!" He snarls.

Kirsty looks down at Negan, her arms shaking. _I.. if you kill him, i'll disappear. One way or another, you'll never see me again, i swear!_ She spits.

Negan looks up at her. "You think i won't be able to find you?" He smirks.

She looks down at him, clenching her jaw. _There's more than one way to make sure you can't see me again!_

Negan's face drops. He shakes his head. "You don't mean that, you wouldn't."

 _Well we'll just see, won't we!_ She spits, shuffling her feet as she holds Lucille.

"You're not gonna swing her, i know you won't," Negan says, biting on his lip.

Kirsty sniffles, her grip on Lucille tightening. She shakes her head. _Please, Negan._

Negan rises to his knees, rubbing at his temples. "Fuck!"

Kirsty looks at him, her eyes flitting between him and Daryl.

"Come back with me, and i'll let him live," Negan says.

Kirsty stares at him, her eyes wide. She shakes her head. _You're lying._

Negan stares at her coldly. "I won't make this offer again, so make your fucking mind up."

 _I don't trust you, you'll kill him anyway_ , she mouths.

"And risk losing you?" He says, softly, tilting his head.

 _You'd do that? Let him live?_

Negan runs a hand over his beard. "I just fucking said so, didn't i?"

 _How do i know you won't go back on your word?_

"I'm a fucking man of my word!" He snaps. "Since when have i ever fucking lied to you?"

 _Since you had people following me!_ Kirsty spits.

"Yeah, well that was different, and it's a good job i fucking did, isn't it?" Negan sneers. "Look, i'm fucking tired of this bullshit. The longer you take to decide, the more i want to smash his fucking skull in, and it'd be so fucking easy. So what's it gonna be, Kirsty?"

Kirsty turns her head, looking down at Daryl. She turns back to Negan and nods.

Negan smiles. "Good fucking choice, now give her to me," he says, holding his hand out.

Kirsty looks at him, her hands shaking as she holds out Lucille to him.

He takes Lucille, his fingers brushing against her lovingly. Negan stares at Kirsty, clenching his jaw. He looks down at Daryl with a sneer, his breath heavy. Stepping closer to her, he grabs the top of her arm. "Come on."

Kirsty stands still. _What if a walker comes by?_ She frowns, looking down at Daryl.

"Well then that's just tough fucking shit, don't push your fucking luck, Kirsty. Besides," Negan nods towards Daryl. "Looks like he's coming round. So it's best if we're not fucking here when he gets up, otherwise he'll open that stupid fucking mouth of his, and i won't be able to help myself."

Kirsty glances at Daryl, watching as his legs begin to move. She looks up at Negan and nods.

 **Author's note**

 **This fic is giving me so much anxiety it's unreal. So i have an idea. I'm playing with the idea of alternate endings.**


	22. Chapter 22

Daryl leans up on his elbows, the world a blur as his eyes struggle to focus. "Kir-," he holds his neck, wincing as pain rockets through his throat like razor blades. He gets up, looking around frantically, panic setting in as he realises she isn't there. "Kirs-," he grabs at his throat once again, a series of nasty racking coughs taking him over. He leans against a tree, trying to get himself under control.

He spins round, drawing his knife at the sound of a branch snapping.

"Jesus!" Dwight says, his eyes widening. "You look like shit."

"Where-," Daryl coughs, his eyes watering.

"Is she?" Dwight hazards a guess. Daryl stares at him coldly, his eyes demanding an answer. "He's taken her back."

Daryl clenches his jaw and turns, walking in the direction of the Sanctuary.

"Woah!" Dwight frowns, tugging on Daryl's arm. "What do you think you're doing?

"I..," he coughs again. "Gotta.. get her," Daryl rasps.

"You got a death wish or something? You won't get within a mile of the Sanctuary without one of Negan's men taking you out. Listen to me, Daryl-"

But Daryl has no interest in listening. He needs to save her, take her as far away from Negan as he can. Daryl shakes off Dwight's hand, but Dwight grabs him firmly once again.

"Hey! Listen to me!" Daryl stops a moment, staring at Dwight. "I was right there watching, i saw what went down, and you're damn lucky he didn't kill you. She made a deal with him."

Daryl's eyes widen. "A deal?" He croaks, coughing into the back of his hand.

"Negan told her if she went back to the Sanctuary with him, then he'd let you live."

Daryl shakes his head. "Naw, she-," he coughs.

"She what? Wouldn't accept an offer like that to save your life?" Daryl steps forward again, but Dwight places a hand on his chest. "Daryl, going there right now is gonna get you killed. You think that's what she wants?"

Daryl stares at him, shaking his hand away as he blinks back tears.

"The best thing you can do, is go see Rick. Right now, that's your best shot. Negan won't hurt her, i know that much. You need to come up with a plan to take Negan down, once and for all."

Daryl knows he's right, but admitting it, even to himself, is hard.

"I need to get back to the Sanctuary. I'll make sure she's alright, Daryl. But you, _you_ need to get back to Alexandria. If Rick isn't ready to make a move, then i'll help you get her out myself, i swear."

Daryl looks at him distrustfully, he nods reluctantly.

* * *

Negan thunders through the double doors of his parlour, Lucille in one hand, Kirsty's arm in the other. His wives look up briefly, quickly dropping their heads as they see the blood drying over his face. He continues on to his room, not giving his wives so much as a glance.

Negan lets go of her arm, placing Lucille down on the coffee table. He turns to the doors, slamming them shut before he stands in front of Kirsty. She gazes at the floor, her shoulders jittering every few seconds as she attempts to stifle her tears. It only serves to anger him more. To see her crying over that asshole, when she's _his_. Negan grinds his teeth, taking a step towards her.

Kirsty still looks down at her feet, but she can feel his eyes on her, her heart pounding against her chest.

"Look at me," he says, his voice low and gravelly.

Tears roll down her cheeks as she refuses to meet his gaze.

"Look at me!" He demands, his jaw clenched.

Kirsty looks up at him, her eyes red.

Negan towers above her, staring down at her with cold eyes. "Do you have any idea, how hard it was to walk away from those woods, knowing that asshole's still breathing?"

 _I'm sorry_ , she mouths.

"Don't fucking lie to me! The only thing you're sorry about is being back here! Isn't it?" Negan spits. He grabs her shoulders. "Answer me!" He yells, shaking her shoulders.

Kirsty shakes her head. _I don't know_.

He pulls her in close, his nose touching hers. "You were going to run off with him, weren't you?"

She nods, tears falling down her cheeks.

"You love him, don't you?" He sneers. Kirsty nods. Negan shakes her shoulders, his fingers digging into her arms painfully. "After everything i've done for you, and you go running off to that piece of shit! You're mine! You're supposed to be mine!"

Kirsty whimpers silently, his fingers hurting her arms. _Please, Negan. Don't hurt me._

His face falls in disbelief. But then he looks down at his hands, his fingers almost buried in her skin, deep and hard enough to leave bruises he's sure. He releases his grip on her, his eyes going once again to her forehead, a mess of dried blood that had made it's way down the side of her face.

Negan shakes his head. "I would never intentionally hurt you," he assures her. He lifts his hand to her face, stopping midway as she flinches. Negan drops his hand, his shoulders sagging as he lets out a deep breath.

He opens the door. "Frankie," he calls to his wife. "Go get Carson, tell him to bring his kit with him," Negan looks around the room at his wives. "You can all clear the fuck outta here, my headquarters are off limits until i say otherwise," he orders, stepping back inside and closing the doors behind him.

Negan takes off his jacket, draping it over the back of a chair. "Sit down," he gestures with his head as he parks his ass on the sofa. Kirsty goes to sit on the chair in front of him. "Not there," he pats the space beside him.

Kirsty reluctantly makes her way over to the sofa, sitting down beside him as she plays with her hands nervously.

"Don't be like that," Negan shakes his head.

 _Like what?_ She mouths, looking at him sheepishly.

"Sitting there like you're afraid of me," he says.

 _I am afraid of you_ , she mouths.

"Why don't you love me?" Negan asks, softly, his eyes staring at her needily, making her heart ache.

 _Do you love me?_

Negan frowns, wincing as he bites on his swollen lip. He stands up, running a hand through his hair as he paces the room. "People say that all the fucking time, whether they mean it or not."

 _Then why does it matter if i love you?_

Negan stares at Kirsty, dropping down beside her. "Because you're mine, and if it weren't for that asshole, you would love me, i fucking know you would. Have i ever hurt you?"

 _You're hurting me now, by keeping me here._

Negan's eyes widen, his face flushing as he tries to keep his cool. "I'm trying to keep you fucking safe, which is more than that asshole ever did. Why can't you fucking see that?" Negan takes his hand, brushing Kirsty's hair away from her face. "How did that happen?" He asks, looking at the cut on her head. "Did i do that?"

Kirsty nods. _When you pushed me off, i cut it on a rock._

"I'm sorry, i didn't mean to," he shakes his head.

Kirsty shrugs her shoulders. _Doesn't matter._

"But it does, the last thing i fucking want is for you to get hurt. Daryl can't keep you safe, not like i can," Negan frowns.

Kirsty opens her mouth, closing it again as she hears a knock at the door.

"That'll be Carson," Negan says, getting up from the sofa.

"Is everything..," Carson stares at Negan, a leather medical bag in his hand. "Oh," he says, looking at Negan's face. "We'll get you cleaned right up."

"I'm fucking fine," Negan frowns, as he steps aside. "I want you to take a look at her."

Carson steps inside, looking over at Kirsty. He frowns. "How did she do that?" Carson stares at Negan accusingly.

"None of your damn business. Just do your fucking job," Negan frowns.

Carson nods, making his way over to Kirsty. He sits on the coffee table, giving Lucille a wide berth. "Let's have a look shall we?" He says, placing his hands either side of her temples. "Does it hurt?"

Kirsty shakes her head. _Not really._

"Well let's get it cleaned up, see if it needs stitches," Carson says.

Negan stands near the door, watching sheepishly.

* * *

"And we're done," Carson smiles.

"So she doesn't need stitches?" Negan asks.

Carson shakes his head. "No, it looked worse than it was. Just keep the bandage on for forty eight hours, and it should be fine. You want me to take a look at your injuries?" He asks him.

Negan shakes his head. "No, i'm fine. You can go now."

Carson nods, turning to Kirsty. "If you need me for anything, you know where i am."

 _Thanks_ , she nods, offering him a weak smile.

Negan closes the door as Carson leaves, leaning against it as he sighs deeply. "I'm sorry, Kirsty, for that," he gestures towards her forehead.

Kirsty can tell by the hurt on his face that he means it. _Come here_ , she mouths, patting the coffee table.

Negan slowly steps forward, sitting on the edge of the table. He watches as she gets up, digging through her backpack. Kirsty pulls out a first aid kit and a bottle of water, placing the kit in her lap as she sits in front of him.

"What are you doing?" He asks, a bemused look on his face.

 _What's it look like?_ She mouths, grabbing a cloth and tipping water onto it. Kirsty holds the cloth up to his face. Negan relents, his elbows resting on his knees as he leans forward. Kirsty wipes at the blood on his face, taking care around his lip and nose. She can feel his eyes on her, Negan never looking away for a moment.

Most of the blood washed off, she grabs an antiseptic wipe. Negan winces as she dabs gently at his bottom lip. _Sorry_ , Kirsty mouths, looking him in the eyes.

Negan shakes his head. "Don't be," he says, softly. Even with a black eye and a swollen lip, he doesn't fail to make her heart skip a beat, and he knows it, his lip curling up into a smirk. She looks away, focusing on tending to his lip. Negan curls his fingers around her wrist, lowering her hand. Kirsty stares at up at him. "Do you love me?"

Kirsty drops her head, her shoulders rising and falling as she breathes deeply. _How can i?_ She asks, lifting her head. _I mean, look at you. I thought i could love you, but how can i? I thought you were a monster when i met you, but then..,_ she trails off.

Negan places his fingers under her chin, his other hand still wrapped around her wrist. "But then what?"

 _I thought maybe there was more to you, but there isn't,_ Kirsty shakes her head. _You just wanted me to think there was._

"Hey, i never lied to you. Whatever you saw in me, that was fucking real," he insists.

 _I can't love you, Negan, because nothing you do is real. You're a monster._

Negan clenches his jaw, his eyes burning into hers. "You don't fucking know me at all."

 _No, i don't. I bet i've only touched the tip of the iceberg of what you're capable of._

"You know what?" Negan releases her wrist. "Fuck you," he frowns, getting up from the table. "I don't know what i fucking see in you, you're a selfish bitch."

Kirsty looks up at him with a smile. _There's the real Negan, where have you been hiding all this time?_

"Are you purposely trying to piss me off? I just did you a fucking favour!"

Kirsty gets up from the sofa. _You call that a fucking favour?_

"That asshole is still fucking breathing! Sounds like a fucking favour to me!" Negan yells.

 _I had no choice but to come here!_ She spits. _You forced my hand! How could you ever expect me to love someone who'd do that to me?_

Negan squints his eyes, a bemused look on his face. "Fuck you, i'm going to bed," he frowns, turning away from her. Kirsty grabs her backpack, slinging it over her shoulder. "Woah, where the fuck do you think you're going?"

 _To my room._

"This is your fucking room from now on, you think i'm letting you outta my sight so you can leave first chance you get?"

 _I'm not sleeping in there with you_ , she frowns in disbelief.

"I know you're fucking not, not after talking to me like shit. You're in the fucking doghouse, you can have the sofa," he says, throwing her a pillow.

 _I'm not sleeping in here._

"Well that's up to you, stay the fuck awake for all i care, but you're not leaving this fucking room without me."

* * *

Kirsty had fought sleep for as long as she could, but eventually it had taken her.

Negan creeps over to the sofa, draping a blanket over her. He stands there a while, watching her sleep. Kneeling down, he strokes Kirsty's hair, listening contentedly to her breaths.

His lip trembles as her words echo through his head. _You're a monster.._ Negan shakes the thought away, but it won't go. _Maybe you should let her go?_ But as he looks down at her sleeping, he knows he can't.


	23. Chapter 23

Daryl steps through the gates of Alexandria, Michonne's eyes widening at the sight of his black eye and busted lip, even more so at the bruises covering his neck.

"Daryl, what happened?" She frowns, making her way over to him.

"Where's Rick?" Daryl asks, his hair covering his face as he drops his head.

Michonne brushes Daryl's hair from his face. "He's at our house. What the hell happened to you?"

"Don't matter, i gotta see Rick," Daryl says.

Michonne places a hand against his chest. "Hey, it does matter. Was this Negan?" Daryl nods. "Did you try to see Kirsty? Is that what this is?"

"Why? Ya gon yell at me? Tell me i should stay away?"

Michonne stares at him, her face softening. "No, why would you think that?"

"Everyone else seems ta think so," Daryl says.

Michonne smiles, placing her hand against his cheek. "You love her. If it were Rick out there, no one could stop me. What i _am_ gonna tell you, is you need to be smart about this."

"I'm tired of waitin," he frowns.

Michonne nods. "I know, i'm tired of waiting too."

* * *

Kirsty's eyes flicker open. She rubs at them with the back of her hand, stretching out on the sofa with a silent yawn. As she looks over at Negan's empty bed, she frowns, confused as to why he'd leave her alone, especially after last night's speech. But then she leans up on her elbows, light snores filling her ears. Kirsty looks down at the floor, Negan laid in just his boxers, spit drying on his chin as he sleeps soundly in the space between the sofa and the coffee table.

Her emotions lay somewhere between, her heart aching, knowing that he most likely fell asleep watching her, and being creeped out.. knowing that he most likely fell asleep watching her.

She lays her head back against the sofa arm, looking down at him in confusion. His actions are those of someone in love, but yet she's sure he doesn't love her, how could he? Kirsty watches him, hypnotised by the rise and fall of his bare shoulders with every breath he takes. She wonders about Lucille. Lucille obviously meant something to him because he still refused to let her go, he must have loved her. _But that was before_ , she thinks.

"Don't go." Kirsty jumps a little as Negan mumbles incoherently, his body shifting against the floor. She looks down, his eye moving rapidly beneath it's lid as his nose brushes against the rug. He winces, his eyes scrunched as if in pain. "Don't leave me," he whispers, his voice low and gravelly.

Kirsty gazes at him, her heart wanting to hold him, but her head telling her to run, run right now whilst he sleeps. So he dreams about his dead wife, who gives a shit?

"Kirsty.. don't leave," he groans, his breath heavy.

Her heart skips a beat, so sure that he was dreaming of Lucille, that it takes her by surprise. _It doesn't mean anything, you're nothing more than a possession to him._ Even with that thought in her mind, she leans down, placing her hand against his shoulder. His skin is warm to the touch, and she has to remind herself that he's the bad guy, that he's the reason she's still here.

She shakes him awake, his body twitching as his lashes flutter, his eyes staring at the bottom of the sofa in confusion. He looks up, seeing her gazing down at him. "Kirsty?" He utters, not quite believing she's still there as his dream slowly fades.

 _I'm here, you okay?_

Negan rubs at his eyes before leaning up on his elbows. "Yeah."

She taps his shoulder. _What are you doing on the floor?_

"I..," he didn't want to admit that he'd been watching her sleep. "Fuck knows? Maybe i was sleep walking or some shit?" He rubs at his lower back. "Fuck! I'm gonna regret sleeping on the floor later, that's for fucking sure."

Kirsty gets up from the sofa. _I'm gonna go get washed up_ , she mouths, heading for the bathroom.

He nods, watching her walk away.

* * *

"Daryl," Rick smiles, his smile quickly turning to a frown. He walks down the steps towards him, placing a hand against Daryl's shoulder. "What the hell happened?"

Daryl shuffles his feet. "Negan, we fought."

Rick's eyes widen. "You fought? Did you kill him?"

"Wish i had, didn't get the chance. He has Kirsty."

"I'm confused," Rick frowns.

"She was gonna leave with me, i met her outside the Sanctuary. But he saw us, an he has her. We have ta save her, Rick."

"I thought she was with him?" Rick asks, confused.

"She said she loves me. He was gonna kill me, Dwight said she told Negan she'd go back with him if he let me live."

Rick nods, patting his shoulder. "Alright, then we do this, today."

Daryl stares at Rick. "Ya mean it?"

"Yeah, it's long overdue. I'll get everyone in place. We need to drive out, see Dwight."

"Why?"

"Because we need him, there's people at the Sanctuary, innocent people, people who might want Negan gone, we need them," Rick says.

Daryl nods. "Alright, let's get goin then."

* * *

Dwight walks down the corridors of the Sanctuary, heading towards Negan's headquarters. He knew full well that Daryl would want to know Kirsty was okay, but he hadn't seen her since the woods. In fact, he hadn't seen Negan either. Dwight goes to open the doors to Negan's parlour.

"I wouldn't do that."

Dwight turns to see Sherry leaning against the wall behind him, a cigarette hanging from her fingers. "Why not?"

"Negan said no one's to go in there without his say so," she says, flicking ash onto the floor.

"You seen him?"

Sherry shakes her head. "Not since he stormed in there yesterday."

"He look alright?" Dwight asks, not sure if he can trust her anymore.

Sherry furrows her brows. "Why do you care?"

"It's a simple question, Sherry."

She bites on her lip, dropping the cigarette to the floor and crushing it beneath her shoe. Sherry shakes her head. "No, he didn't look alright. He was covered in blood, and he didn't look best pleased about it. Do you know what happened?"

Dwight shrugs his shoulders. "No idea."

"That mute girl was with him, Kirsty. I figured she must've done something to piss him off, because he looked like he was fuming. She must be something really special, Negan's barely looked at us since she got here."

Dwight stares at her coldly. "You almost sound like you care."

"Would you care if i did?" She asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Go suck a dick, Sherry," Dwight says.

She stares at him, a hurt look on her face before she heads back down the corridor.

Dwight waits till she's gone before he places his ear against the parlour doors, hoping to hear Kirsty. _Well that's dumb_ , he thinks to himself. Dwight turns the knob slowly, the door opening with a creak. He makes his way towards Negan's room, pressing his ear against the door. Footsteps, a shower running maybe? Dwight needs to know she's okay, knowing Daryl will give him shit otherwise.

"I wasn't looking," Dwight hears from within. "I wasn't, i fucking swear. Anyway, it's not like i haven't seen it all before."

 _She's fine_ , Dwight assures himself.

* * *

Kirsty grips her towel tightly as Negan looks her over greedily. _Yeah, well that doesn't mean you get to see it again_ , she frowns.

"Don't be like that, baby. I mean, fucking look at you," he smiles, biting on his lip.

 _Stop it_.

Negan raises an eyebrow. "If you really didn't want me to look at you, then why did you come out here in just a towel?"

 _Because i have no clean clothes._

"Oh," Negan says, his confident expression falling. "Well there should be something in my closet," he says, gesturing with his hand.

Kirsty rummages through the closet, grabbing a pair of faded blue jeans, and a black tank top. She wonders for a moment who they belong to, and then decides she doesn't care as she throws them on. Kirsty leaves her damp hair down, letting it air dry as she steps out of Negan's closet.

Negan steps out of the bathroom, buckling his belt with a smile. "You hungry, sweetheart?"

Kirsty shakes her head.

"Come on, you must be hungry? You haven't fucking eaten since yesterday," he frowns.

 _I'm not hungry_ , she insists.

"You gotta eat," he says, softly. "I'm gonna go bring you something," he says, throwing on his jacket.

 _Can't i get it myself?_ Kirsty frowns.

"No, you fucking can't. You're not leaving this room until i fucking say so."

 _You can't keep me here forever, Negan. What are you trying to do? Suffocate me until i love you?_

"Now there's an idea," he smiles, running his tongue over his bottom lip. "You into that?" Kirsty grabs her boot off the floor, throwing it at him. Negan ducks, the boot missing him by barely an inch. "I'll take that as a no then," he smiles. He stands tall, making his way over to her. "Don't do that again," he frowns, then heads for the doors. "I won't be long," he says, closing and bolting the doors behind him.

* * *

Dwight drives down the road, his knuckles white as he grips the steering wheel. He pulls up outside a dilapidated gas station, Daryl and Rick leaning against the back of their truck. Dwight steps out.

"Where is she? Is she okay?" Daryl asks, before Dwight has a chance to close the car door.

"She's fine, just relax, Daryl," Dwight says.

"Relax? Don't be tellin me ta relax when Negan has her!" Daryl spits.

"He's not gonna hurt her, how many times do i have to tell you that?" Dwight assures him.

"So what's the plan?" Daryl asks, looking from Dwight to Rick.

Rick rests his hand on his hip. "It's gonna happen tomorrow, we-,"

"What the hell? You said it was gone go down today," Daryl fumes.

Rick holds out his hand. "Just calm down, Daryl. We can't get everything in place that quick. Hilltop are gonna take over the Sanctuary, whilst we get Negan to Alexandria somehow, then we can take him down. It's one more day, Daryl. We have to do it properly, can't go doing this half assed. Okay?"

Daryl nods reluctantly.

* * *

Kirsty pushes her food around the plate, not in the mood for eating.

"Come on, sweetheart. You've gotta eat," Negan says.

 _I am_ , she frowns, shoving a mere morsel into her mouth. _There, you happy?_

Negan sighs. "Do i look like i'm fucking happy? Christ, Kirsty," Negan frowns, getting up from the sofa. He rubs at his temples, turning his back to her. "Is this how it's gonna be?" He asks, facing her.

 _How do you want me to be, Negan? Do you want me to pretend?_

"No, i don't want you to fucking pretend, i want you to damn well see what's right in front of you."

 _Oh i can see perfectly fine,_ she says, with a sneer.

"Don't be like this," Negan squats in front of her, placing his hand against hers. "I can keep you safe, haven't i always kept you safe?"

Kirsty stares at him, not sure how to reply knowing the answer is yes. _That's not the point, i'm only here to save Daryl, and you know that._

Negan clenches his jaw, his eyes burning into hers. He lifts his hand from hers and rises to his feet, looking down at her coldly. "I got shit to do, you want anything?"

Kirsty shakes her head, watching him leave. She places her plate on the coffee table, leaning back against the sofa as tears fill her eyes.

* * *

Dwight arrives back at the Sanctuary, slamming the door as he steps out of the car.

"Who pissed you off?" Arat frowns.

"Oh, it's nothing. Thought i was onto something, supplies and all that, turned out to be nothing."

"Well let's hope we find something soon, stuff's running low," she nods, before walking off.

Dwight walks through the halls of the Sanctuary. He stops down the corridor, hearing Negan talking to another Savior. Dwight knows this will be his opportunity to go see Kirsty, tell her what's happening. He races towards Negan's parlour, his hand holding the door knob, then he hesitates. _What if she fucks things up?_ _Does she really need to know?_ Dwight wonders. Rick and Daryl want her to know, but they also underestimate her feelings towards Negan. Would she really stand by and let them take him out, knowing that he'll die? _She's better off not knowing, everyone will be better off if she doesn't know._ Dwight turns around and heads to his room.

* * *

Negan opens the doors to his room, his face dropping as he glances at Kirsty's barely eaten plate of food. He goes to open his mouth, but decides against it, too tired to argue anymore.

She sits on the sofa, looking out of the window, refusing to acknowledge he's there. Kirsty watches the sun go down, her arms crossed against the sofa arm as she rests her head on them.

Negan sits on the chair opposite, his hands clasped together as he rests them on his knees, watching her silently. He's not sure how much longer he can keep her like this, not if she refuses to eat. _Fuck if i'm gonna let her go to him_ , he thinks.

Kirsty turns to Negan. Her eyes widen briefly as she catches him staring at her, but he doesn't seem to care, not taking his eyes off her. _I'm tired, gonna get my head down,_ she mouths.

He nods, getting up from the sofa and grabbing a pillow from his bed. Negan makes his way to the sofa, looking down at her. "You can have the bed," he nods, dropping the pillow down.

* * *

Daryl stares up at the ceiling, waiting for the sun to rise. He hadn't slept well, the thought of taking Negan down and having Kirsty back, keeping him from sleep. Daryl had spent the night playing it out over and over in his mind. He wanted to be the one to kill him, it had to be him. _It will be._

* * *

Negan stares up at the ceiling, his arm tucked behind his head. He'd spent most of the night tossing and turning, thinking of nothing but Kirsty.

As the sun begins to rise, a knock at the door startles him. He gets up, throwing on his clothes as they continue to knock impatiently. "Hold the fuck on," he says, pulling his t-shirt over his head.

"What the fuck is it?" Negan frowns, staring at Simon.

Simon holds out a radio. "It's Rick."

Negan stares at the radio, raising an eyebrow. "The fuck does that prick want?"

Simon shrugs his shoulders. "He didn't say."

Negan takes the radio, closing the bedroom doors as he steps out into the parlour. "Rick, what the fuck are you doing waking my ass at this hour?"

"We need to talk," Rick says.

"Well go ahead and talk, prick. I'm listening," Negan says.

"Face to face, we need to come to some sort of agreement," Rick says.

"Well i couldn't agree more. What kind of agreement?" Negan asks.

"One that benefits the both of us. All this fighting, it's getting us nowhere, how much longer can we go on piling up the bodies of our men?"

"Well that's on you, prick. I tried to show you the way, and what did you do? Oh yeah, you attacked my people, and, you shot one of your own.. not that she's one of yours anymore," Negan smiles.

"We need to stop, otherwise we'll just keep tallying up the dead, is that what you want?" Rick asks.

"No, but again, that's all on you, Rick. What do you want?" Negan asks.

"Come to Alexandria, we can talk things over," Rick says.

Negan chuckles, his finger pressed on the radio. "You really expect me to fall for that, prick? Come on, you think i'm that stupid?"

"No, i don't. You'll either come or you won't."

"You know if i stroll up to Alexandria, i'm not coming alone, so you try anything, you'll lose," Negan smiles.

"Bring as many men as you want, like i said, we need to talk."

* * *

Kirsty rolls on her side, glancing at the empty sofa. As she leans up on her elbows, the doors open, Negan grabbing his knife from the bedside table.

 _What's going on?_

Negan turns to her. "What was that?"

 _What's going on?_

"I gotta go out, i'll be back later."

 _You're gonna leave me locked in here all day?_

"Yeah, i'll leave someone outside, so if you need anything they'll get it for you."

She hops out of bed, grabbing Negan's arm. _You can't keep me here forever._

He looks down at her, brushing Kirsty's hair from her face. "I know, and i'm sorry, it won't be forever, i promise," he smiles.

Kirsty stares at him, watching as he grabs Lucille from the coffee table.

"I'll seeya later," Negan smiles, before he heads through the doors.

* * *

Kirsty dresses in the clothes she'd taken from the closet, her stomach rumbling. She knocks on the doors, Gareth opening them with a smile.

"Hey, you okay?"

Kirsty takes out her pad. _I'm hungry, could you get me something?_

"Sure," he nods. Kirsty taps his shoulder, writing on her pad.

 _Do you know where Negan's going?_

"No, i don't."

 _Has he gone yet?_

Gareth scratches his head. "I'm not sure, i'm guessing not though, cos he had stuff he needed to do before hand. You want me to get a message to him before he leaves?"

Kirsty shakes her head, stepping back through the double doors.

"I'll be back in five," Gareth says through the doors before he bolts them.

* * *

Dwight bumps into Gareth in the hall as he heads in the direction of Negan's headquarters.

"Hey, aren't you supposed to be watching Kirsty?" Dwight asks.

"I'm just getting her something to eat, she said she was hungry. Aren't you going with Negan?"

"Yeah, i just have to grab something first," Dwight nods. As Gareth turns to walk away, Dwight hits him in the back of the head with his gun, Gareth dropping to the floor.

* * *

Dwight stands in front of the double doors, debating how much he should tell her, or whether he should tell her anything at all. _If you tell her now, it's not like she can do anything about it, and she needs to know about the takeover._

A tap at the door startles him, Kirsty no doubt hearing his footsteps.

"Kirsty, it's Dwight. I.. some shit's going down today. Negan's going to Alexandria to talk with Rick, but Rick's gonna ambush him."

Kirsty listens from the other side of the door, her eyes wide.

"Soldiers from Hilltop and the Kingdom are gonna come here. Some of the other Saviors know, and they're fine with it. They just want it over. They don't wanna hurt anyone, they just need to take this place until Negan's gone.. for good."

Kirsty's heart pounds against her chest. _No.._ She bangs on the door. _Dwight! No! Let me outta here!_ She screams, uselessly.

"You'll be alright," he says, before he walks away.

Kirsty pounds on the door, but it's useless, he's gone. Her throat hurts from her futile attempts at screaming. She coughs, grabbing a bottle of water. Kirsty gulps it down, every swallow like sandpaper.

 _What do i do?_ She panics, her eyes searching the room. She doesn't want Negan dead, that much she's sure of. Kirsty looks over at the window, opening it as she sticks her head out, glancing left and right. Her eyes settle on a drainpipe not far from the window. She goes back inside, grabbing her rucksack and throwing it over her shoulders.

Kirsty climbs up onto the window, creeping out carefully. She reaches out for the drainpipe, stretching her leg. It's closer than she thought, and before she knows it she's on the ground, her boots pounding against the dirt as she runs for the flower garden. She had contemplated going to one of the Saviors, but she wasn't sure which ones could be trusted. Kirsty scales the fence, knowing full well where she can find a truck.

* * *

 **Author's note**

 **So this is it, the next update will be the final chapters. There are going to be two endings. One titled 'Daryl', and the other titled 'Negan'. The Daryl chapter is the ending this story deserves, and the Negan chapter is the ending i want. They'll both be posted at the same time, and hopefully within the next week if i write fast enough. Thanks for reading, and all the lovely comments, you're an awesome bunch. X**


	24. The Final Chapter Daryl

**If you only want to read the Negan ending, then skip to the next chapter.**

Daryl sits on his porch, a cigarette hanging from his mouth, and a knife in his hands. He sharpens it, squinting as smoke trails it's way up into his eyes.

"Daryl," Rick nods, sitting down beside him. Daryl takes a drag of his cigarette before he flicks it away, going back to sharpening his knife. "They should be here in a couple hours."

"Everyone know what they're doin?" Daryl asks.

"Yeah, let's just hope it goes smoothly, i don't wanna lose anyone else."

"Ya think she'll be there?"

Rick looks over at her house, or what was once her house. "I don't know, it's better if she isn't."

"Why?" Daryl frowns.

Rick sighs deeply. "She's been there a long time, Daryl, and she was with him, at least for a little while. I'm pretty sure she's not gonna want to see him die."

Daryl shakes his head. "She loves me."

"I'm not saying she doesn't, but just because she loves you, that doesn't mean that she feels nothing for him. I mean, he did save her life," he reasons.

Daryl stands up, staring at Rick with wide eyes. "You defendin him now? After everythin he's done?"

Rick rises to his feet, running a hand through his hair. "No, i'm not. I know exactly who he is, Daryl, you know that. I'm just saying, this isn't gonna be easy for her. It's best if she isn't here when it goes down, i hope she isn't."

Daryl looks down at his feet, kicking idly at the ground. "She'll be okay though, she'll understand, right?"

Rick looks at him, unsure of any such thing. "I guess she'll have to. This was always gonna happen," he pinches the bridge of his nose, looking away from Daryl. "Christ, none of this would've happened if it weren't for me. I should've kept him away from her, told him to go to hell when he showed up here wanting Kirsty to work with him."

Daryl shrugs his shoulders. "Like ya said at the time, weren't nothin ya could do. It's done now, an we gon make it right, that's all that matters."

* * *

Kirsty runs through the town, panic setting in as she worries that the truck might be gone. Maybe someone had taken it? _Shut up!_ She frowns, struggling to catch her breath as she races down an alley. Her face lights up, Kirsty breathing a sigh of relief as she sees the truck in the distance.

She opens the door, jumping in the truck and switching on the engine. Kirsty inhales sharply, feeling pressure on her calf, snarls filling her ears. _Shit!_ She mouths, pulling her leg upwards and out of the walker's grasp. Kirsty brings her foot down on it's head, the feel of it's skull breaking sending shockwaves through her leg.

She steps out of the truck, cursing herself for not being more careful. Kirsty drags the walker from under the truck with ease, the dead thing having no bottom half. She sits back in the driver's seat, trying to catch her breath. Kirsty looks down at her leg. She leans over, rolling her jeans up. Kirsty falls back in the seat, a smile crossing her face briefly. _Shit that was close!_ She thinks.

Kirsty closes the door, stepping on the gas.

* * *

"Do we know how many of his men have turned traitor?" Daryl asks.

"Dwight says there's enough so they won't put up a fight," Rick says.

"And we're supposed ta trust him?"

"Well we don't have much of a choice, Daryl."

"So what we gon do with em after?"

Rick stares at him, raising an eyebrow. "Do with them?"

"We're gonna have ta deal with em, can't let em go," Daryl says.

"That's _exactly_ what we're gonna do. That's part of the deal, Dwight's gonna lead the Sanctuary once this is all over."

Daryl's fingers tighten round the strap of his bow, his jaw clenched. "I thought we was gon take em all out?"

Rick shakes his head. "Daryl, they're surrendering. Not just that, but they're helping us. You really wanna take out innocent people?"

"They ain't innocent."

"Neither are we. We have to find a way past this. There has to be a way forward, surely you can see that?"

Daryl shrugs. "I just see Saviors. Ain't a one of em deserves ta live."

"Even Dwight? He's helped us, he didn't have to. And what about the people at the Sanctuary? They have prisoners there, women and children, do they deserve to live?" Rick frowns.

"Ya know what i meant."

"Either we all find a way to live together, or we die together," Rick says.

* * *

Negan drives down the road, Dwight sitting beside him. He stares out at the road with a frown. Something doesn't feel right, and he can't quite put his finger on it.

"This feel right to you?" Negan asks.

Dwight turns to him. "I don't know. He said he wants to talk, so we should talk. We're running low on supplies, we need the Hilltop at the very least."

Negan nods. "Yeah, i know that. I just can't shake the feeling that something's off. You feel that?"

Dwight shrugs his shoulders. "We've got more men, armed to the teeth. What can go wrong?"

"A lot of shit could go wrong," Negan turns his head, something catching his eye in the woods. "Shit, was that a herd?" He frowns.

Dwight turns his head. "I didn't see nothing."

"Maybe we should pull over? Make sure," Negan says, his foot stepping slowly off the gas.

"Maybe it was just a couple?" Dwight says. "John's out there, if he sees anything he'll holler on the radio."

Negan looks down at the radio in his lap, contemplating getting through to John himself. "Fuck it, you're probably right, nothing he can't handle," he nods, stepping on the gas.

* * *

Kirsty speeds down the road, Negan's convoy nowhere in sight. _Come on, come on,_ she mouths, rocking backwards and forwards in her seat, willing the truck to go faster.

The warning light flashes on the dash, telling her the tank is low. _Fuck!_ She snarls, a series of coughs taking her over as her throat tickles, no doubt from her silent screaming session earlier.

She grabs a bottle of water from the passenger seat, unscrewing the lid. As she brings the bottle to her lips, her eyes widen as she looks out at the road.

A herd, making their way from one side of the road to the other, much like cattle. _Shit!_ Kirsty turns the wheel, instinctively stepping on the brakes. The truck flips sideways, barrel rolling through the herd of dead, blood and guts coating the truck as it lands on it's roof, about 100ft from the herd.

* * *

Gareth groans against the mattress, his eyes slowly flickering open. He rubs at the back of his head, a wave of relief washing over him when his hand comes back clean and not covered in blood.

"The hell?" He frowns, pushing himself up off the bed. He looks over at a table in the corner, miniature figurines made out of wood laid out upon it. Gareth gets up, turning the door knob in his hand. It's locked. "Shit! Hey!" He shouts, banging on the door. "Lemme out!" He takes a step back as the knob begins to turn.

The door opens, a woman he doesn't recognise pointing a gun at him. "Don't move!" Gareth holds up his hands, shakily. "Step out, slowly," she orders, taking a step back.

Gareth steps out into the hall, his throat dry. "What's going on?"

"I'm from Hilltop, don't do anything stupid, and you won't get hurt, understand?"

Gareth nods. "Yeah."

"Good. Come on, i'll take you to the others."

* * *

Kirsty hangs from her seat, her fingers brushing the roof of the truck. Her eyes flicker open as she struggles to take a breath, her seatbelt cutting into her. She looks around herself in confusion, the world upside down. That's when she hears the sound of the dead, her eyes widening in realisation as she remembers why she spun the truck in the first place.

 _Shit!_ She frowns, her hands going to her belt. It won't budge. _Fuck! Come on!_ Kirsty panics, trying to get the belt to unclip. She falls down with a thud, lucky she doesn't snap her neck. Kirsty grabs her rucksack and scrambles out of the open window, running towards the woods as the dead close in.

 _Oh Christ!_ She thinks, as she runs through the woods, her breath heavy. Her vest would be transparent with sweat if it wasn't for the walker crap all over it, her jeans much the same, splattered with the remains of the dead.

Kirsty leans against a tree, trying to catch her breath. She checks herself over, looking for any open wounds that the walker blood could potentially seep into. Kirsty breathes a sigh of relief when she finds none. Her stomach hurts though, and her chest. As she lifts up her vest, she can see an angry red mark from the impact of the seatbelt, no doubt in her mind that it'll bruise nicely. _Thank God i was wearing it though,_ she reasons, knowing she certainly wouldn't have walked away otherwise.

Assured that she's going to be okay, she goes back to worrying about Negan. She loves Daryl, but she can't let Negan die, she won't. Her head snaps to the left as she hears a walker. Kirsty places a hand over her knife, then she stops, the walker stumbling straight past her without so much as a look. She looks down at the crap covering her, a brief smile crossing her face as she realises she's unintentionally camouflaged herself to the dead.

Kirsty pushes herself off the tree, willing herself to go on, unsure how she'll get there in time with no transport.

* * *

Negan pulls up to the gates of Alexandria, looking up at Rick on the platform above the gate. He grabs Lucille from the back seat, opening his door with a smile as he steps out.

"Rick, it's been so long. I've missed you, please tell me you fucking missed me?" Rick stands with his hands on his hips, looking down with his jaw clenched. "I'll take that as a fucking no then," Negan smiles, running his tongue over his bottom lip. "You got me all the way out here, the least you can fucking do is get your ass down here and talk."

Rick steps down from the platform, opening the gate and stepping out, Eugene closing it behind him.

Negan stares at him, his eyebrow raised. He holds his arms out by his sides. "Well? What the fuck have you gotta say, Rick? You want me to pull my ass out so you can kiss it?" Negan chuckles.

Rick looks at him with a smile. "It's over, _you're,_ over."

Negan frowns. "The fuck you talking about?" The sound of a shit ton of guns cocking all at once fills his ears. "Shit!" He looks around him, men in the woods and on the walls, all aiming in his direction.

"Drop your weapons," Rick orders.

Negan lifts his hand to his men. "Hold the fuck up, none of you drop anything," he says, but then he hears guns cocking behind him. Negan turns round, four of the ten men he'd brought aiming their guns at him, including Dwight. "Oh you two faced mother fucker. I should have thrown you in the fucking furnace."

"It's over," Rick repeats himself. "We have your people."

Negan stares at Rick. "The fuck you do."

Rick takes the radio from his belt. "This is Rick, get me Simon."

The radio crackles in Rick's hand. "This is Simon. Negan.. i'm sorry, they took the Sanctuary."

Rick clips the radio back onto his belt. "Like i said, it's over," he says. Rick turns to Negan's men who are none the wiser to Rick's plan. "You can all live, if you just hand over your weapons. Only Negan has to die."

Negan stares at him, baring his teeth as he clenches his fists. "You arrogant, prick!" Negan takes a step forward, stopping as Rick pulls out his gun.

"Go on," Rick smiles. "Take another step."

* * *

Kirsty wipes at her brow, sweat pouring off her. She's close, no more than a few minutes away. Her feet pick up the pace, arms swinging as she races through the woods.

She spots the wall and frowns, cursing herself as she realises she's on the wrong side. _Shit!_ Kirsty mouths.

* * *

"So you're gonna kill me, is that it?" Negan smirks.

Rick nods. "Yeah, that's pretty much it," he says, smugly.

"Then i've got nothing to lose," Negan frowns, his eyes going dark. Negan throws Lucille at Rick, taking him by surprise.

She connects with Rick's leg, tearing at the material of his jeans and piercing his skin. Rick drops his gun as Negan lunges at him. Negan's men, or rather the six of them that are still with him, grapple with the four traitors, shots going off all around them.

"Hey!" Daryl yells, running out of the woods. "Watch ya don't hit our own!"

Negan crouches over Rick, grabbing the collar of his shirt. "You fucking, prick!" Negan falls sideways, pain shooting through his head like lightning.

Daryl rolls him off Rick, Negan laying on his back unconscious. "Rick!" Daryl holds out his hand, pulling him up. "You alright?" Rick nods. Daryl looks over at Lucille on the ground. He walks over, picking her up off the floor, making his way over to Negan.

The gunfire stops as the people of Alexandria get Negan's men under control.

Daryl stares down at Negan, his jaw clenched.

* * *

Kirsty runs round the side of Alexandria, her heart pounding against her chest. She'd heard gunshots, and that could only mean one thing, she was most likely too late.

She runs out, Negan's trucks parked outside the gate. Kirsty looks at the people of Alexandria, their guns aimed at Negan's men, but she couldn't care less about them. She breathes a sigh of relief as she sees Daryl, but then she frowns as she notices him holding Lucille. _What the hell?_ She mouths. Then she sees Negan laid down in front of him, Daryl lifting Lucille above his head, clearly ready to bring her down on Negan's face.

Rick turns at the sound of feet behind him. "Kirsty?" He frowns, as she runs towards him. Rick grabs her, Kirsty kicking out as he grips her tight against him, tears streaming down her face.

Kirsty can barely see Daryl, her eyes an angry shade of red. She tries to break free from Rick's hold, but he refuses to let go. _No, Daryl! Please!_ "No!" She croaks.

Rick jumps a mile, staring down at her in surprise, his hands still gripping her shoulders.

Daryl, just within earshot, turns, his arms still in the air, confused as to who would object to Negan's demise. "Kirsty?" He frowns, lowering his arms.

Kirsty stands there, still squirming slightly, but shock taking her over. She looks straight through him, trying to decide whether that sound actually came from her own mouth.

Daryl walks over to her, Lucille hanging from his left hand. "Kirsty," Daryl brings a hand up to her cheek. Kirsty steps forward as Rick lets her go. "Did.., did ya just say somethin?" Kirsty nods, tears falling down her cheeks. Daryl looks her over, her clothes stained with blood and god knows what else. "You hurt?"

Kirsty shakes her head. "D..," she looks down at the ground, a mixture of fear and shock running through her. She'd dreamt of this too many times to count, but now it's seems hollow, pale in comparison with current events. Kirsty looks at Daryl. "Don't," she says, her voice so deep and husky, it could be a man's. "Pl..," she coughs into the back of her hand. "Please.. don't."

Daryl looks down at her, his thumb brushing her cheek. Her eyes plead with him, and his heart skips a beat. He fights between his heart, and the sickly feeling in his stomach. _You have to do it,_ he tells himself. _Negan has to die._

Kirsty places her hand against his chest. "I, love, you," she croaks, her mouth over exaggerating every word.

Daryl brushes his hand through her hair. He rests his forehead against hers. "I love you too, so much."

* * *

Negan's eyes flicker open, his head throbbing. "Fuck," he groans, rubbing at the side of his head with a wince. He furrows his brows as he stares at a crack in the ceiling. "The fuck?"

"I see you're awake."

Negan turns his head. Rick stands behind a door. _No, not just a door, those are fucking bars,_ Negan frowns. He swings his legs off the mattress, rising to his feet and making his way towards Rick. "Why am i not dead?"

"You've got Kirsty to thank for that, she showed up right before Daryl was about to kill you."

"Woah!" Negan holds up a hand. "You were gonna have Daryl kill me? I'm fucking hurt, Rick. If anyone was gonna kill me, then i'd want it to be you, i hope you know that."

"Cut the shit," Rick frowns.

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's better than okay actually. She spoke," Rick says.

Negan stares at him wide eyed. "She did?" He smiles.

"Yeah, and you know the best thing about that? The best thing, is that you'll never get to hear her. You're gonna rot in here, while Kirsty and Daryl live out their lives," Rick smiles.

Negan clenches his jaw, his hands gripping the bars. "Maybe? Or maybe you not killing me will be the biggest mistake you've made? Let's hope for your sake it's not, prick."

* * *

Daryl walks through the door, taking his crossbow from his shoulder and hanging it from a coat hook. "Kirsty, ya wanna see what i got," he shouts from the hall. Daryl makes his way to the kitchen, watching her wash the dishes. "Hey, i told ya i'd do that."

"Yeah, i want them done some time this year," she smiles, her voice husky and perhaps an octave lower than what it used to be before, but she'd gotten used to it.

He smiles, making his way over to her and kissing her sweetly, his hand going straight to her swollen belly, seven months gone with his child. "I got somethin for ya."

"Is it for me, or the baby? Because if we put anything else in their room, i'm not sure we'll have room for them when they arrive," she jokes.

Daryl smiles, heading back to the hall. He comes back into the kitchen, holding a crossbow in his hands.

Kirsty raises an eyebrow. "A crossbow? How did you know?" She says, sarcastically.

"I was thinkin i could teach him when he gets older.. or her. An maybe once your up ta it, i could show ya how ta use it?"

"Aww, that'll be like date night," she giggles.

Daryl looks down at his feet, his fingers picking at the counter top. "Ya hear bout Alexandria?"

"You mean Negan?" Daryl nods, his breath heavy. Kirsty moves closer to him, cupping his cheeks with her hands. "Hey," she says, lifting his face to hers. "You don't have anything to worry about, you know that, right? I love you."

Daryl nods. "I just don't like him bein out, that's all."

Kirsty kisses his forehead. "I know, but Rick wouldn't have allowed it if he didn't think it was the right thing to do. It's not like he's gonna ride on up here, Rick has people watching his every move."

"It's good we moved here. I'd rather be here at Hilltop than there with him," Daryl says. Kirsty rubs her stomach, wincing slightly. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, i'm fine. Well, i would be if this little one would stop kicking me in the ribs," she smiles, taking Daryl's hand and resting it against her stomach.

Daryl smiles as the baby kicks his hand. "Go put ya feet up, i'll make us somethin," he smiles.

Kirsty doesn't need to be told twice, waddling her way to the lounge. She puts her feet up on the sofa, looking over at Daryl with a smile as their unborn baby kicks inside her.


	25. The Final Chapter Negan

Negan sits on the Sanctuary steps, rubbing at his temples.

"Everything okay?" Simon asks, sitting down beside him.

"Fuck knows," Negan frowns, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I'm not sure i wanna go out there."

"Alexandria?" Simon asks.

"Alexandria, the other side of the street, fucking anywhere," Negan says.

"You don't wanna leave her," Simon nods with a smile.

Negan shakes his head. "No, i don't. But i'm not sure i can keep her here much longer, she doesn't want to be here."

"You made a deal though, right?"

"Yeah, but what's the fucking point if she hates my guts? And..," Negan shakes his head.

"What is it?" Simon presses.

"I.. i can't stand to see her unhappy. This is such bullshit, Simon. I've gone out of my way for her, saved her life, sat with her, i even fucking read to her, can you believe that?"

"You love her?"

"Woah, i'm not saying that," Negan looks down at Lucille in his hands. "But i care about her, a whole shitload in fact. But it doesn't matter, because she doesn't love me, she loves him."

"So you're gonna let her go to him?"

"Fuck, i don't know. I don't know which is stronger, my need to see her happy, or my need to make sure that red neck fuck can't have her. I mean, why the fuck should he get to be happy? What the fuck did he ever do for her?" Negan gets up from the steps. "Will you check in on her later, make sure she's okay?"

Simon stands up, hands on hips. "Sure thing. You sure about this? Going to Alexandria?"

"No, i'm fucking not. But what the fuck else am i supposed to do?" Negan smiles, swinging Lucille over his shoulder.

* * *

Negan sits behind the wheel, placing Lucille on the back seat. "Come on, Dwight, you can get in with me," he says.

Dwight gets in the passenger seat, playing with his hands nervously, adrenaline coursing through his veins.

Negan looks back at the Sanctuary, Kirsty on his mind. But then wasn't she always? "You good to fucking go?"

"Yeah," Dwight nods.

Negan turns on the engine and heads out the gate, a couple of his trucks behind him.

* * *

Kirsty runs through the town, panic setting in as she worries that the truck might be gone. Maybe someone had taken it? _Shut up!_ She frowns, struggling to catch her breath as she races down an alley. Her face lights up, Kirsty breathing a sigh of relief as she sees the truck in the distance.

She opens the door, jumping in the truck and switching on the engine. Kirsty inhales sharply, feeling pressure on her calf, snarls filling her ears. _Shit!_ She mouths, pulling her leg upwards and out of the walker's grasp. Kirsty brings her foot down on it's head, the feel of it's skull breaking sending shockwaves through her leg.

She steps out of the truck, cursing herself for not being more careful. Kirsty drags the walker from under the truck with ease, the dead thing having no bottom half. She sits back in the driver's seat, trying to catch her breath. Kirsty looks down at her leg. She leans over, rolling her jeans up. Kirsty falls back in the seat, a smile crossing her face briefly. _Shit that was close!_ She thinks.

Kirsty closes the door, stepping on the gas.

* * *

Gareth groans against the mattress, his eyes slowly flickering open. He rubs at the back of his head, a wave of relief washing over him when his hand comes back clean and not covered in blood.

"The hell?" He frowns, pushing himself up off the bed. He looks over at a table in the corner, miniature figurines made out of wood laid out upon it. Gareth gets up, turning the door knob in his hand. It's locked. "Shit! Hey!" He shouts, banging on the door. "Lemme out!" He takes a step back as the knob begins to turn.

The door opens, a woman he doesn't recognise pointing a gun at him. "Don't move!" Gareth holds up his hands, shakily. "Step out, slowly," she orders, taking a step back.

Gareth steps out into the hall, his throat dry. "What's going on?"

"I'm from Hilltop, don't do anything stupid, and you won't get hurt, understand?"

Gareth nods. "Yeah."

"Good. Come on, i'll take you to the others."

* * *

Negan drives down the road, Dwight sitting beside him. He stares out at the road with a frown. Something doesn't feel right, and he can't quite put his finger on it.

"This feel right to you?" Negan asks.

Dwight turns to him. "I don't know. He said he wants to talk, so we should talk. We're running low on supplies, we need the Hilltop at the very least."

Negan nods. "Yeah, i know that. I just can't shake the feeling that something's off. You feel that?"

Dwight shrugs his shoulders. "We've got more men, armed to the teeth. What can go wrong?"

"A lot of shit could go wrong," Negan turns his head, something catching his eye in the woods. "Shit, was that a herd?" He frowns.

Dwight turns his head. "I didn't see nothing."

"Maybe we should pull over? Make sure," Negan says, his foot stepping slowly off the gas.

"Maybe it was just a couple?" Dwight says. "John's out there, if he sees anything he'll holler on the radio."

Negan looks down at the radio in his lap, contemplating getting through to John himself. "Fuck it," Negan slows the truck to a stop. "Rick the prick can wait. I'm not fucking risking it," he says, picking up the radio.

Dwight glances at him nervously, knowing full well that John won't be answering the radio.

"John, this is Negan, you there?" Negan says, holding the radio. "John? Get off your fucking ass and answer this damn radio."

* * *

Kirsty speeds down the road, Negan's convoy nowhere in sight. _Come on, come on,_ she mouths, rocking backwards and forwards in her seat, willing the truck to go faster.

The warning light flashes on the dash, telling her the tank is low. _Fuck!_ She snarls, a series of coughs taking her over, no doubt from her silent screaming session earlier.

"John, this is Negan, you there?"

Kirsty slams on the brakes, the belt digging into her slightly as her body rocks forward. She unclips her belt, leaning over and grabbing her rucksack.

"John? Get off your fucking ass and answer this damn radio."

Kirsty holds the radio in her hands, staring at it uselessly. She presses the button down, tapping her hand against the steering wheel, not knowing what good it will do.

* * *

Negan frowns, holding the radio out in front of him. "What the fuck?" Negan pushes the button on his radio. "Who the fuck is this?" As he takes his finger off the button, all he hears is a series of taps. Negan steps out of the car, staring out the way they'd just come. "Fuck! See that, Dwight. I was fucking right!" He yells, pointing at a herd coming out of the woods.

The radio continues to make a racket in his hand, an engine revs, then nothing but silence.

"We should move," Dwight says, tugging at Negan's arm. "That herd is just gonna keep coming."

Negan shakes Dwight's hand from him, his eyes not leaving the road. He squints. "Who the fuck is that?" He points at a truck speeding down the road, heading straight for the herd. Negan recognises the truck, it's one they kept near the Sanctuary for emergencies. "Wait," Negan frowns, looking down at the radio. It dawns on him that maybe there was a reason the person over the radio was silent. "Kirsty," he whispers.

His Saviors all stand beside their trucks, watching the herd nervously.

Negan hears the truck brake, then he watches it attempt to swerve, veering wildly before it flips over, barrel rolling through the sea of dead and settling on it's roof.

"Noo!" Negan screams, running towards the truck that had landed roughly 100ft from the approaching herd.

He kneels down, his eyes searching inside the truck, but he finds it empty. Negan's eyes widen as he sees her rucksack resting against the smashed windshield, he grabs it, making sure it's definitely hers before throwing it over his shoulder. "Kirsty?" Negan stands up, looking all around for any sign of her. "Kirsty!" He shouts, drawing the attention of the dead.

His men look on in the distance, unsure of what to do.

"We've gotta get the hell outta here! That herd's coming straight for us!" One of his men yells, heading for his truck.

Dwight nods, his jaw clenched as he gets back in the car.

Negan scans the area frantically, the dead closing in on him. He spots a couple of walkers veering off to the side of the road. His eyes widen. "I don't fucking think so motherfuckers!" He spits, drawing his knife from his belt. Negan runs to the side of the road, quickly taking out the two walkers. He kneels down, his mouth wide and his eyes watering as he looks at Kirsty lying in the ditch. He can't tell what's walker blood and what's her own, as he presses his fingers against her neck, checking for a pulse.

He picks her up, not knowing what else to do with the dead approaching, and turns towards the trucks. "Fuck!" Negan stares at the empty road, his stomach rolling. He heads for the woods.

* * *

Negan runs, glancing down at Kirsty every few seconds, willing her to open her eyes. He can hear the dead behind him, still hungry for his scent.

Kirsty's arms flop lifelessly with every step he takes, her clothes saturated with a mix of sweat and blood.

"Come on!" Negan panics, as he runs through the woods. He sees buildings through the trees, picking up the pace as he races towards a run down bar.

Negan kicks at the door, holding it open with his shoulder as he carries her through. He places her down on a dusty pool table, checking her pulse once again. Negan checks her over for bites, his eyes moving frantically over her body. He rummages in her rucksack, grabbing a bottle of water. Negan takes off his scarf, pouring water over it before he wipes at her face. Apart from a couple of nasty grazes, her face looks fine. Negan places his fingers against her chin, pushing her head gently to the side. There's blood in her hair, but it's hard to tell if it's hers.

"Come on, baby," he says, softly, running his hands through Kirsty's hair. "Wake up."

Negan jumps as the doors swing open. He grabs a pool cue and races towards them, kicking at a walker before he slams the doors shut. Sliding the pool cue between the handles, he goes back to Kirsty, his lip trembling as he strokes her face. "Please, baby. We gotta go," he says, tears falling down his cheeks. Kirsty moves her head, her lips parting slightly. "Kirsty," he smiles. "That's it, baby, wake up."

She opens her eyes, her head pounding. _What..,_ Kirsty looks around, her eyes adjusting to the dingy bar.

"It's okay, baby," Negan assures her, stroking her hair. "Tell me where you're hurting?" She looks from left to right, her eyes struggling to focus. Negan places his hands either side of her face. "Baby, tell me where you're hurting?" He says, his voice soft yet firm.

 _I.. my head,_ she mouths, squinting her eyes.

"I can't see any cuts, let's try sitting you up," he says, placing his hand under her back.

Kirsty winces as he sits her up. _My entire body is aching._

"Well i should think it is, you just got thrown from a truck you little, badass," he laughs weakly. "Other than your head, does anywhere else hurt bad?"

Kirsty looks down at herself, trying to feel anything other than the throbbing in her head. _My ribs hurt, and my ankle._

He nods. "I'm not a doctor, but i think you bruised them. Just let me check your ankle," Negan says, kneeling down in front of her. He turns briefly to the double doors as he hears a crack. _Fuck!_ Negan panics, knowing the pool cue won't hold much longer. He lifts her pants leg, taking off her right boot. Kirsty winces. _Shit!_ He frowns, looking at her badly bruised and swollen ankle. He's not sure if it's broken, but if he had to guess, then he'd say it was. Negan puts her boot back on. "We gotta-," the doors burst open.

Negan tucks his arm under her legs and presses her firmly against his chest as he lifts her, running to the back of the bar. He kicks the door open, running out of the back of the building. Negan goes to run to his right, but the dead come round the corner, blocking his way. He turns left, shuffling Kirsty in his arms.

Kirsty holds onto him tightly, her arms round his neck. She wants to tell him that maybe she can walk, but she knows there's no chance he'll take any notice. Kirsty can feel his heart pounding against her through his leather jacket, sweat pouring down his face as he tries to find a way that isn't blocked by the dead.

Negan spins on his heels at the sound of a car. He squints his eyes.

Dwight sticks his head out of the driver's window. "Come on!" He yells.

Negan races towards the car, opening the back door and helping Kirsty inside. His eyes settle on Lucille, a smile crossing his face. He slams the door shut, the dead closing in on them once again. "Fuck!" Negan growls. "There's no way out!" He shouts, leaning in the passenger side.

Dwight looks out at the herd, his heart pounding against his chest. He shakes his head, unsure of what to say.

Negan stands tall, his eyes flitting from one dead fuck to the next. Then he looks through the back window at Kirsty, her face pained as she holds her ankle. Even now, covered in sweat, blood and god knows what else, his heart aches for her.

He leans in through the window, grabbing Lucille. "Get her to safety," he says, turning to Dwight.

 _Negan?_ Kirsty mouths in confusion.

He turns to her, a weak smile on his face. "I guess i do love you after all."

Negan runs away from the car. "Come on you fucks!" He screams, holding up Lucille.

 _Negan!_ Kirsty mouths, banging on the car window.

The dead swerve the car, heading for the fresh meat waving his bat and screaming loudly.

"Come on assholes!" Negan spits, baring his teeth as the dead follow him.

Kirsty watches in horror as he leads them away, walking backwards down an alley, dead coming at him from all directions. _Negan.._ she mouths, her eyes wide, tears on the brink. The car begins to move, and she turns to Dwight, pulling herself up by the headrest. _Stop! Stop the car!_ But he can't hear her. She grabs his shoulder, pulling at his shirt.

"Hey! Cut that shit out! I'm trying to get us outta here!" He shouts, slapping at her hand. Dwight speeds up, most of the dead following Negan down the alley.

Kirsty looks back at the herd, dead stumbling down the alley, and more dead heading towards the only way out. _Negan!_ She turns to Dwight again. _Stop the car!_ _Stop!_ "Stop!" She croaks out, her eyes wide.

Dwight jumps, the car swerving as he pulls to a stop. He turns to her. "Holy shit, did you just?"

Kirsty covers her mouth with her hand, not quite believing that sound just came from her. She nods. "G.. go, back," she stutters, her voice broken and husky.

Dwight shakes his head, his eyes wide. "Are you insane? He's gone. You wanna go back there so we can get ripped to pieces? I don't think so."

Kirsty takes the gun from her belt and aims it at Dwight. "Go, back," she says, her voice not much more than a whisper.

"Put that down," Dwight says. "You knew how this was gonna go down, he was gonna die anyway."

Kirsty presses the gun against his head, cocking the hammer with her thumb. He swallows deeply, his throat suddenly dry as he looks at the gun in her hand. "Get, out," she croaks.

Dwight holds up his hands. "Don't do anything stupid."

Kirsty lowers the gun and shoots him in the shoulder, blood splattering over her face.

"Shit!" Dwight screams, baring his teeth. "What the hell?" He yells, grabbing the top of his arm as blood pours through his fingers. The sound of the gun cocking once again silences him.

"Out," she rasps, her finger hovering over the trigger.

"You're fucking crazy! You know that?" Dwight winces. Kirsty stares at him coldly, her eyes red from crying. He's seen that look before. It's the same look she gave to Joe right before she smashed his skull to a pulp. He flinches as she raises the gun to his head. "Alright, i'll go," he says, lowering a hand to grab at the door handle.

She watches as he gets out of the car. He stands there for a moment, holding his arm, then he runs, heading for the woods. Kirsty shuffles her way between the gap, trying to get to the front seat. "Ahh," she cries out, though it's more air than sound. This was supposed to be a good thing, yet regaining her voice felt hollow considering the circumstances. "Negan," she sobs, her lip trembling as a fresh set of tears roll down her cheeks.

She'd seen him head down that alley, and she'd seen the walkers ready to cut him off at the exit. He'd gone out there knowing he would most likely die, and he'd done it for her, she knew that. Kirsty throws her head back against the seat, her hands white as she claws at the steering wheel. He runs through her mind, every memory of him like a punch to the face, everything he'd done for her. She shakes her head, her brows furrowed as she sobs, her hoarse cries filling the car. Kirsty screams, a real primal scream, or at least it would be if it hadn't come out as not much more than a squeak.

* * *

"Come on you fucks!" Negan screams, as he tries to draw the deads attention away from the car. "Come on assholes!" He slowly steps backwards, his eyes lit with fury as he nears the alley. Once he sees the car move, he picks up the pace, swinging Lucille as they close in on him. "Fucking fuckers! You want a piece of this ass you're gonna have to fucking work for it!" He snarls. Negan turns, getting ready to run when he spots more dead stumbling down from the other end of the alley. "Shit!"

He stands still, almost frozen on the spot, not seeing a way out. _Fuck!_ Then he spots a boarded up window to his left. Negan runs, swinging Lucille against the wood. He pulls Lucille back, her barbed wire coated in splinters, and swings her again, the board coming away with her. Negan grabs the piece of board with one hand, pulling at it. He doesn't feel the pieces of wood biting into his palm, too preoccupied with not dying. Negan swings Lucille against the board at the bottom, splitting it with a crack before he hurls himself through the window, dead fingers grabbing at his boots.

He lands on the dirty floor, his breath heavy as he turns to look out at the dead. He smirks, the window too high for them to get through.

Negan kisses Lucille's handle. "Jesus, baby. That was fucking close," he says, breathlessly, wiping at his brow. He makes his way to the front of the building. The doors are boarded up, and as he peeks through a gap, he sees the dead still making their way towards the alley. He wonders how long it'll take for them to clear? "We could be here a while, baby," he sits down, leaning against the doors. "Might as well get fucking comfortable."

* * *

Kirsty's eyes flicker open, her ankle throbbing and her head aching. But nothing hurts more than the pain in her chest, and she curses herself for falling asleep. How could she possibly sleep when he was gone? Her nose sniffles and her lip trembles, as her heart aches something fierce.

She should've made a move by now, she knows that. But the thought of going back to Alexandria, being around those who would be more than happy to learn of Negan's death, pains her. Kirsty looks at the road ahead, yet she doesn't see any way forward. She closes her eyes, tears spilling down her cheeks.

Kirsty jumps, drawing her knife at a bang on the car door. Her eyes widen, her mouth agape at the leather clad figure in front of her. _It's a trick. He's not really there._

But then he opens the door, kneeling down in front of her. "What the fuck are you still doing here?" Negan frowns. Kirsty shakes her head, an almost lunatic smile crossing her face as she stares down at him in disbelief. "Hey," he says, softly, his face falling. Negan leans into the car, and Kirsty throws her arms around his shoulders, burying her face in the crook of his neck. "It's okay, baby," he soothes her, rubbing at her back. He frowns, knowing something isn't right, but not quite putting his finger on it.

"Negan," she whispers, her voice husky.

His eyes widen as he realises what it is. She's crying, and he can hear it. Negan cups her cheeks, gazing at her. "Holy fuck, did you just?"

Kirsty nods, her hands not leaving his neck for even a moment, afraid that if she lets him go he'll vanish forever, as if him being there is just a cruel trick. "I, love, you," she sobs, her voice not much more than a whisper, but Negan hears her just fine.

He brushes his nose against hers. "I fucking love you, baby," he whispers against her mouth, before kissing her fiercely, his hands running through Kirsty's hair. Negan pulls away from her with a smile. "We need to get you back to the Sanctuary."

Kirsty shakes her head. "We-," she coughs again. Shit! Kirsty grabs her pad, not wanting to strain her newly regained vocals. _We can't. Dwight double crossed you, Rick has taken the Sanctuary,_ she writes.

"Fuck!" Negan frowns "That two faced mother fucker! I'll fucking kill him! I'll kill them all!"

Kirsty tilts his head up to hers. "Don't.. l.. let's go," she coughs into her hand, writing on her pad once again. _If you go back there, they'll kill you. Let's just go, just us, we can start afresh._

Negan reads it with wide eyes. He gazes up at her, his head tilting as he contemplates walking away, walking away from who he is and everything he's fought so hard to build. "You okay to move over, baby?" Kirsty nods, shuffling over to the passenger seat. Negan gets in, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. He starts the engine, and turns the car, heading away from the Sanctuary, from Alexandria, from everything.

* * *

Negan walks through the door, a smile on his face. "Baby, you wanna see what i got," he shouts from the hall. Negan makes his way to the kitchen, watching her wash the dishes. "Hey, do that shit later, i wanna show you something."

"Are you for real? How about you do them?" Kirsty frowns, her voice husky and perhaps an octave lower than what she used to be before, but she'd gotten used to it.

Negan smiles. "Will you just just come the fuck here?" Kirsty throws a cloth at him, Negan dodging it with a smirk. He makes his way over to her, running his hand through her hair as he kisses her sweetly.

"Hmm, i hate when you do that."

"Do what?" He whispers against her lips.

"Kiss me like that when i'm mad at you."

"You're not mad at me," he smirks, brushing his lip against hers.

Kirsty pulls away from him, crossing her arms. "Who says i'm not?"

Negan chuckles, pulling down the zip on his jacket. "Check this little beauty out."

Kirsty's face softens as the head of a pup peeks out of his jacket, a beautiful chocolate brown colour. "Oh my god!" She squeaks. "Where did you find him?" Kirsty smiles, stroking her fingers over his tiny head.

"Just as we were getting back from the drop off, there was a whole litter of them, their Mother.. well, i'd rather not say," Negan frowns.

Kirsty tilts her head, her face falling. "He's beautiful."

"He is, soon as i saw him i knew you'd love him," Negan smiles.

"How did the drop off go?" She asks.

"As well as can be expected. I mean, Rick didn't fucking kill me, so that's a positive," Negan chuckles.

"That's not funny," Kirsty frowns.

Negan strokes her shoulder. "Don't worry, baby. Rick isn't gonna do anything. He needs the trade from this place, and the people here like me, surprisingly."

"Hey, there's nothing surprising about it. You've changed since we got here, since you're not in charge any more," her face falls for a moment.

"What is it, baby?" Negan asks, softly.

"Do.. do you ever miss it? Being in charge?"

Negan smiles. "Fuck no, you don't need to worry about that, i like things the way they are. Fuck if i'd wanna be in charge again. I'm not gonna lie though, Rick's face was a fucking picture when he first found out i was here."

"I'll bet," Kirsty says. "I'm just.. i'm glad Daryl moved on, and don't look at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you used to look back in the day every time i mentioned his name. I'm happy for him and Rosita, it makes me feel better knowing he has someone, and that they're gonna have a family soon," Negan looks down at his feet, a hurt look on his face. Kirsty places her hand under his chin. "Hey, what's with the face?"

"I just, i wish that would happen for us," Negan says.

Kirsty smiles. "I know, and if we're meant to have children, it'll happen. But if it doesn't, then we still have each other."

Negan nods with a smile, he takes out the pup, holding it in his hands. "We need a name for this little guy."

Kirsty watches him kiss the pup, and her heart melts. "Max?"

"Max? Why Max?" Negan frowns.

"I had a dog called Max, and he looks like a Max, don't you think?"

"Hmm, Max it is then," Negan smiles, wrapping an arm around her as he holds Max between them. He chuckles as Kirsty makes cooing noises, stroking Max gently. "I love you, baby."

"I love you too," she smiles.

"I tell you what, how about you take this little guy, and go put your feet up. I'll make us something to eat," Negan smiles.

"You don't have to ask me twice," she smiles, taking Max and heading for the lounge. Kirsty sits on the sofa, Max nuzzling his nose against her arm. She breathes deeply, watching Negan with a content smile.


End file.
